1. “Niall Quinn is a creep. The man’s an idiot, a Mother Theresa.”
— Eamon Dunphy
2. “Usually it takes a bottle of Bacardi and a gallon of Coke to get John out of his seat.”
3. “I’ve never managed anywhere, I’ve managed to stay alive for 63 and a half years baby.”
4. “He’s fat and a clown, Bill, a fat clown for all to see.”
5. “Michel Platini has no bottle. He is not a great player.”
6. “Ronaldo is a disgrace to the game. His petulance, temperament, throwing himself on the ground. It was a disgrace to professional football. This fella Ronaldo is a cod.”
7. “Somewhere in there the grace of a ballet dancer joins with the strength of an SAS squaddie, the dignity of an ancient kind, the nerve of a bomb disposal officer...”
8. “Kilbane’s head is better than his feet. If only he had three heads, one on the end of each leg.”
9. “You need dictatorships and poverty to produce great footballers.”
10. “Scots they’re either nice or they’re horrid and these two are horrid. The Scots wont like that Eamon, thats bordering on racism. Its not racism its ethnic criticism Bill.”
11. “Found out. A nothing player.”
12. “We’ll all see through Mourinho. We’ll find out he’s just a Bengal lancer.”
13. “Ability and guts is an unbeatable combination.”
14. “I’ll have you know that I am not a failed Third Division footballer. I am a failed Second Division footballer.”
15. “Well, I don’t like to make outlandish statements. Not all the time. But Wimbledon would have beaten them 10-0.”
16. “Every club he’s been to has had great injury crises. Every club. And it’s always hamstrings.”
17. “They get to the quarter-finals, Bill, I’ll show up with a dress on.”
18. “If ever a player was out of his class that night it was me.”
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