Top 120 Chris Hardwick Quotes (2024 Update)
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51. “My father was one of the greatest professional bowlers of all time. Seriously. Billy Hardwick: PBA Hall of Fame, Player of the Year in ’63 and ’69, and the first winner of the triple crown of bowling, among other things.”

— Chris Hardwick

52. “I don’t know if I’m a Twitter addict. That seems kind of harsh. I would say it’s more that I’m seriously involved. That it’s a long-term relationship – like a girlfriend, which my actual girlfriend loves to hear.”

— Chris Hardwick

53. “Our mandate at Nerdist is that we only get involved with nice people around things that we love. We have the luxury of being in the demographic that we’re programming for.”

— Chris Hardwick

54. “Jokes that make me laugh out loud when I write them almost always bomb. I have no idea why.”

— Chris Hardwick

55. “You can’t throw money at the Internet to make it work – it really is all about the quality of the content.”

— Chris Hardwick

56. “Both my parents recognized early on that I wanted to do something in comedy, and they were really supportive. They’re the ones who bought me Steve Martin records and let me watch R-rated comedies long before they probably should have.”

— Chris Hardwick

57. “Comic-Con is nerd Christmas. People go wanting to have fun.”

— Chris Hardwick

58. “It changed my whole outlook. I lost a decade to self-pity, and the next thing I knew I was turning 40.”

— Chris Hardwick

59. “Every year on my birthday, I start a new playlist titled after my current age so I can keep track of my favorite songs of the year as a sort of musical diary because I am a teenage girl.”

— Chris Hardwick

60. “My mom is a big sports fans. Basketball, football, baseball, whatever. She calls into sports radio shows and gets into shouting matches, that’s how intense she is about it.”

— Chris Hardwick

61. “A big company is like trying to steer a luxury liner.”

— Chris Hardwick

62. “I’m fascinated by people’s process. Everyone’s process is a little bit different, and just to see the different paths that people take to get where they are is really interesting to me.”

— Chris Hardwick

63. “Are you a passenger on a ghost ship or are you the pilot?”

— Chris Hardwick

64. “We didn’t understand irony yet in the ’80s; we just kind of existed at face value, so there was no nerd cool yet because the digital revolution was still in its infancy.”

— Chris Hardwick

65. “Every time I finish a record, it’s sort of feels like, “I can’t believe that I’m hanging out and having a conversation, and people are gonna listen to this.” It’s an odd thing, but it’s really cool.”

— Chris Hardwick

66. “I had a personal blog, but why does anyone care that I went shopping for hats?”

— Chris Hardwick

67. “In the ’90s, you couldn’t say the word ‘nerd’ to someone when pitching a show. They would have considered that too niche and wouldn’t have listened.”

— Chris Hardwick

68. “Comedy has sort of been my life-long obsession. I literally obsessed over comedy. I really didn’t play sports – for me it was just comedy, computers and chess club; those were my big things.”

— Chris Hardwick

69. “One of the many reasons why I love stand-up so much is when you’re performing, you get instant feedback. You know if stuff is working right away.”

— Chris Hardwick

70. “Being constructively critical is good, as long as your purpose is to improve your methods for future endeavors. Lying in bed and replaying failures and telling yourself you’re stupid is a tremendous disservice to your efforts and what you can offer the world.”

— Chris Hardwick

71. “I think some of what makes it a good podcast is that it’s organic. It doesn’t feel forced. If we can say anything about ours, it’s that we’re not faking it at all. We’re genuinely interested in the people that we’re talking to.”

— Chris Hardwick

72. “The podcast movement was really a creative survival mechanism for standup comics.”

— Chris Hardwick

73. “Mainstream culture is like your mom: It’s always a little late to catch on and gets easily confused by technology, but it means well.”

— Chris Hardwick

74. “Steve Martin said that philosophy is good for comedy because it screws up your thinking just enough, and I agree with that. Being forced to see life’s metadata is good training for looking for interesting angles on a topic.”

