Top 30 A. Lee Martinez Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “The wisest man knows he know nothing.”

— A. Lee Martinez

2. “Those who write are writers. Those who wait are waiters.”

— A. Lee Martinez

3. “He gives me the hairy eyeball, and asks me to help him find his pancreas.”

— A. Lee Martinez

4. “Because life is complicated and difficult. Anyone who says otherwise hasn’t truly lived.”

— A. Lee Martinez

5. “It was one thing to hide away from the world. It was quite another to discover the world didn’t miss you when you were gone.”

— A. Lee Martinez

6. “Heroes are carried on the backs of a thousand forgotten faces.”

— A. Lee Martinez

7. “I lied, therefore I thought.”

— A. Lee Martinez

8. “Destiny was a hope found in the hearts of desperate men. But sometimes, if they believed strongly enough, desperate men could do great things.”

— A. Lee Martinez

9. “It’s all well and good to set reasonable goals, but when unreasonable goals are your only choice, you should always strive for them. Because it’s not really a choice at all.”

— A. Lee Martinez

10. “Reality is like a fruitcake; pretty enough to look at but with all sorts of nasty things lurking just beneath the surface.”

— A. Lee Martinez

11. “A bot had to find his own way, and I’d figured out that functioning for function’s sake was pointless.” – Mack Megaton.”

— A. Lee Martinez

12. “The voice on the other end said, “Lord Mollusk, we’ve lost China.” “Define lost.” “It’s not there anymore, sir.” “Well, that’s no good, is it?” I said. “No, sir. We thought you should know.” “Yes, I’ll look into it. Mollusk out.”

— A. Lee Martinez

13. “In the middle of nowhere, along a quiet stretch of road, the diner dreamt of the hungry dead. And of two men.”

— A. Lee Martinez

14. “Terrible errors are rarely made all at once. Usually they are performed one small misstep at a time.”

— A. Lee Martinez

15. “Relations between Terra and Luna had been strained since the Lunans had eaten Neil Armstrong in 1960.”

— A. Lee Martinez

16. “Quiet descended, a silence so consuming that even the drafty corridors ceased whistling. Bog wasn’t certain where to look, so he solved the problem by plucking out his eyes and sticking them in a drawer.”

— A. Lee Martinez

17. “I emitted an ultrasonic signal. The beast climbed off her and scampered to my side. “Good girl, Snarg.” I patted her between the antennae, and she squeaked. Zala stood. “By the hidden moon, what is that?” “My pet ultrapede.” “I wouldn’t expect you to have a pet.” “Snarg was a gift of the ambassador of the Undersphere. She’s the fiercest ultrapede ever bred for the royal family. How could I turn down a gift like that?”

— A. Lee Martinez

18. “Ned passed the next few minutes quietly not dying in his office, and was pleased with how well it was going. He’d stayed alive longer, but now that he was concentrating on it, it felt more like an accomplishment.”

— A. Lee Martinez

19. “A sixth sense warned her that she was striking a Faustian bargain. Odd, since she wasn’t sure what a Faustian bargain was. But it was something not to be taken lightly. She knew that.”

— A. Lee Martinez

20. “It’s better to think the best of everyone and be wrong than assume the worst and be right.”

— A. Lee Martinez

21. “We all save ourselves child, even if we are fortunate enough to have help along the way.”

— A. Lee Martinez

22. “Most magic wasn’t even magic. It just was.”

— A. Lee Martinez

23. “See, when something’s the right thing to do, you don’t do it for a reward.”

— A. Lee Martinez

24. “It was one of the marks of sentience, the ability to distinguish reality from fantasy and still indulge in fantasy. In other words: I lied, therefore I thought.”

— A. Lee Martinez

25. “We have to destroy the radioactive brain of Madame Curie.”

— A. Lee Martinez

26. “Self-preservation was a basic directive, but there wasn’t a robot functioning that prioritized it at the top of the list. Like biologicals all robots were seeking a purpose. Autos and drones were lucky enough to have that built into them. A bot had to find his own way and I’d figured out that functioning for function’s sake was pointless. The real question was finding a directive worth getting scrapped for.”

— A. Lee Martinez

27. “Death should take more care with his paperwork.”

— A. Lee Martinez

28. “Damn, some days I wished I’d been made a toaster.”

— A. Lee Martinez

29. “All coincidences are Odd. That’s what makes them coincidences.”

— A. Lee Martinez

30. “I stand corrected. Yours is a far superior arbitrary system of governance.”

— A. Lee Martinez

31. “He’d discovered that most of the terrors that stalked the night weren’t really terrors at all. They were mostly like regular folks, just trying to live their lives. As long as they were left alone they were perfectly harmless except for the occasional bite on the neck. Humans were the real terrors, always getting worked up and looking to kill something.”

— A. Lee Martinez

32. “The middle was where it was too easy to be lazy and cynical at the same time.”

— A. Lee Martinez

33. “See, the way I got it figured, dying is sort’a like the thing that gives your life meaning. You may not want to get there, but, without it, you’re just looking at a long, long road to nowhere.”

— A. Lee Martinez

34. “The fate of the universe didn’t rest in the hands of the giants. It could be found in the littlest things. Anything done well was a worthy accomplishment, whether it be unwrapping arcane secrets or sweeping halls, raising kingdoms from the ocean or washing dishes. All tasks, great or small, were of equal importance in the end. Without peasants, there could be no kings. Without soldiers, there was no army.”

— A. Lee Martinez