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Top 25 Bennett Cerf Quotes (2025 Update)

Bennett Cerf Quote: “The person who can bring the spirit of laughter into a room is indeed blessed.”

1. “The person who can bring the spirit of laughter into a room is indeed blessed.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don’t recognize you.”

2. “Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don’t recognize you.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Politicians are like ships: noisiest when lost in a fog.”

3. “Politicians are like ships: noisiest when lost in a fog.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “There once was a student named Bessor Whose knowledge grew lessor and lessor. It at last grew so small He knew nothing at all, And today he’s a college professor!”

4. “There once was a student named Bessor Whose knowledge grew lessor and lessor. It at last grew so small He knew nothing at all, And today he’s a college professor!”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Most of the things that are supposed to be so objectionable in books are things that every teenager, in the United States, not only knows, but has talked about at length in school, or on the way home from school.”

5. “Most of the things that are supposed to be so objectionable in books are things that every teenager, in the United States, not only knows, but has talked about at length in school, or on the way home from school.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “I don’t stutter when I talk to God. He loves me.”

6. “I don’t stutter when I talk to God. He loves me.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “I can’t say this too often – that a little humor can make life worth living. That has always been my credo. Somebody once asked me, ‘What would you like your epitaph to be?’ I’ve always said that I’d like it to be: He left people a little happier than they were when he came into the room.”

7. “I can’t say this too often – that a little humor can make life worth living. That has always been my credo. Somebody once asked me, ‘What would you like your epitaph to be?’ I’ve always said that I’d like it to be: He left people a little happier than they were when he came into the room.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Coleridge was a drug addict. Poe was an alcoholic. Marlowe was killed by a man whom he was treacherously trying to stab. Pope took money to keep a woman’s name out of a satire, then wrote a piece so that she could still be recognized, anyhow. Chatterton killed himself. Byron was accused of incest. Do you still want to a writer -and if so, why?”

8. “Coleridge was a drug addict. Poe was an alcoholic. Marlowe was killed by a man whom he was treacherously trying to stab. Pope took money to keep a woman’s name out of a satire, then wrote a piece so that she could still be recognized, anyhow. Chatterton killed himself. Byron was accused of incest. Do you still want to a writer -and if so, why?”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Fame – anyone who says he doesn’t like it is crazy.”

9. “Fame – anyone who says he doesn’t like it is crazy.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “An oboe is an ill-wind that nobody blows good.”

10. “An oboe is an ill-wind that nobody blows good.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Oratory is the art of making a loud noise sound like a deep thought.”

11. “Oratory is the art of making a loud noise sound like a deep thought.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “The fundamental difference between the mystery story and the ghost story is the fact that a mystery demands a solution for its effectiveness; a ghost story is necessarily unsolvable; the reader must be willing to accept the fact that nothing is proved.”

12. “The fundamental difference between the mystery story and the ghost story is the fact that a mystery demands a solution for its effectiveness; a ghost story is necessarily unsolvable; the reader must be willing to accept the fact that nothing is proved.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “One of the greatest threats facing book publishing, and the entire country for that matter, is censorship.”

13. “One of the greatest threats facing book publishing, and the entire country for that matter, is censorship.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Gross ignorance is 144 times worse than ordinary ignorance.”

14. “Gross ignorance is 144 times worse than ordinary ignorance.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “The Detroit String Quartet played Brahms last night. Brahms lost.”

15. “The Detroit String Quartet played Brahms last night. Brahms lost.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Do I believe in ghosts? Of course I do. So do you. Deep in the souls of the most sophisticated of us is lurking a fear of the supernatural which all the discoveries of scientists cannot eradicate.”

16. “Do I believe in ghosts? Of course I do. So do you. Deep in the souls of the most sophisticated of us is lurking a fear of the supernatural which all the discoveries of scientists cannot eradicate.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Good manners: The noise you don’t make when you’re eating soup.”

17. “Good manners: The noise you don’t make when you’re eating soup.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “For me, a hearty “belly laugh” is one of the beautiful sounds in the world.”

18. “For me, a hearty “belly laugh” is one of the beautiful sounds in the world.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Censor: A self-appointed snoophound who sticks his nose in other people’s business.”

19. “Censor: A self-appointed snoophound who sticks his nose in other people’s business.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “The Atomic Age is here to stay – but are we?”

20. “The Atomic Age is here to stay – but are we?”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “I think it’s become fashionable for the snobbish egghead today to make fun of television. I’ve heard many people, boast, “I would never have a television set in my house,” well, these people are fools.”

21. “I think it’s become fashionable for the snobbish egghead today to make fun of television. I’ve heard many people, boast, “I would never have a television set in my house,” well, these people are fools.”

— Bennett Cerf

Featured in: Fun Quotes

Bennett Cerf Quote: “There is a mass of people, we might as well admit, who if they weren’t watching television, would be doing absolutely nothing else.”

22. “There is a mass of people, we might as well admit, who if they weren’t watching television, would be doing absolutely nothing else.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “TV’s sameness has destroyed many things, such as the American urge toward independent thought.”

23. “TV’s sameness has destroyed many things, such as the American urge toward independent thought.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Banquet: a plate of cold, hairy chicken and artificially coloured green peas completely surrounded by dreary speeches and appeals for donations.”

24. “Banquet: a plate of cold, hairy chicken and artificially coloured green peas completely surrounded by dreary speeches and appeals for donations.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Television, I love it, everything that happened before television lumped together, never caused folks to turn on a street to stare at me, or waitresses to ask for autographs.”

25. “Television, I love it, everything that happened before television lumped together, never caused folks to turn on a street to stare at me, or waitresses to ask for autographs.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “I think the right to read, is one of our inherent rights, and I think that people in America today are intelligent enough to decide for themselves what they want to read. Without being told, by self-appointed people, you must not read this, or you cannot read this.”

26. “I think the right to read, is one of our inherent rights, and I think that people in America today are intelligent enough to decide for themselves what they want to read. Without being told, by self-appointed people, you must not read this, or you cannot read this.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “The fact that we don’t read more books in America can be traced squarely to the fact that we have newspapers that are about a hundred times as big as the newspapers anywhere else.”

27. “The fact that we don’t read more books in America can be traced squarely to the fact that we have newspapers that are about a hundred times as big as the newspapers anywhere else.”

— Bennett Cerf

Bennett Cerf Quote: “Football season: The only time of the year when a man can walk down the street with a blond on one arm and a blanket on the other without encountering raised eyebrows.”

28. “Football season: The only time of the year when a man can walk down the street with a blond on one arm and a blanket on the other without encountering raised eyebrows.”

— Bennett Cerf

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