— Chris Hardwick

75. “I’m just gonna do a podcast because it’s mine, I can control it, I have complete responsibility over it, and no one can touch it.”

— Chris Hardwick

76. “When comedians get successful, the fans that they have aren’t the fans they would hang out with. I don’t have that problem.”

— Chris Hardwick

77. “For me personally, I have a fear of, ‘If I stop, I’m going to die.’ If I stop doing the things that are enriching to me or creatively exciting to me or if I stop creating, then I feel stagnant. If something isn’t growing, it’s dying.”

— Chris Hardwick

78. “Be offended by everything or be offended by nothing.”

— Chris Hardwick

79. “I don’t know if the podcast as a medium will ever have the cultural impact that TV and movies do. It may never be super-mainstream.”

— Chris Hardwick

80. “Twitter is basically text messaging. Twitter is a guy you can always elbow in the side and say, “Hey, look, a guy in a clown suit just threw up!” And I don’t have 400-800 words to say about that, I just wanted to say that one thing.”

— Chris Hardwick

81. “I spent a lot of time bowling as a kid, mostly because I grew up in bowling alleys. They were kind of my playgrounds.”

— Chris Hardwick

82. “Twitter is really a hyper-distilled version of how the internet should work – short bursts of relatively useful information.”

— Chris Hardwick

83. “You don’t need 30 million people to listen to your podcast. If 10,000 people listen to your podcast, which is not a hard number to achieve, then 10,000 people are listening, and you can build a community, and literally change the world just recording into a microphone.”

— Chris Hardwick

84. “I dated around some, but I’ve always been a serial monogamist. I don’t know how people date around a lot, and not want to stab themselves in the face with a sharp object.”

— Chris Hardwick

85. “There’s not many a man who would get shot and then come visit the family responsible.”

— Chris Hardwick

86. “The nerds provide the toys that distract the morons. So the nerds are sort of the new drug-dealers. We’re the drug dealers of the 21st century because we provide all the brain candy for the mouth-breathers, for lack of a better word.”

— Chris Hardwick

87. “I do seem like the kind of guy who’d be obsessive about Rubik’s Cubes.”

— Chris Hardwick

88. “I probably get one or two days off every five or six weeks.”

— Chris Hardwick

89. “Stand-up for me is usually a weekend thing. I go out of town and just do it.”

— Chris Hardwick

90. “I do lots of crowd work in my set, because I enjoy writing material through riffing and conversation.”

— Chris Hardwick

91. “With stand-up, there’s a little bit of an exaggerated reality because things have to be manipulated to create comedy, to create jokes.”

— Chris Hardwick

92. “I think doing the podcast may have been one of the best career decisions I’ve ever made in my life.”

— Chris Hardwick

93. “I’ve been out of work so many times in my life that relying too much on just one job is terrifying.”

— Chris Hardwick

94. “I hate to say it, but because of humanity’s capitalistic nature, money is important.”

— Chris Hardwick

95. “If you do a joke that’s really old, then what happens is people on Reddit and Twitter just go, ‘Real original, you’re just doing old jokes!’ But bands do it all the time.”

— Chris Hardwick

96. “Real philosophy is like trying to read an alarm system installation manual in Korean.”

— Chris Hardwick

97. “I think when I look out and I see there’s so much negativity in the world and a lot of people are unhappy and a lot people are anxious, it just feels like that’s one view of the world. But you don’t have to always focus on that view of the world.”

— Chris Hardwick

98. “When you hang around a lot of comedians long enough, you realize there’s a certain gene, in every comedian. It’s why we get hyper-analytical about things.”

— Chris Hardwick

99. “I think the mistake a lot of people make with new media is they just focus on one thing. But any one thing – just doing podcasts or just having a website or just doing television – isn’t enough anymore.”

— Chris Hardwick

100. “If I wasn’t acting or doing stand-up, I would be in animation. Or if I had the discipline I might studies physics.”

— Chris Hardwick