Top 2 Alex Karne Quotes (2026 Update)

1. “Matter exists in five distinct states: solid, liquid, gas, plasma, and paperback. Gasses expand to fill all available space, and books are no different. Once they reach critical mass, they explode outward into every nook and crevice of a dwelling.”

— Alex Karne

2. “It had been decided that the apocalypse would begin on Christmas Day. There had been some haggling over the specific time, but in the end, they had decided it had to come late enough that everyone would get to open their presents, but before they realized that the batteries were missing.”

— Alex Karne

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