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Top 35 Catherine Gildiner Quotes (2025 Update)

Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Whatever role we are loved for in our family, we will continue to enact it, despite the toll it takes.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “People who don’t feel pain can’t feel joy.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “The only thing I do know is that when your mother labels you negatively, you believe her – for who else forms your self-image?”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Every life is a piece of art put together with all means available.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “The definition of insanity is doing something over and over again and expecting different results.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Anger is not a feeling; it’s a defence. When you can’t acknowledge your true feelings because they’re too excruciating, you defend against them with anger.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “The big fish ate the little and that was how it worked. To me that.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Remember, you’re bruised but not broken.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Workaholism is another compulsion – you work because you feel anxious when you’re not working. Some psychologists see it as an addiction, and certainly our modern culture has glorified it. It’s not unusual to hear people say proudly that they do nothing but work. Substitute another addiction in that sentence – “I do nothing but drink,” say – and it doesn’t sound so virtuous.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “The big fish ate the little and.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Patients who were rarely praised as children, often distrust the positive things people say about them as adults. A child’s concept of self is formed in childhood and it takes a long time with many affirmative examples to turn that self-concept around.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “I know what the word stress means but I don’t know exactly how it feels. I don’t think I have it. I just keep on keeping on, surrounded by the village idiots.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Making psychological changes also provokes anxiety. It’s very hard to break a habit, especially when you’ve adapted yourself to a particular pattern that, however maladaptive, has kept you alive. The unconscious is powerful, and it will fight to the death to keep an old pattern in place.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “The second revelation occurred when her unconscious released the idea, or the false belief, that her mother would love her only if she were totally perfect. Of course, that wasn’t true. Her mother was incapable of loving her, and being perfect wouldn’t alter that fact. That insight helped to free Madeline from trying so hard to please her mother.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “One thing I know is that we all do things we’re ashamed of. Shame erupts when you violate some taboo. Anyone who says they haven’t suffered shame either hasn’t lived or else is lying.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “First was shock, second was apathy, and third was depersonalization and moral deformity. Frankl makes the point that only those who gave their life meaning did well. He points out that in every situation, there is always freedom of choice, even in extreme suffering.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “The ego – one’s sense of self – is an abstract concept; it’s hard to define it concretely. Picture it as a house built brick by brick. It protects you from the stresses of the outside world, providing a metaphorical home to shelter in – a safe place.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “True narcissists, like Charlotte, never think they’re wrong. When they react by lashing out, they’re convinced that they’re simply defending themselves against some nefarious provocation from someone trying to harm them. When they feel threatened, they go into overdrive and retaliate quickly. Narcissism can be described as a trigger-happy defence.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Laura, you’re demanding that I act like the parent you had, the man who was uninterested in your pain. You’re used to no one responding to your sadness, but I don’t want that role. Right now I feel in a bind.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Shame is a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by behaviour that is somehow taboo in our society. Freud says shame makes you feel you won’t be loved. Shame is much more pernicious than guilt. While guilt is a painful feeling about your actions, shame is much more psychologically destructive because it’s a bad feeling about yourself as a person.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “When people share their feelings, they feel better, less stressed and less anxious. If you plan on having a life partner, it’s emotional intimacy that will be the glue that holds you together long after the physical intimacy fades.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Why have boundaries if everyone is going to drive through them, leaving nothing but rubble? No one’s going to do what I want. Why should they?” Laura had just perfectly defined powerlessness, and powerlessness in a relationship is one of the main causes of stress or anxiety.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Konrad Lorenz, a zoologist, pointed out – and this is part of what won him a Nobel Prize – that attachment can be understood within an evolutionary context in that the mother provides safety for the infant. Attachment is adaptive, enhancing the infant’s chance of survival, and is therefore hard-wired into the brain. A baby needs to be held, loved, and cuddled by the mother.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “One of the Indigenous healers I consulted in the first year of the case had said to me, “An Indian has to be an Indian, or he’s hollow.” Thirty years later, in 2018, the Indigenous American writer Tommy Orange wrote in his novel There There, “It’s important that he dress like an Indian, dance like an Indian, even if it is an act, even if he feels like a fraud the whole time, because the only way to be Indian in this world is to look and act like an Indian.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “In therapy, when pathological defenses start to crumble, the patient lets in more material from their background that they’ve been defending against. Suddenly, memories emerge that were unavailable at the beginning of the therapy. When Laura had been intent on defending her father, she’d blocked many of her negative memories of him; but now, after two years of therapy, those painful memories began to flow like hot lava.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “It was possible, I told her, that so much of her immune system was fighting stress that there was nothing left to fight the herpes virus.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Intimacy is a hard language to learn, especially if it’s been discouraged. But you’ve done it.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Laura had been victimized, but she never took on the victim role. That was what was so heroic about her. Even though she’d been fighting for many years, she got up every day determined to better herself.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “When you go from fearing your mother to feeling sorry for her, it usually means you’ve travelled a long way toward recovery.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Intimacy is when you’re familiar with your emotions, then share your feelings, your fears, your shame, your hopes and joys with another person.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “True insights happen only when the therapist gets out of the way so that the patient is able to gain his or her own psychological knowledge.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Effective therapy is about lowering your defences so that you can deal with the issues that arise in your life.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “There are times when we’ve had to decide to change or remain the same. Will we be slaves to safe, mundane routines or break out and remake our lives the way we imagine them to be? Real change may entail risk, pain, probably anxiety, and hard work, but it’s a way “to be” versus not being. We’ve all been heroes or cowards in our own narratives, depending on the occasion and the choices we’ve made.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Parents who instill a solid work ethic in their children are certainly doing them a favour, but this was different. Charlotte’s cruel perfectionism didn’t foster a healthy work ethic; instead, it promoted workaholic behaviour. And workaholism is another compulsion – you work because you feel anxious when you’re not working. Some psychologists see it as an addiction, and certainly our modern culture has glorified it. It’s not unusual to hear people say proudly that they do nothing but work.”
Catherine Gildiner Quote: “Failure is built into that plan.”
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