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Top 500 Bill Bryson Quotes (2025 Update)
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Bill Bryson Quote: “When even camels can’t manage a desert, you know you’ve found a tough part of the world.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Dying is, to coin a phrase, the last thing your body wants to do.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “At a conference of sociologists in America in 1977, love was defined as “the cognitive-affective state characterized by intrusive and obsessive fantasizing concerning reciprocity of amorant feelings by the object of the amorance.” That is jargon – the practice of never calling a spade a spade when you might instead call it a manual earth-restructuring implement – and it is one of the great curses of modern English.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Life in Australia would go on, and I would hear nothing, because once you leave Australia, Australia ceases to be.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Medieval banquets show people eating all kinds of foods that are no longer eaten. Birds especially featured. Eagles, herons, peacocks, sparrows, larks, finches, swans, and almost all other feathered creatures were widely consumed. This wasn’t so much because swans and other birds were fantastically delicious – they weren’t; that’s why we don’t eat them now – but rather because other, better meats weren’t available.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “You discard about a hundred billion red blood cells every day. They are a big component of what makes your stools brown.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Noting the lack of crime or security in the Netherlands, the author asked a native who guarded a national landmark. He got the replay, “We all do.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “In January of that year, according to a report written in America by a Times reporter, scientists were seriously investigating the possibility that a mysterious seismic disturbance in the remote Australian outback almost four years earlier had been a nuclear explosion set off by members of the Japanese doomsday cult Aum Shinrikyo.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “It is a curious feature of our existance that we come from a planet that is very good at promoting life but even better at extinguishing it.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Nearly everyone I talked to had some gruesome story involving a guileless acquaintance who had gone off hiking the trail with high hopes and new boots and come stumbling back two days later with a bobcat attached to his head or dripping blood from an armless sleeve and whispering in a hoarse voice, “Bear!” before sinking into a troubled unconsciousness.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Describing his experience with the sting of an extremely toxic jellyfish, he did something you don’t often see a scientist do: he shivered.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “This is comfortable and clean and familiar. Apart from a tendency among men of a certain age to wear knee-high socks with shorts, these people are just like you and me.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Elizabethans were as free with their handwriting as they were with their spelling. Handbooks of handwriting suggested up to twenty different – often very different – ways of shaping particular letters.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “For the first 99.99999 per cent of our history as organisms, we were in the same ancestral line as chimpanzees. Virtually nothing is known about the prehistory of chimpanzees, but whatever they were, we were. Then, about seven million years ago, something major happened. A group of new beings emerged from the tropical forests of Africa and began to move about on the open savanna. These.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “The day when people once again die from the scratch of a rose thorn may not be far away.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “The one word that Newfoundland has given the world is penguin. No one has any idea what inspired it.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “The youth of Idaho falls should be encouraged to take drugs in order to cope up with the fact that there is plutonium in their drinking water.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Whatever prompted life to begin, it happened just once. That is the most extraordinary fact in biology, perhaps the most extraordinary fact we know.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “I think it’s only right that crazy people should have their own city, but I cannot for the life of me see why a sane person would want to go there.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “I passed the time browsing in the windows of the many tourists shops that stand along it, reflecting on what a lot of things the Scots have given the world – kilts, bagpipes, tam-o’-shanters, tins of oatcakes, bright yellow sweaters with big diamond patterns, sacks of haggis – and how little anyone but a Scot would want them. Let.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “They can tell us not only what Shakespeare wrote but what he read. Geoffrey Bullough devoted a lifetime, nearly, to tracking down all possible sources for virtually everything mentioned in Shakespeare, producing eight volumes of devoted exposition revealing not only what Shakespeare knew but precisely how he knew it.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “We live in a world that doesn’t altogether seem to want us here.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “I just use my life story as a kind of device on which to hang comic observations. It’s not my interest or instinct to tell the world anything pertinent about myself or my family.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Geologists are never at a loss for paperweights.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “We were idiots really, but awfully happy, too.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Stephen Hawking has observed with a touch of understandable excitement, that one cannot “predict future events exactly if one cannot even measure the present state of the universe precisely!”
