Top 300 Alexis Hall Quotes (2026 Update)
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151. “Yeah. Turns out bisexuals ain’t like quinoa. You get ’em round my way too.”

— Alexis Hall

152. “Make Max change his name instead,” I suggested. “I already thought of that, but he says Max Miller sounds like a serial killer. And I don’t want to be married to a serial killer.”

— Alexis Hall

153. “If I was lucky, we’d be able to pass the time until the ceremony just saying each other’s names back and forth in tones of increasing concern.”

— Alexis Hall

154. “I don’t want it if I can’t have it with you.”

— Alexis Hall

155. “No, you can deal with. Don’t know is the most frightening thing of all.”

— Alexis Hall

156. “What we want and what we need and what we think is best aren’t always the same.”

— Alexis Hall

157. “As far as I’m concerned, depravity applies only to acts committed without consent or without care.”

— Alexis Hall

158. “Kissing like Alfie had always imagined it was supposed to be. Movie-star-magic-silver-screen-fireworks-in-the-sky kissing. Endless and restless, like the sea beating in the distance. Like listening to a shell, except it was everything and everywhere, the taste.”

— Alexis Hall

159. “This is the story of my life: standing on the edges of things and worrying, when I’m supposed to just walk through them.”

— Alexis Hall

160. “This woman did not look like my Nan. At all. It was like she’d been whittled down until she was nothing but skin and ferocity.”

— Alexis Hall

161. “Once again, I tried to safe-word to Oliver with my eyes.”

— Alexis Hall

162. “But Oliver had the sort of perfect symmetry that eighteenth-century philosophers would have taken as evidence for the existence of God.”

— Alexis Hall

163. “Three months ago Valentine would have said no because it was easy to be gracious when you were largely indifferent. When manner were just another mask. Three weeks ago, he would have said yes because his wounded pride demanded it. But what Valentine cared about, and what he didn’t, had been in the oddest state of flux lately.”

— Alexis Hall

164. “I tried to go back to sleep, but knowing somebody had been watching took all the fun out of being unconscious.”

— Alexis Hall

165. “I had no idea it would be like this. That having someone on their knees for you would make you so vulnerable.”

— Alexis Hall

166. “Yes, I was a faery-blooded, thirty-something PI with trust issues and a drinking problem, and she was a bloodthirsty undead nun with a pudding fixation, but I honestly thought we were in with a chance.”

— Alexis Hall

167. “Life with Mum and Judy had been this bubble I’d kept other people away from, partly because I was worried they wouldn’t understand, but also because, I guess, in some odd way, I wanted it to stay mine. This private space where Mum would always be cooking – or saying – something awful, and she and Judy would always be far too into whatever hobby or book or TV show had caught their attention this week, and I would always be welcome and safe and loved.”

— Alexis Hall

168. “I’d make a pretty terrible Mr. Darcy.” “I don’t know.” Tariq gave him a playful look from beneath his eyelashes. “You’re rich, white, and awkward.”

— Alexis Hall

169. “There was a silence where you would very much hope there would not be a silence.”

— Alexis Hall

170. “We’ll go somewhere nice and photographable.”

— Alexis Hall

171. “You know that bit in the Bible when they’re all like, ‘Yo Peter, do you know this Jesus bloke?’ and he’s like, ‘Hell, no.’ It was like that, but even worse.” “My word.”

— Alexis Hall

172. “I yanked the bolt out of the poor bugger’s chest, and he snapped upright like Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction. “Well, that was annoying. Stupid bloody professional vampire hunters.”

— Alexis Hall

173. “For the record, I sounded extremely dignified when I said this. And not at all pathetic.”

— Alexis Hall

174. “That I did not know how to see you,′ he told her, ’is not your lie.”

— Alexis Hall

175. “Kink crowds are the same the world over. The good ones are already taken, the hot ones only talk to each other, and everyone else is desperate.”

— Alexis Hall

176. “We were going to have a pleasant conversation over sherry if it killed us both.”

— Alexis Hall

177. “Thank you,” was all I could think to say. But it wasn’t just a dominance game. I meant it. Thank you for the pain. Thank you for letting it mean so much to you. Thank you for believing I’m beautiful. Thank you for making me feel so powerful. Thank you for loving me. Thank you. Thank you.”

