Top 200 Charlaine Harris Quotes (2024 Update)
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51. “His eyes were still like caves with ghosts dwelling in their depths.”

— Charlaine Harris

52. “It was beautiful Eric, who desired me, who was hungry for me, in a world that often let me know it could do very well without me.”

— Charlaine Harris

53. “Vampires. They wrote the book on possessive.”

— Charlaine Harris

54. “They say when one door shuts, another one opens. But they haven’t been living at my house. Most of the doors I open seem to have something scary crouched behind them, anyway.”

— Charlaine Harris

55. “And since I’m going to be in the neighborhood, you thought I might do as an escort? To an orgy?”

— Charlaine Harris

56. “What had set the fae world off? I’d never seen one. Now you couldn’t throw a trowel without hitting a fairy.”

— Charlaine Harris

57. “The average woman would not be pondering how fast her date could kill her, but I’ll never be an average woman.”

— Charlaine Harris

58. “If I quit having fun, then it’s time for me to quit working.”

— Charlaine Harris

59. “Least said soonest meanded.”

— Charlaine Harris

60. “Somewhere, somewhere in this house, lurked a problem. For some reason, Jane’s legacy wasn’t entirely benevolent.”

— Charlaine Harris

61. “Easy to exemplify my true feelings towards him.”

— Charlaine Harris

62. “What are you, Zen Master Fang?”

— Charlaine Harris

63. “Angelic Sookie, vision of love and beauty, I am prostrate that the wicked evil maenad violated your smooth and voluptuous body, in an attempt to deliver a message to me. -Eric.”

— Charlaine Harris

64. “Vampires often turn on those who trust them. We don’t have human values, you know.” “A lot of humans turn on those who trust them,” I pointed out. I can be practical. “I’m not a total fool.”

— Charlaine Harris

65. “I often cried when I got angry; I hated that. Crying just made you look weak, no matter what triggered it.”

— Charlaine Harris

66. “For awhile I taped soap operas and watched them at night when I thought I might be forgetting what it was like to be human. After a while I stopped, because from the examples I saw on those shows, forgetting humanity was a good thing.”

— Charlaine Harris

67. “Sometimes, instead of going down the road less taken, you just charge down the beaten path.”

— Charlaine Harris

68. “Come on, lover, let’s have a look,” Eric said, giving me a quick kiss. He jumped off the back porch with me still attached to him – like a large barnacle.”

— Charlaine Harris

69. “Oh, God, puppy dog eyes. From a six-foot-five ancient Viking vampire.”

— Charlaine Harris

70. “Fiction just makes it all more interesting. Truth is so boring.”

— Charlaine Harris

71. “Most humans were on one big island, to the fairies, and that island was adrift on a sea called I Totally Don’t Care.”

— Charlaine Harris

72. “There’s no way you can kill someone and get to the other side of the experience unchanged.”

— Charlaine Harris

73. “It must be one of the worst things in the world, to see your child revealed as a selfish little sadist.”

— Charlaine Harris

74. “Despite the failure of Velda Cannon’s Depends, we’d had a great time.”

— Charlaine Harris

75. “I so seldom had to dispose of a human body myself, I was at a loss. Fairies turned into dust, and vampires flaked away. Demons had to be burned. Humans were very troublesome.”

— Charlaine Harris

76. “Men sometimes have to leave their ladies alone, and ladies are not responsible for the bad manners of fools.”

— Charlaine Harris

77. “The air was cold and wet, and if you stood still for a moment the chilling damp would creep into your bones. I could tell the temperature was taking a deep dive, and the bright sky of the morning was a fond memory. It was an appropriate day to dump a body.”

— Charlaine Harris

78. “It’s a sad comment on humans that none of them are tolerable to one who can read their minds.”

— Charlaine Harris

79. “I don’t write the kind of ‘happily ever after’ that romance readers enjoy.”

— Charlaine Harris

80. “Just because one of Arlene’s husbands was a murderer is no reason for me to be ugly.”

— Charlaine Harris

81. “My brother, Jason, came into the bar, then, and sauntered over to give me a hug. He knows that women like a man who’s good to his family and also kind to the disabled, so hugging me is a double whammy of recommendation.”

— Charlaine Harris

82. “I’ve often wished when I started a book I knew what was going to happen. I talked to writers who write 80-page outlines, and I’m just in awe of that.”

— Charlaine Harris

83. “Look, how come he showed up now? When you have other fairies in the woods? And does that sound crazy when you say it out loud, or what?”

— Charlaine Harris

84. “The vampire is not a bad man, and he loves you.”

— Charlaine Harris

85. “No, I like you alive and warm and wiggling.”

— Charlaine Harris

86. “I had two cups of coffee, put Eric’s jeans in the washer, read a romance for awhile, and studied my brand-new Word of the Day calendar, a Christmas gift from Arlene. My first word of the New Year was ‘exsanguinate.’ This was probably not a good omen.”

— Charlaine Harris

87. “But in my book, it was basically bad taste to stare at someone’s assets, no matter how much on display they were.”

— Charlaine Harris

88. “I held on to my better nature by my fingernails but I held on.”

— Charlaine Harris

89. “It was somehow degrading, craving someone so... voraciously – another good calendar word – just because he was physically beautiful. I hadn’t thought that was something women did, either.”

— Charlaine Harris

90. “I was surprised to find out there was a direct line from my palm to my, my, hootchie.”

— Charlaine Harris

91. “A dog – a collie – went up to Eric, looked up at his face, and growled. “Shoo,” Eric said, making an imperious gesture with his hand.”

— Charlaine Harris

92. “Appius Livius Ocella made mistakes in his whole long existence. Perhaps changing Eric was his finest hour. He created the perfect vampire. Eric’s only flaw is you.”

— Charlaine Harris

93. “Though I was standing in front of a mirror, I wasn’t really seeing my reflection. I was seeing, very clearly, that – at the moment – I was all in the world that Eric could think of as his own. I had better not fail him.”

— Charlaine Harris

94. “Not since the dark days of the Twilight franchise had it been so trendy to be dead.”

— Charlaine Harris

95. “I abjure you,” Alcide said. Colonel Flood winced, and young Sid, Amanda, and Culpepper looked both astonished and impressed, as if this were a ceremony they’d never thought to witness. “I see you no longer. I hunt with you no longer. I share flesh with you no longer.”

— Charlaine Harris

96. “I gripped the stapler even harder and felt like a fool planning to battle a crazy man with a stapler that even, I suddenly remembered, contained no staples. Well, strike that line of defense.”

— Charlaine Harris

97. “I think it’s ‘only polite’ that my wife should let me know when she’s entertaining a male visitor, furthermore one that has shared her bed.”

— Charlaine Harris

98. “He looked like he’d just seen the Ghost of You Better Shut Your Mouth...”

— Charlaine Harris

99. “The Sookie Stackhouse novels were selling well before the TV show, but the TV show led to a lot more exposure and readers. And a lot went on to read my other work. It was a wonderful thing for my bank account.”

— Charlaine Harris

100. “Very few of my characters are totally heroic or totally villainous.”

— Charlaine Harris