Top 500 George Bernard Shaw Quotes (2026 Update)
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201. “When God created man and woman, he did not take a patent. That’s why any imbecile has been able to do so ever since.”

— George Bernard Shaw

202. “In this world there is always danger for those who are afraid of it.”

— George Bernard Shaw

203. “It is a woman’s business to get married as soon as possible, and a man’s to keep unmarried as long as he can.”

— George Bernard Shaw

204. “If a group of beings from another planet were to land on Earth – beings who considered themselves as superior to you as you feel yourself to be to other animals – would you concede them the rights over you that you assume over other animals?”

— George Bernard Shaw

Featured in: Rights Quotes

205. “Reading made Don Quixote a gentleman, but believing what he read made him mad.”

— George Bernard Shaw

Featured in: Reading Quotes

206. “The first condition of progress is the removal of censorship.”

— George Bernard Shaw

Featured in: Firsts Quotes

207. “I am afraid we must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy.”

— George Bernard Shaw

208. “Socialism is the same as Communism, only better English.”

— George Bernard Shaw

209. “Those who admire modern civilization usually identify it with the steam engine and the electric telegraph.”

— George Bernard Shaw

210. “No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office.”

— George Bernard Shaw

211. “First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity.”

— George Bernard Shaw

212. “What the world calls originality is only an unaccustomed method of tickling it.”

— George Bernard Shaw

213. “A family is a tyranny ruled over by it’s weakest member.”

— George Bernard Shaw

214. “Being hurt by someone you truly care about leaves a hole in you heart that only love can fill.”

— George Bernard Shaw

215. “Well, sir, you never can tell. That’s a principle in life with me, sir, if you’ll excuse my having such a thing.”

— George Bernard Shaw

216. “If any religion had a chance of ruling over England, nay Europe within the next hundred years, it could be Islam.”

— George Bernard Shaw

217. “God is on the side of the big battalions.”

— George Bernard Shaw

218. “I appeal to the chemists to discover a humane gas that will kill instantly and painlessly. In short- a gentlemanly gas deadly by all means, but humane, not cruel.”

— George Bernard Shaw

219. “Help someone, you earn a friend. Help someone too much, you make an enemy.”

— George Bernard Shaw

220. “Most people go to their grave with their music inside them.”

— George Bernard Shaw

221. “I was convinced that Ceylon is the cradle of the human race because everyone there looks an original.”

— George Bernard Shaw

222. “We are the living graves of murdered beasts, slaughtered to satisfy our appetites. How can we hope in this world to attain the peace we say we are so anxious for?”

— George Bernard Shaw

223. “Music is the brandy of the damned.”

— George Bernard Shaw

224. “Christianity might be a good thing if anyone ever tried it.”

— George Bernard Shaw

225. “You don’t learn to hold your own in the world by standing on guard, but by attacking, and getting well hammered yourself.”

— George Bernard Shaw

226. “It is impossible for an Englishman to open his mouth without making some other Englishman hate or despise him.”

— George Bernard Shaw

227. “Our first duty is not to be poor.”

— George Bernard Shaw

Featured in: Firsts Quotes

228. “People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances.”

— George Bernard Shaw

229. “The frontier between hell and heaven is only the difference between two ways of looking at things.”

— George Bernard Shaw

230. “Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough.”

— George Bernard Shaw

231. “Stimulate the phagocytes.”

— George Bernard Shaw

232. “Emotional excitement reaches men through tea, tobacco, opium, whisky, and religion.”

— George Bernard Shaw

233. “Where there is no knowledge ignorance calls itself science.”

— George Bernard Shaw

234. “Nothing makes a man so selfish as work.”

— George Bernard Shaw

235. “The educated man is a greater nuisance than the uneducated one.”

— George Bernard Shaw

236. “All government is cruel; for nothing is so cruel as impunity.”

— George Bernard Shaw

237. “Like fingerprints, all marriages are different.”

— George Bernard Shaw

238. “All professions are conspiracies against the laity.”

— George Bernard Shaw

239. “The sound body is the product of the sound mind.”

— George Bernard Shaw

240. “I am a Christian. That obliges me to be a Communist.”

— George Bernard Shaw

241. “The man with a toothache thinks everyone happy whose teeth are sound. The poverty-stricken man makes the same mistake about the rich man.”

— George Bernard Shaw

242. “My schooling not only failed to teach me what it professed to be teaching, but prevented me from being educated to an extent which infuriates me when I think of all I might have learned at home by myself.”

— George Bernard Shaw

243. “Remember that I too am mortal.”

— George Bernard Shaw

244. “The man who writes about himself and his own time is the only man who writes about all people and about all time.”

— George Bernard Shaw

245. “It seems as though every time you learn something new you have to give up something.”

— George Bernard Shaw

246. “The best way to get your point across is to entertain.”

— George Bernard Shaw

247. “Whether you think Jesus was God or not, you must admit he was a first-rate political economist.”

— George Bernard Shaw

248. “All this struggling and striving to make the world better is a great mistake. Not that it’s wrong to try to improve the world if you know how but simply because struggling and striving are the worst possible ways to go about doing anything!”

— George Bernard Shaw

249. “I like to quote myself frequently and often, it makes me sound much more intelligent than I actually am.”

— George Bernard Shaw

250. “Absolute honesty is as absurd an abstraction as an absolute temperature or an absolute value.”

— George Bernard Shaw