— Alexis Hall

178. “As long as the Beetle Drive is successful, you may go to whatever bars you please and wear whatever mammalian appendages you like.”

— Alexis Hall

179. “I don’t really get on with my mother. It’s one of those classic generational things. She’s a blood-drenched embodiment of primal hunger who keeps taking over my body and I’ve got a body I don’t want taken over. I suppose that’s what you call an impasse.”

— Alexis Hall

180. “I get that you have a weird professional duty to respect the wishes of people who want their kids to stay homophobic for as long as possible. But hopefully you get why that isn’t my problem. And if you ever try to make it Amelie’s problem again, I will lodge a formal complaint with the governors.” Miss Wooding de-flinched slightly. “As long as she doesn’t – ” “No ‘as long as she doesn’t.’ You’re not teaching my daughter to be ashamed of me.”

— Alexis Hall

181. “I think you’ve drifted from ‘giving me a pep-talk’ into ‘advocating arson’.”

— Alexis Hall

182. “Valentine gave him a cool look, the tip of a brow inching upwards. “I sleep until a reasonable hour and am helped into my clothing by my valet.”

— Alexis Hall

183. “Jonathan recoils slightly. “That is... ” Being nice doesn’t come easy to Jonathan Forest, but being nice about Gollum doesn’t come easy to anybody. “an interesting-looking pet,” he finishes.”

— Alexis Hall

184. “In any case, I wasn’t prepared for the truth of you.”

— Alexis Hall

185. “I’m starting to think you should always push your luck. No, you can deal with. Don’t know is the most frightening thing of all.”

— Alexis Hall

186. “I thought of Marius. Wild, wonderful, Byronic-fantasy Marius, who had somehow found something he wanted in the everyday quietness of me. Until he hadn’t.”

— Alexis Hall

187. “Maybe even wasn’t the point at all and you didn’t have to keep a constant record of who owed what to whom. Because most people, at least most people you wanted in our life, wouldn’t be out to use it against you anyway.”

— Alexis Hall

188. “Let your life lightly dance on the edges of Time.”

— Alexis Hall

189. “Children are stronger than you think. Besides, they haven’t had years and years of silly people filling their heads with silly ideas about what you’re meant to do or say or be.”

— Alexis Hall

190. “I kissed him. Or he kissed me. I couldn’t tell who’d started it. But it didn’t matter. All that mattered was that we were kissing. I missed you kisses and I want you kisses and we’re better together kisses and kisses that felt like sorry and kisses that felt like promises and kisses that could be tomorrow and the next day and the next.”

— Alexis Hall

191. “I would not be who I am without him. I have many regrets, but knowing Marleigh – even if that meant losing him – could never be one of them.”

— Alexis Hall

192. “I think what you’re underestimating here is how much better I can get and still be a complete disaster.”

— Alexis Hall

193. “I’m advocating taking a chance on a nice man who you’re clearly into and who’ll treat you well. And if you think that’s arson, then yay, arson.”

— Alexis Hall

194. “Okay, I know you can’t see it, but I’m holding up the fetishisation card.” “What does that card even look like?” “It looks like two adorable men in sweaters holding hands under a rainbow.” “I thought you wanted to hold hands with an adorable man under a rainbow.” “I do, but the fact you want it almost as much as I do is what makes it creepy.”

— Alexis Hall

195. “I quietly ignored the banana.”

— Alexis Hall

196. “Elise’s enthusiasm for the whiteboard was on the charming edge of creepy. She’d told me once it liked to be involved, which I’d carefully blanked in case she decided to share any more of the private thoughts of my office furniture.”

— Alexis Hall

197. “You cannot begin to imagine the acts she has committed or the secrets she holds.” “Now you’re just trying to turn me on.” “Katharine!”

— Alexis Hall

198. “Compromises are usually just a solution nobody wants.” “That’s how it works in my family. We sit down and come to a civilized agreement we all hate.”

— Alexis Hall

199. “Jonathan’s face is absolutely thunderous. It’s like he wants to fire everyone in the room but can’t because they’re his family and that’s not how it works.”

— Alexis Hall

200. “My heart, I think, turned tender in the untouched dark. I’m full of small, gathered hopes that, if I let them, will fly away from me, as fragile as dandelion seeds. The.”

— Alexis Hall