Top 200 Stewart Stafford Quotes (2026 Update)
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201. “The stresses and strains of life mould us into our mature selves. The key to life is to accept the wisdom of our later years while maintaining our youthful enthusiasm and curiosity for the world.”

— Stewart Stafford

202. “I once got hit by revolving scenery in a production of Marlowe’s Doctor Faustus. It whacked my hip, bruised my ego, got an unintentional laugh, but the show went on, and it still does.”

— Stewart Stafford

203. “If I decide to get a tattoo, it’ll be a map of where I live on my chest in case I ever get amnesia.”

— Stewart Stafford

204. “Fantasy is a reaction to the constraints of reality.”

— Stewart Stafford

205. “The foundation of Hollywood alchemically turned celluloid into gold and insincerity into an art form.”

— Stewart Stafford

206. “Arguing is the Olympics of talking.”

— Stewart Stafford

207. “If your written words become literal nails to crucify you with, then you have done your job well. You provoked a reaction, whether it is positive or negative is irrelevant. Writing that evokes no reaction is a body without a soul.”

— Stewart Stafford

208. “An obsessive is an addict-in-waiting.”

— Stewart Stafford

209. “Some countries believe that, once they have rid themselves of a monarchy and become a republic, they have morphed into a kind of Utopia. When, in fact, they have merely created another set of compromises for themselves.”

— Stewart Stafford

210. “Any time you see a cat, the day automatically becomes 10% better.”

— Stewart Stafford

211. “They promise us once-in-a-lifetime bargains in the orgies of consumerism that are Black Friday and Cyber Monday. More likely, we end up with precious little, vacant souls and an ever-decreasing appreciation of humanity.”

— Stewart Stafford

212. “It is often asked why the greatest performers are so timid in private. Confident people get attention naturally. Shy people must do something extraordinary or outrageous to have similar recognition.”

— Stewart Stafford

213. “Attempting to appropriate or denigrate the popularity of others will backfire and undermine yours.”

— Stewart Stafford

214. “Truly successful writers blend the personal and the profound to enlighten and entertain readers while simultaneously banking something for posterity. Remuneration is a wonderful afterthought.”

— Stewart Stafford

215. “I don’t believe in yesterday, I believe in tomorrow. Whether it’s positive or negative, the future is a new experience and not a ghostly replay of a time that was and can never be again.”

— Stewart Stafford

216. “The moment you think you can get in the ring with the heavyweight champion of the world and bluff your way through the fight is about the same time you see your bloody teeth on the canvas and wonder how they got there. Remember the five P’s – ‘Prior preparation prevents poor performance!”

— Stewart Stafford

217. “The hand that pockets the corrupt coin places it in the collection plate seeking absolution.”

— Stewart Stafford

218. “Enemies are either defeated, befriended or bypassed.”

— Stewart Stafford

219. “Fortunately, most of our vital physiological functions are involuntary, as some amongst us would forget them.”

— Stewart Stafford

220. “2020 is the year that black people became the center of the universe, white people got evicted from the human race, and buying toilet paper became the new gold rush.”

— Stewart Stafford

221. “Whether we live for seconds or a hundred years, none of us goes before our time. We’re all here to do something, and once we’ve done it, we go back from whence we came.”

— Stewart Stafford

222. “Why did Irish people vote to introduce gay marriage? Because we know what discrimination feels like and if we can take the boot of oppression off someone else’s throat, we’ll do it every time.”

— Stewart Stafford

223. “Space is often compared to our oceans. Throw a stone at the water and the density smothers its propulsion. Skim the stone across the surface and the propulsion is mostly preserved with minimal drag. This kind of approach could work for NASA’s mission to Mars.”

— Stewart Stafford

224. “Strive to leave a legacy beyond your limitations and far beyond the expectations of others.”

— Stewart Stafford

225. “The coronavirus outbreak feels like an episode of The Twilight Zone. I went to see a doctor the other day, and they told me to wear a face mask. Then they said how much it would cost to see the doctor and I told them THEY were the ones who should be wearing masks!”

— Stewart Stafford

226. “Lies are a vacation from the self.”

— Stewart Stafford

227. “I guess everyone gets more attractive as your eyesight decreases with age. That’s something to look forward to until you can’t see anymore.”

— Stewart Stafford

228. “Sickness is a benign rehearsal for death. With luck, some other understudy will go on in your stead before your final bow becomes inevitable.”

— Stewart Stafford

229. “You could fill three lifetimes with the things people say about you when you’re not there.”

— Stewart Stafford

230. “The snowflake revolution will not be televised – it will be pirated online, go viral and rapidly dissipate in the quicksand of post-millennial conformity.”

— Stewart Stafford

231. “There are moments when disappointment comes to seek your soul as musicians do with notes, and the more these are wide and deep, the more a single word or gesture is enough to make music resonate within you that you would never want to hear.”

— Stewart Stafford

232. “Karens have a best friend – Becky. She’s the one who goes with them to talk to the manager and backs them up and remains silent when she calls the cops on black guys she sees in her area. Becky is Karen’s tag-team partner and an enabler. Don’t be a Becky.”

— Stewart Stafford