“Toby liked to say he chose not to be impulsive. As if being impulsive were something you consciously decide. When I look at Starling, with her turquoise turban and wet knot of hair, and at Rowan, with his stack of cheap string anklets, I think: Impulsive isn’t something you choose. It’s something you are. Like gay, or freckled or bipolar. Something I pretend to be but am not. Not really. Not deep down.”
