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Top 8 Dave Beard Quotes (2026 Update)

Dave Beard Quote: “Many years ago I resolved never to bother with New Year’s resolutions, and I’ve stuck with it ever since.”

1. “Many years ago I resolved never to bother with New Year’s resolutions, and I’ve stuck with it ever since.”

— Dave Beard

Dave Beard Quote: “Do you suppose it’s true, that St. Patrick was a parselmouth, and his muggle friends never knew?”

2. “Do you suppose it’s true, that St. Patrick was a parselmouth, and his muggle friends never knew?”

— Dave Beard

Dave Beard Quote: “I usually lump organized religion, organized labor, and organized crime together. The Mafia gets points for having the best restaurants.”

3. “I usually lump organized religion, organized labor, and organized crime together. The Mafia gets points for having the best restaurants.”

— Dave Beard

Dave Beard Quote: “A rhododendron bud lavender-tipped. Soon a glory of blooms to clash with the cardinals and gladden the hummingbirds!”

4. “A rhododendron bud lavender-tipped. Soon a glory of blooms to clash with the cardinals and gladden the hummingbirds!”

— Dave Beard

Dave Beard Quote: “Spooky wild and gusty; swirling dervishes of rattling leaves race by, fleeing the windflung deadwood that cracks and thumps behind.”

5. “Spooky wild and gusty; swirling dervishes of rattling leaves race by, fleeing the windflung deadwood that cracks and thumps behind.”

— Dave Beard

Dave Beard Quote: “The pilgrims were kicked out of England, quarreled with the Dutch, alienated the Indians, and had an evil reputation among the turkeys.”

6. “The pilgrims were kicked out of England, quarreled with the Dutch, alienated the Indians, and had an evil reputation among the turkeys.”

— Dave Beard

Dave Beard Quote: “The Olympic games should be a matter between individual athletes and the gods. Noisy flag-waving dishonors gods and men alike.”

7. “The Olympic games should be a matter between individual athletes and the gods. Noisy flag-waving dishonors gods and men alike.”

— Dave Beard

Dave Beard Quote: “I’ve been smoking nearly 50 years now. I just don’t feel safe breathing anything I can’t see!”

8. “I’ve been smoking nearly 50 years now. I just don’t feel safe breathing anything I can’t see!”

— Dave Beard

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