Top 180 Al Franken Quotes (2024 Update)
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51. “I’m the New York Jew who actually grew up in Minnesota.”

— Al Franken

52. “During Vietnam, I was in college, enjoying my student deferment. The government wisely felt that, in my case, military service was less important than completing my studies to prepare me for my chosen career: comedian.”

— Al Franken

53. “Minnesotans lost their jobs because the credit rating agencies didn’t do the only job they’re supposed to have, the only job they had, which is to give accurate, objective ratings to financial products.”

— Al Franken

54. “Minnesotans know the difference between the job of satirist and the job of senator. And so do I.”

— Al Franken

55. “I’m crushed by the responsibility of writing a satirical book.”

— Al Franken

56. “As someone who’s spent time with our troops in Iraq and Afghanistan on USO tours and met wounded warriors at Walter Reed and Bethesda, I feel a deep obligation to the men and women who have risked life and limb on our behalf.”

— Al Franken

57. “We owe an historic debt to American Indians. They have a unique set of concerns that haven’t been addressed, and I’d like to stand with them. Also, I’d like to get their views on immigration.”

— Al Franken

58. “Liberals like me love America. We just love America in a different way.”

— Al Franken

59. “Teen pregnancy went way down in the ’90s, and 75 percent of it was because of increased use of contraception.”

— Al Franken

60. “There are as many forms of advice as there are colors of the rainbow. Remember that good advice can come from bad people and bad advice from good people. The important thing about advice is that it is simply that. Advice.”

— Al Franken

61. “The Medicare Part D prescription drug bill, which might be the most corrupt piece of legislation in history, was a huge giveaway of taxpayer funds to the big pharmaceutical companies.”

— Al Franken

62. “Demagoguery sells. And therefore, radio stations will put it on. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t do something else and also make it sell.”

— Al Franken

63. “But I really think that if we don’t start caring about whether people tell the truth or not, it’s going to be literally impossible to restore anything approaching a reasonable political discourse. Politicians have always shaded the truth. But if you can say something that is provably false, and no one cares, then you can’t have a real debate about anything. I.”

— Al Franken

64. “When you live in New York, one of two things happen – you either become a New Yorker, or you feel more like the place you came from.”

— Al Franken

65. “The Minnesotans I talk to are really concerned about what the future holds for their families. They’re trying to pay for health care and send their kids to college, they’re worried about declining home values, they’re scared for a loved one they have serving in Iraq.”

— Al Franken

66. “The problem with Ted isn’t that he’s humorless. It isn’t even his truly reprehensible far-right politics. No, the problem with Ted – and the reason so many senators have a problem with Ted – is simply that he is an absolutely toxic coworker. He’s the guy in your office who snitches to corporate about your March Madness pool and microwaves fish in the office kitchen. He is the Dwight Schrute of the Senate. In.”

— Al Franken

67. “People lucky enough to live in the vicinity of an industrial hog farm are, with each breath, made keenly aware of the cause of their declining property values.”

— Al Franken

68. “Franni knew I loved these tours, but one year she said to me in frustration, “You don’t see Bill O’Reilly going on USO tours.” “That’s not fair, honey,” I said. “He has no talent.”

— Al Franken

69. “My dad never graduated high school. He was a printing salesman. We lived in a two-bedroom, one-bath house in St. Louis Park, Minnesota. We weren’t rich – but we felt secure.”

— Al Franken

70. “I am a Minnesotan, and not just because I root for the Vikings and the Twins. I like the Minnesota-nice sensibility. I like the liberal tradition; I like the Hubert Humphrey tradition fighting for civil rights.”

— Al Franken

71. “What you see on the campaign trail is me. It’s easy being me.”

— Al Franken

72. “I hope you realize, in a democracy, laughter is assent.”

— Al Franken

73. “Bob Dole used to be really funny. Barney Frank can be kind of funny. Bob Kerrey has a good sense of humor.”

