Top 60 Craig Schaefer Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “Life is nothing but one long string of decisions and consequences. You make your choices; you take your ride.”

— Craig Schaefer

2. “Mob mentality is like wildfire. It spreads fast and hard, and suddenly you find yourself surrounded by really smart people making really bad decisions.”

— Craig Schaefer

3. “You could forge your pain into a sword,” Nyx said, “and persecute your enemies. Triumph. Survive. But fear imprisons you. Fear of breaking rules. Fear of what people will think of you. Petty little fears.”

— Craig Schaefer

4. “The world is full of good men who make bad decisions,” I told her. “Sometimes it works out. Sometimes it doesn’t. You just have to figure things out the best you can. Make the best choices you can. Choices you can live with.”

— Craig Schaefer

5. “I wondered, for a brief instant, what a necromancer like Damien Ecko could do with the skeleton of a T. rex. I shrugged the idea off. Nobody’s that good.”

— Craig Schaefer

6. “I knew a junkie when I saw one, and this guy was a long-term member of the heroin weight-loss program.”

— Craig Schaefer

7. “Agent Black wanted to put Lauren Carmichael in a ten-by-ten prison cell. I had a better idea: a hole out in the desert, three feet wide and six feet deep.”

— Craig Schaefer

8. “I take no pleasure in your pain,” Xiulang said, “only your severe discomfort. Lines must be drawn.”

— Craig Schaefer

9. “Well hello,” Caitlin said, eyeing the shepherd. “The last time I saw you, you were wearing your heart on your sleeve. Because I ripped it out and put it there.”

— Craig Schaefer

10. “They were the gangster version of the guards at Buckingham Palace.”

— Craig Schaefer

11. “The original games were gladiatorial fights to the death. We had to revise that after a few years because, well, people stopped signing up.”

— Craig Schaefer

12. “In a week marred by death and pain, I’d found a single red rose growing in the ruins. I’d take the thorns as they came.”

— Craig Schaefer

13. “When you fight, though, that badge means you’ve gotta keep your gloves on. I don’t. I use brass knuckles.”

— Craig Schaefer

14. “Do you have the soul? Where is it now?” she asked, a little too urgently for my liking. “Stashed someplace safe,” I told her. That someplace was the trunk of my car parked out in the driveway, but I didn’t feel like sharing that much.”

— Craig Schaefer

15. “Seems to me you’ve got two choices: one, you can get in a gunfight with the United States government – because that always ends well – or you can run downstairs, get as many of your boys out through the emergency exits as you can, and order the rest to surrender. Your call, but bail money’s a lot cheaper than a tombstone.”

— Craig Schaefer

16. “She didn’t see the Lady in Red standing silently behind her, a faint smile on her lips. Nobody did.”

— Craig Schaefer

17. “It’s never good to owe money to a guy with a cellar full of military hardware. Especially not when he rides with an outlaw biker gang.”

— Craig Schaefer

18. “Did you just make that up? Words mean things. And no. I’m a hacker, not a wizard.”

— Craig Schaefer

19. “Have you ever considered, for even a moment, the list of things I’m not allowed to do because some bitter old men say so? I can’t lead a mass, can’t earn the greens of a priest, let alone claim my birthright. My entire life, from the cradle to the grave, is dictated by ‘traditions’ and rules that you aren’t subject to. My power was taken away from me the moment I was born a woman. So no, you do not get to give me permission to cry!” “I’m.”

— Craig Schaefer

20. “And, uh, could I borrow somebody’s car? Mine’s impounded and I can’t reclaim it because I’m kinda legally dead right now.”

— Craig Schaefer

21. “Of course, the best lies are always wrapped in verifiable truth. It makes the filling easier to swallow.”

— Craig Schaefer

22. “You saved me, too,” I told her. “Sometimes you just can’t do everything alone. And that’s okay.”

— Craig Schaefer

23. “Nobody answered. I put my thumb on the hammer of my gun and cocked it back. A meaningless gesture on most modern pistols, but thanks to Hollywood it got the point across. “I’ve got four hostages here, and I only need one. If I don’t have an answer in five seconds, we start making staff cuts.”

— Craig Schaefer

24. “You can’t take a life – good or bad, whether they’ve got it coming or not – you can’t take a life without burning out a little of the light in your heart. And you’ve only got so much light.”

