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Top 25 Christian Finnegan Quotes (2025 Update)

Christian Finnegan Quote: “Canada, or as i call them, America Light.”

1. “Canada, or as i call them, America Light.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “Relationships are a lot like yard sales. They look really fun from a couple hundred feet away, but eventually you realize it’s just a bunch of crap you don’t need.”

2. “Relationships are a lot like yard sales. They look really fun from a couple hundred feet away, but eventually you realize it’s just a bunch of crap you don’t need.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “The thing is – I’m not an idiot. I’m rather intelligent, as proven by the fact that I just used the word ‘rather’ in a sentence.”

3. “The thing is – I’m not an idiot. I’m rather intelligent, as proven by the fact that I just used the word ‘rather’ in a sentence.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “People might say, What’s so great about the Arctic Monkeys? I’ve never even seen them. Well, you’ve never seen God either. You’re gonna tell me he’s not awesome?”

4. “People might say, What’s so great about the Arctic Monkeys? I’ve never even seen them. Well, you’ve never seen God either. You’re gonna tell me he’s not awesome?”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “I’m not an alcoholic. I just drink that way.”

5. “I’m not an alcoholic. I just drink that way.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “You know what I’m great at? Trivial Pursuit. What good is that gonna do you in life? It has the word ‘trivial’ in the name. The game is basically telling you that you pursue trivial things. Trivial – as in not important. Trivial – as in maybe you should’ve gone to grad school.”

6. “You know what I’m great at? Trivial Pursuit. What good is that gonna do you in life? It has the word ‘trivial’ in the name. The game is basically telling you that you pursue trivial things. Trivial – as in not important. Trivial – as in maybe you should’ve gone to grad school.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “Do me a favor, guys. Don’t drink so much that you become the guy that goes into the bathroom and moans while taking a leak. See, the women in the room, they might not know what we’re talking about; every dude knows.”

7. “Do me a favor, guys. Don’t drink so much that you become the guy that goes into the bathroom and moans while taking a leak. See, the women in the room, they might not know what we’re talking about; every dude knows.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “Michael Jackson’s charity efforts? Mmm. I’m sure they have nothing to do with his molestation charges.”

8. “Michael Jackson’s charity efforts? Mmm. I’m sure they have nothing to do with his molestation charges.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “If I could go back and talk to the me who was just starting to do comedy, I would have told myself to relax and not worry about things happening right away. That’s a mistake a lot of people make – they think a year is a long time and it’s really not.”

9. “If I could go back and talk to the me who was just starting to do comedy, I would have told myself to relax and not worry about things happening right away. That’s a mistake a lot of people make – they think a year is a long time and it’s really not.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “The Smurf village was destroyed weeks ago and Bush has still not made an appearance. George Bush doesn’t care about tiny blue people.”

10. “The Smurf village was destroyed weeks ago and Bush has still not made an appearance. George Bush doesn’t care about tiny blue people.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “If you refuse to see Superman Returns this summer, what you’re saying about yourself is: I heart Al Qaeda.”

11. “If you refuse to see Superman Returns this summer, what you’re saying about yourself is: I heart Al Qaeda.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “I joined a gym recently. I don’t have the best history in the world of sticking with my fitness regimens, but I feel like this time’s gonna be different. I figure one of two things is gonna happen: either I’ll get into shape, or I’ll just resign myself to paying an $85 a month fat tax.”

12. “I joined a gym recently. I don’t have the best history in the world of sticking with my fitness regimens, but I feel like this time’s gonna be different. I figure one of two things is gonna happen: either I’ll get into shape, or I’ll just resign myself to paying an $85 a month fat tax.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “Jesus is a powerful guy in Hollywood. Not quite as powerful as Vin Diesel, but powerful.”

13. “Jesus is a powerful guy in Hollywood. Not quite as powerful as Vin Diesel, but powerful.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “America may be entering it’s Michael Jordan on the Wizards period.”

14. “America may be entering it’s Michael Jordan on the Wizards period.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “You rarely hear anyone use the word pancreas in a not-horrible context.”

15. “You rarely hear anyone use the word pancreas in a not-horrible context.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “If you purchased the latest Joss Stone CD, what you’re saying is that you’re an employee of VH1.”

16. “If you purchased the latest Joss Stone CD, what you’re saying is that you’re an employee of VH1.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “The thing is, I hate political comedy. I personally loathe it.”

17. “The thing is, I hate political comedy. I personally loathe it.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “Some of you guys must have real jobs – office jobs. Anybody? By a show of broken spirits.”

18. “Some of you guys must have real jobs – office jobs. Anybody? By a show of broken spirits.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “I was told by a physician to avoid any line of work where people need to, um, depend on me for anything.”

19. “I was told by a physician to avoid any line of work where people need to, um, depend on me for anything.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “I really respect peple who try. People who say, No, I’m actually going to do the best I can. That said, you want to do the best you can while remaining who you are.”

20. “I really respect peple who try. People who say, No, I’m actually going to do the best I can. That said, you want to do the best you can while remaining who you are.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “There comes a point where the disappointments in your life accrue faster than you can find external forces to blame them on.”

21. “There comes a point where the disappointments in your life accrue faster than you can find external forces to blame them on.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “I think I speak for America when I say, nothing says NASCAR like Whoopi Goldberg.”

22. “I think I speak for America when I say, nothing says NASCAR like Whoopi Goldberg.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “Basically, I got into stand-up because I’m too egocentric to be an actor and not disciplined enough to be a writer.”

23. “Basically, I got into stand-up because I’m too egocentric to be an actor and not disciplined enough to be a writer.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “I haven’t had a drink in twelve days and I’ve gotta say, I’m pretty shocked at how boring people are.”

24. “I haven’t had a drink in twelve days and I’ve gotta say, I’m pretty shocked at how boring people are.”

— Christian Finnegan

Christian Finnegan Quote: “If think the pig was terrified because he was fully aware that after segment he was going to be fed to Al Roker.”

25. “If think the pig was terrified because he was fully aware that after segment he was going to be fed to Al Roker.”

— Christian Finnegan

Motivational Quotes

Motivational Quotes

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Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

Positive Quotes

Positive Quotes

Albert Einstein Quotes

Albert Einstein Quotes

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Motivational Quotes

INSPIRATIONAL SUCCESS MOTIVATIONAL

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

ENTREPRENEURSHIP BUSINESS INSPIRATIONAL

Positive Quotes

Positive Quotes

Albert Einstein Quotes

Albert Einstein Quotes

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Steve Jobs Quotes

Steve Jobs Quotes

ENTREPRENEURSHIP BUSINESS APPLE

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Inspirational Quotes

COURAGE MOTIVATIONAL STRENGTH

INSPIRATIONAL SUCCESS MOTIVATIONAL

Swami Vivekananda Quotes

Swami Vivekananda Quotes

LIFE SPIRITUALITY

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