“Things fifty years old or older are considered ‘antique.’ Anything thirty years old to fifty is called ‘vintage.’ So I’m not even close to vintage, although of course you are swiftly approaching that.” “Thanks. So what does that make you?” “I’m a child. My mother, however, is antique.” “Well, let’s not tell her that, okay?” “Why not? It’s true.” “Lots of true things aren’t polite to say.”
