Top 5 A.J. Aalto Quotes (2024 Update)

1. “My name’s Marnie Baranuik, and I’m not usually a squirrel; I’m a recovering cookie addict, ex-forensic psychic, and head of the pre-ternatural biology department at the Boulder branch of Chapel’s PCU. Mostly, I feed rat brains to zombie beetles and fail to solve Sudoku puzzles. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve done dozens of super-serious stake-outs; this time, it was even for a real case.”

— A.J. Aalto

2. “Why did that work?” Batten wanted to know. “Dissolved by the chemical horror of diet soft drinks?” I suggested. “Maybe Monsanto really is the greater of two evils.”

— A.J. Aalto

3. “I was about to be handled with all the determination of a Hollywood dermatologist on a starlet’s rash.”

— A.J. Aalto

4. “Because you expected shambling, zombie-speed. Any human can outrun a shambling zombie. Just pop behind a tree or dive in a bush. Zombies are dumb as stumps. They won’t think to look there unless the bokor orders it. Kids know. Pulling your blankets up over your head fools some monsters. If they can’t see you, they give up and stumble off down the hall to eat your parents.”

— A.J. Aalto

5. “Okay,” Bruce said easily. “Feel your feels, lady, totally.”

— A.J. Aalto

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