— Craig Schaefer

25. “But what about objectivity? Aren’t we supposed to report both sides of the story?” “You’re assuming there are two valid sides,” Lionel told him. “That’s just not always true. If somebody is claiming the earth is flat or the moon is made of green cheese, we’re under no obligation to provide them with equal time against people who have the facts on their side.”

— Craig Schaefer

26. “Pix?” I said. “Pretend for a second that I’m not a hacker.” “I’m a jobber in a tag-team cage match against John Cena and The Rock. My partner just got laid out cold with a folding chair, and the referee is looking the other way.”

— Craig Schaefer

27. “I’d never broken into a cemetery before. There’s a first time for everything.”

— Craig Schaefer

28. “Most confidence games depend on the mark not knowing they’re being conned. The Kansas City Shuffle depends on the mark knowing it. Not only do they have to see you coming, they have to figure out your entire plan before it happens.” “Problem being,” Corman said, “they’re working to stop the wrong con. You get ’em looking left, while you rob ’em blind on the right.” “We can’t take the coin out of the building,” I said, “but Royce can. So let’s give him a reason to do it.”

— Craig Schaefer

29. “The key to walking around places where you’re not supposed to be is to look like you’re too important to be interrupted. Most people are non-confrontational by nature, and if you give them a good reason not to challenge you, they won’t. I.”

— Craig Schaefer

30. “Adrenaline after a gunfight’s like a coked-up rock star in an expensive hotel room. It doesn’t leave until it trashes the place.”

— Craig Schaefer

31. “I felt like the sheriff in an old Western, gearing up for a showdown at high noon, only to find out the black-hat outlaw accidentally fell off his horse and died from a concussion on his way to the gunfight. No satisfaction, no closure.”

— Craig Schaefer

32. “I love working with fanatics. You just wind them up, and off they go.”

— Craig Schaefer

33. “This isn’t some sweet Disney bedtime story. This is a real fairy tale. With death, and blood, and suffering. And I never promise a happy ending.”

— Craig Schaefer

34. “He held out his hand. “Give it to me,” he hissed as his fingernails lengthened into claws. “If you insist,” I said. Then I shot him in the face.”

— Craig Schaefer

35. “I realize you’re a politician, so this is a new concept for you. ‘Cooperating’ means actually doing what you’re supposed to, not just saying you will and then weaseling out.”

— Craig Schaefer

36. “You mean,” she said, “do I want to go and hunt the Bogeyman in the dark? Why, I’d be ever so delighted. Let’s roll.”

— Craig Schaefer

37. “My guys saw you on Fremont last week, Dan. You know what they saw you doing?” “Their mothers?” I replied. “Funny,” he said and turned back to Juliette.”

— Craig Schaefer

38. “I am a patriot. That means I owe my loyalty to the armies I swore to lead and the citizens I swore to protect. I am loyal to the crown and what it means. Not to the fool wearing it.”

— Craig Schaefer

39. “Honor,” she said, “is the coin that stays in your pocket when all your silver has been spent.”

— Craig Schaefer

40. “Good. I need to arm up. All I’ve got is a gun with four bullets, and it’s a really embarrassing gun.”

— Craig Schaefer

41. “At a distance, they looked just boring enough to be important.”

— Craig Schaefer

42. “According to Caitlin, he’d been on the throne since Hannibal discovered elephants, and he was so slippery he would orchestrate assassination plots against himself when he got bored, just to keep his wits sharp.”

— Craig Schaefer

43. “Rare. Rare as pirate gold. Just wave a candle in its general direction.”

— Craig Schaefer

44. “You’re playing solitaire with no aces in the deck, and you can’t figure out why you never win.”

— Craig Schaefer

45. “Boys,” Jessie said, “you’re looking at your worst nightmare. I’m a black lesbian from the government, and I’m here to take away your guns.”

— Craig Schaefer

46. “I’m the woman who makes the monsters go away.”

— Craig Schaefer

47. “You don’t rut with a pride demon; you hold up a mirror for him to stare into while he pleasures himself. I’m only slightly exaggerating.”

— Craig Schaefer

48. “She had personal details about my relationships that only my close friends should have known. “So you’ve got a stalker,” I said to my reflection in the rearview mirror. “And she eats people. Great.”

— Craig Schaefer

49. “Now bottle your hatred and store it in your heart’s pantry for a thirstier day.”

— Craig Schaefer

50. “I believe that ‘finding the book you’re looking for’ is an overrated notion,” the man replied. “Far better to explore, and let the book you need be the one which finds you.”

— Craig Schaefer