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Top 25 Christopher Buckley Quotes (2025 Update)

Christopher Buckley Quote: “That’s the beauty of argument, if you argue correctly, you’re never wrong.”

1. “That’s the beauty of argument, if you argue correctly, you’re never wrong.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Who needs evidence when you’ve got the Internet?”

2. “Who needs evidence when you’ve got the Internet?”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Once they’re both gone, your parents’ house instantly turns into a museum.”

3. “Once they’re both gone, your parents’ house instantly turns into a museum.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “The best advice on writing I’ve ever received was from William Zinsser: ‘Be grateful for every word you can cut.’”

4. “The best advice on writing I’ve ever received was from William Zinsser: ‘Be grateful for every word you can cut.’”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “One realization does dawn upon the death of the second parent, namely that you’ve now moved into the green room to the River Styx. You’re next.”

5. “One realization does dawn upon the death of the second parent, namely that you’ve now moved into the green room to the River Styx. You’re next.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “People believe unbelievable things because it’s self-flattering to think that you are intellectually daring enough to accept what others find preposterous.”

6. “People believe unbelievable things because it’s self-flattering to think that you are intellectually daring enough to accept what others find preposterous.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “E-mails are the new herpes: You never get rid of them.”

7. “E-mails are the new herpes: You never get rid of them.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Christopher Hitchens is the greatest living essayist in the English language.”

8. “Christopher Hitchens is the greatest living essayist in the English language.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Ronald Reagan used to say that the nine scariest words in the English language were ‘I’m from the government, and I’m here to help.”

9. “Ronald Reagan used to say that the nine scariest words in the English language were ‘I’m from the government, and I’m here to help.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “There is no point in arguing if you are not susceptible to reason. Embrace your cynicism. Hug it.”

10. “There is no point in arguing if you are not susceptible to reason. Embrace your cynicism. Hug it.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Nothing raises the national temperature more than a VACANCY sign hanging from the colonnaded front of the Supreme Court.”

11. “Nothing raises the national temperature more than a VACANCY sign hanging from the colonnaded front of the Supreme Court.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “How many times had those awful words – “I know what I’m doing” – been uttered throughout history as prelude to disaster?”

12. “How many times had those awful words – “I know what I’m doing” – been uttered throughout history as prelude to disaster?”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Speechwriters are fundamentally Calvinist: They become nervous if their principals exhibit free will and depart from the prepared text.”

13. “Speechwriters are fundamentally Calvinist: They become nervous if their principals exhibit free will and depart from the prepared text.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “You could drink hard liquor in the middle of a school day without people assuming you were an alcoholic underachiever. Strange how in America in the 1950s, at the height of its industrial and imperial power, men drank double-martinis for lunch. Now, in its decline, they drank fizzy water. Somewhere something had gone terribly wrong.”

14. “You could drink hard liquor in the middle of a school day without people assuming you were an alcoholic underachiever. Strange how in America in the 1950s, at the height of its industrial and imperial power, men drank double-martinis for lunch. Now, in its decline, they drank fizzy water. Somewhere something had gone terribly wrong.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Oil they would buy from anyone. From Satan.”

15. “Oil they would buy from anyone. From Satan.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “You never remember who came to the funeral, but you never forget who didn’t.”

16. “You never remember who came to the funeral, but you never forget who didn’t.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “It’s the fate of many propositions,” Terry said, “to begin as heresies and end as truths. I read that somewhere, anyway.”

17. “It’s the fate of many propositions,” Terry said, “to begin as heresies and end as truths. I read that somewhere, anyway.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Justices look solemn in their formal black robes, but every so often they like to have a little fun by taking on a strange case, or overturning a presidential election, that sort of thing.”

18. “Justices look solemn in their formal black robes, but every so often they like to have a little fun by taking on a strange case, or overturning a presidential election, that sort of thing.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “I was an only child with a lot of time to kill. I suspect a lot of writers are only children, or only children become writers because it’s a way of being alone.”

19. “I was an only child with a lot of time to kill. I suspect a lot of writers are only children, or only children become writers because it’s a way of being alone.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “In our corrupt times, the virtue of a Pontiff is commended when he does not surpass the wickedness of other men. – Francesco Guicciardini, History of Italy, 1561.”

20. “In our corrupt times, the virtue of a Pontiff is commended when he does not surpass the wickedness of other men. – Francesco Guicciardini, History of Italy, 1561.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “They embraced and parted. They never saw each other again.”

21. “They embraced and parted. They never saw each other again.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “The vice-president’s tongue is several time zones ahead of his brain.”

22. “The vice-president’s tongue is several time zones ahead of his brain.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Why should you give up God because of gunpowder? Since the world began, God in his wisdom has given us tools with which to slaughter each other. Jawbones of asses. Slings. Swords. Crossbows. Why shouldn’t he give us gunpowder?”

23. “Why should you give up God because of gunpowder? Since the world began, God in his wisdom has given us tools with which to slaughter each other. Jawbones of asses. Slings. Swords. Crossbows. Why shouldn’t he give us gunpowder?”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “In cyberspace, everyone can hear you scream.”

24. “In cyberspace, everyone can hear you scream.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Perhaps, after all, the most beautiful words in the language are I’m sorry.”

25. “Perhaps, after all, the most beautiful words in the language are I’m sorry.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Rudy Giuliani, the president’s former personal attorney, was now living in the Julian Assange suite at the Ecuadorean embassy in London. While changing planes at Heathrow, Rudy was tipped off that the Justice Department had issued a warrant for his arrest for injurious punditry and pernicious legal representation.”

26. “Rudy Giuliani, the president’s former personal attorney, was now living in the Julian Assange suite at the Ecuadorean embassy in London. While changing planes at Heathrow, Rudy was tipped off that the Justice Department had issued a warrant for his arrest for injurious punditry and pernicious legal representation.”

— Christopher Buckley

Christopher Buckley Quote: “Oderint dum metuant.” “You’re going to have to translate that for me. I didn’t go to Gratin.” “It’s Groton. Means ‘Let them hate, so long as they fear.’ Cato.”

27. “Oderint dum metuant.” “You’re going to have to translate that for me. I didn’t go to Gratin.” “It’s Groton. Means ‘Let them hate, so long as they fear.’ Cato.”

— Christopher Buckley

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