Bill Bryson Quote: “The Pacific is about a foot and a half higher along its western edge – a consequence of the centrifugal force created by the Earth’s spin. Just as when you pull on a tub of water the water tends to flow toward the other end, as if reluctant to come with you, so the eastward spin of Earth piles water up against the ocean’s western margins.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “We have body clocks not just in the brain but all over – in our pancreas, liver, heart, kidneys, fatty tissue, muscle, virtually everywhere – and these operate to their own timetables, dictating when hormones are released or organs are busiest or most relaxed. Your reflexes, for instance, are at their sharpest in mid-afternoon, while blood pressure peaks toward evening. Men tend to pump more testosterone early in the morning than later in the day.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “All the things that are part of your heritage make you British – that makes this country what it is. It’s part of your history. And here, unlike America, it’s still living history.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “There’s something satisfying, I think,” Evans said, “about the idea of light travelling for millions of years through space and just at the right moment as it reaches Earth someone looks at the right bit of sky and sees it.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “As Siddhartha Mukherjee observed in The Gene: An Intimate History, humans don’t actually reproduce at all.8 Geckos reproduce; we recombine.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “It occurred to me, not for the first time, that if Britain is ever to sort itself out, it is going to require a lot of euthanasia.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “You may find that your parents are the most delightful people, but you don’t want to live with them.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Science has been quite embattled. It’s the most important thing there is. An arts graduate is not going to fix global warming. They may do other valuable things, but they are not going to fix the planet or cure cancer or get rid of malaria.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “I can think of two very good reasons for not splitting an infinitive. 1. Because you feel that the rules of English ought to conform to the grammatical precepts of a language that died a thousand years ago. 2. Because you wish to cling to a pointless affectation of usage that is without the support of any recognized authority of the last 200 years, even at the cost of composing sentences that are ambiguous, inelegant, and patently contorted.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “In ways that we have barely begun to understand, trillions upon trillions of reflexive chemical reactions add up to a mobile, thinking, decision-making you – or, come to that, a rather less reflective but still incredibly organized dung beetle. Every living thing, never forget, is a wonder of atomic engineering.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “The biggest component in any human, filling 61 percent of available space, is oxygen. It may seem a touch counterintuitive that we are almost two-thirds composed of an odorless gas.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Experimentation without mathematical explanation is blind; mathematical explanation without experimentation is empty.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “I always wanted to do a baseball book; I love baseball. The problem is that a very large part of my following is in non-baseball playing countries.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “In the morning I awoke early and experienced that sinking sensation that overcomes you when you first open your eyes and realize that instead of a normal day ahead of you, with its scatterings of simple gratifications, you are going to have a day without even the tiniest of pleasures; you are going to drive across Ohio.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “People in New York go to Calcutta to get some relief from begging.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Pain is full of paradoxes. Its most self-evident characteristic is that it hurts–that’s what it is there for, after all–but sometimes pain feels slightly wonderful: when your muscles ache after a long run, say, or when you slide into a bath that is at once unbearably hot but also, somehow, deliciously not.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “When I asked her once why she didn’t walk to the gym and do five minutes less on the treadmill, she looked at me as if I were being willfully provocative. “Because I have a program for the treadmill,” she explained. “It records my distance and speed, and I can adjust it for degree of difficulty.” It hadn’t occurred to me how thoughtlessly deficient nature is in this regard.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “22 million tonnes of such unwanted fish are dumped back in the sea each year, mostly in the form of corpses.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “As Herman Melville put it: “We are not so much a nation as a world.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “It was an odd situation. For a century and a half, men got rid of their own hair, which was perfectly comfortable, and instead covered their heads with something foreign and uncomfortable. Very often it was actually their own hair made into a wig. People who couldn’t afford wigs tried to make their hair look like a wig.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Instead, we were given the period of unusual tranquillity known as the Holocene, the time in which we live now.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “Indeed, it has been suggested that there isn’t a single bit of any of us – not so much as a stray molecule8 – that was part of us nine years ago. It may not feel like it, but at the cellular level we are all youngsters.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “The one known cure for baldness is castration.”
Bill Bryson Quote: “I suppose – I was on a long flight across the Pacific, staring idly out the window at moonlit ocean, when it occurred to me with a certain uncomfortable forcefulness that I didn’t know the first thing about the only planet I was ever going to live on.”
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