— Al Franken

74. “When I first started writing for television in the seventies and eighties, the Internet didn’t exist, and we didn’t need to worry about foreign websites illegally distributing the latest TV shows and blockbuster movies online.”

— Al Franken

75. “Former Massachusetts congressman Barney Frank once said, “I only voted once for someone who believes in 100 percent of what I believe. And that’s when I voted for myself – the first time.”

— Al Franken

76. “I know I’m sort of farting into the wind on this. But I hope you’ll fart along with me. I’ve always believed that it’s possible to discern true statements from false statements, and that it’s critically important to do so, and that we put our entire democratic experiment in peril when we don’t. It’s a lesson I fear our nation is about to learn the hard way. That’s.”

— Al Franken

77. “Bill Clinton is the greatest president of the 20th century because I played touch football with him.”

— Al Franken

78. “I had a great time working on the movies, both the major movies I’ve done. I’ve had a great time. I like the people in Hollywood a lot.”

— Al Franken

79. “Having an actual income can expand your romantic horizons toward the more appealing end of the spectrum.”

— Al Franken

80. “I know this seems quaint, but back in 2008, Republicans did not consider “demeaning and degrading women” to be senatorial, let alone presidential.”

— Al Franken

81. “Google might be doping the horses.”

— Al Franken

82. “My dad was a terrible businessman.”

— Al Franken

83. “Virtually everyone in the world believes that climate change is real and is caused by human beings, except Republicans in the United States.”

— Al Franken

84. “I get satisfaction when I write something I like, when I’m happy with it.”

— Al Franken

85. “Gary Bauer is a very good – he’s a good friend of mine.”

— Al Franken

86. “My views about God come from my dad. Dad told me that he believed Nature, which to him included humankind, to be so beautiful, so magnificent, that there had to be something behind it all.”

— Al Franken

87. “It’s hard for a liberal to go on between Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh, because it’s like doing country music after hip-hop. I mean, just, the audience doesn’t go from one to the other.”

— Al Franken

88. “There’s plenty of room for humor in politics, God knows, but it’s a serious business.”

— Al Franken

89. “Well, a lot of politics is communicating with people, and obviously comedy has something to do with that. I’ve been a producer and led people. Also, being a comedian, you’re under pressure.”

— Al Franken

90. “Unions gave us the forty-hour workweek, the weekend, and the middle class.”

— Al Franken

91. “If you use Facebook – as I do – Facebook in all likelihood has a unique digital file of your face, one that can be as accurate as a fingerprint and that can be used to identify you in a photo of a large crowd.”

— Al Franken

92. “But in the right-wing media, they do have a right-wing bias. And they also have an agenda. So their agenda is: we’re an adjunct of the Republican Party, and we’re going push that agenda every day, and, as you say, brand these stories that help further the right-wing cause.”

— Al Franken

93. “I’ve never understood why we would want to deny all the joys – and the challenges – of marriage to anyone. Which is why I think any loving, committed couple – gay or straight – should be able to get married.”

— Al Franken

94. “I just can’t sit still and meditate; that doesn’t kind of work for me. I don’t even know exactly what it means.”

— Al Franken

95. “I wish I had spent more time at the office and less time in prison.”

— Al Franken

96. “I think that the default for collecting any kind of personal data should be opt-in consent.”

— Al Franken

97. “I’m part of the mushball middle. I consider ‘confused’ the majority position because, thankfully, most people would rather be uncertain some of the time than 100% positive all the time – even when they’re wrong.”

— Al Franken

98. “The thing that interests me least about the radio business is the radio business. But I’ve had to learn a little bit about it. It’s not rocket science: You get ratings, that’s good.”

— Al Franken

99. “Net neutrality has been in place since the very beginning of the Internet.”

— Al Franken

100. “It’s really building Air America that I’m focused on, and for me, that almost only means doing a good show.”

— Al Franken