Top 30 Chuck Tingle Quotes (2026 Update)

1. “I can feel his mountains and valleys, his rivers and forests, deserts and incredibly toned abs.”

— Chuck Tingle

2. “Suddenly, it all makes sense; the strange way that Domald moves, the green color of his skin, the long neck. Domald Tromp is the Loch Ness Monster.”

— Chuck Tingle

3. “It is a sad but very real truth that there is no future for relationships where spaghetti and chocolate milk does not play a major role.”

— Chuck Tingle

4. “To be honest, however, I’m about ready to switch over to my favorite treat, Christmas blend coffee from Starbutts.”

— Chuck Tingle

5. “For some reason, I find myself looking away, slightly taken aback by the restaurants confident demeanor.”

— Chuck Tingle

6. “We haven’t been blessed by some incredible superpower from the great beyond, we’re just curious. Sometimes that’s all it takes.”

— Chuck Tingle

7. “Our relationship wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows, but it was real. It was misunderstandings and growth and forgiveness and acceptance and, of course, the beauty that comes along with all that. We were so much more than a montage of upbeat music and endless smiles.”

— Chuck Tingle

8. “Suddenly, it all falls into place, like a missing puzzle piece finally connecting in a way that I would’ve never thought possible. I nearly tip backwards in my chair, and I suddenly find myself incredibly aroused. This is the mother of all conspiracy theories, the single point from which all other mysterious ideas emerge. This is much bigger than reverse reverse twins, or wireless 5G void spores, this is everything.”

— Chuck Tingle

9. “It’s almost as if the Bible can be twisted into supporting whatever point of view you want,” I blurt.”

— Chuck Tingle

10. “I just wanted to reiterate conclusively and explicitly in the actual text that Bumbleborn and I are a gay couple,” Grindlebad adds.”

— Chuck Tingle

11. “That acknowledgement could arrive after several decades, or it could happen tonight, but the time will come. Eventually, I’ll have to fully contend with this simple fact: the love I was promised was conditional.”

— Chuck Tingle

12. “TERFs were kicked even deeper into the dumpster where they belong.”

— Chuck Tingle

13. “I now know our survival is not predicted on the conditional help of fair-weathered allies, or even the rock-solid kindness of outsiders who put in the work. We’ve made it this far because of each other.”

— Chuck Tingle

14. “It’s easy to be an ally when you don’t have to give anything up.”

— Chuck Tingle

15. “Rose 15:30. For the righteous sword of truth is so sharp that even half swings will graze a bone of incredible depths.”

— Chuck Tingle

16. “We’ve got trans Mothman, we’ve got a gay goblin, we’ve got bi Mrs. Why.”

— Chuck Tingle

17. “It’s absurd, I know, but trauma has a way of making you second guess even the most fundamental parts of yourself.”

— Chuck Tingle

18. “Rose 7:8. And upon the wicked she shall rain a mighty tempest of fire, smiting those who dared steal away her thoughts, but forgot to quell her vengeance.”

— Chuck Tingle

19. “You can pull out any shred of Scripture to convince yourself the ends justify the means, but if God is this brutal, what’s the point of worshipping him in the first place? If the big guy is really signing off on this torture, then I’m not on His team whether He’s real or not.”

— Chuck Tingle

20. “Religion is more than just faith – it’s faith with a brand.”

— Chuck Tingle

21. “That’s the way I’ve always been. It’s hard for me to see any situation as a whole. I feel like I’m always looking at a mass of moving parts, trying to break every tiny piece of experience down and understand it in a methodical way. It’s beautiful but it’s also difficult to interact with people because they expect me to communicate the whole machine and I’m too distracted by the cogs.”

— Chuck Tingle

22. “You know who the real villain is?” I continue, strolling through the lobby and joining a line of other writers, directors, cinematographers, and actors as they filter inside to find their seats. “Unchecked capitalism and the desire for capitalist systems to monetize other people’s trauma.”

— Chuck Tingle

23. “Rose 11:4. Let there be Rose.”

— Chuck Tingle

24. “Anxiety comes and goes as it pleases.”

— Chuck Tingle

25. “On a long enough timeline, endings are inevitable. Tragedy is inevitable. Fortunately, so is joy.”

— Chuck Tingle

26. “You are trusting your flesh over God. And for what?”

— Chuck Tingle

27. “Night of the Living Dead isn’t really about zombies, it’s about racism. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre is littered with pro-vegetarian subtext, and They Live is more about rampant consumerism than aliens.” “But ghosts aren’t real,” Seth argues. “He wasn’t actually in danger.” “Zombies, Leatherface, and space invaders aren’t real, either,” I counter. “But racism, factory farming, and unchecked corporate greed are.”

— Chuck Tingle

28. “They say you know it’s love when someone offers to drive you to LAX, and right now I’m feeling the love. Most relationships would fall apart if you put them through the high-performance stress test that is currently my life, but for some reason all this tension only serves to make Zeke step up even more. Do I deserve it? Probably not.”

— Chuck Tingle

29. “My conscious mind was ignorant to the fact that I’m gay, but even I knew I was autistic.”

— Chuck Tingle

30. “The same goes for fear, though. You don’t wanna feel that way all the time, but it’s a muscle that needs to be exercised. There are scary things in the world, that’s just a fact, and if you pretend they’re not all around us then you’re in for a rude awakening. Horror offers a chance to recognize this truth, to explore dark places in a safe way.”

— Chuck Tingle

31. “This is the endless dichotomy of existence, I suppose, moments of visceral horror and divine beauty happening all at once to create an impossibly unique thing called life.”

— Chuck Tingle

32. “Rose 1:1–2. She raised a flaming sword, not to rend her heart, but to seal the wound where a heart had been. For those who cast her out did not know this steadfast flame, alight with righteous anger, would never cease until the heavenly kingdom fell.”

— Chuck Tingle

33. “Existence is chaos and there are no answers. Even in statistics, you’re often just hedging your bets...”

— Chuck Tingle

34. “Rose 2:6. And when the morning came she pushed onward, because the wicked and the vile bore down from every side, and onward was the only direction she had left.”

— Chuck Tingle