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Top 20 Henry Beard Quotes (2025 Update)

Henry Beard Quote: “A driving range is the place where golfers go to get all the good shots out of their system.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Nonchalant putts count the same as chalant putts.”
Henry Beard Quote: “I simply cannot imagine why anyone would eat something slimy served in an ashtray.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Hole in One: an occurence in which a ball is hit directly from the tee into the hole in a single shot by a golfer playing alone.”
Henry Beard Quote: “A tap-in is a putt that is short enough to be missed one-handed.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Few golfers are born with the natural talent for hitting the ball, but every player is blessed with the God-given ability to throw a club.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Garden: One of a vast number of free outdoor restaurants operated by charity-minded amateurs in an effort to provide healthful, balanced meals for insects, birds and animals.”
Henry Beard Quote: “The true definition of a perennial: Any plant which, had it lived, would have bloomed year after year.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Follow through: The part of the swing that takes place after the ball has been hit, but before the club has been thrown.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Advice to anglers: don’t take advice from people with missing fingers.”
Henry Beard Quote: “When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Bulb: potential flower buried in Autumn, never to be seen again.”
Henry Beard Quote: “A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Wear it if it clashes.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Chef: Any cook who swears in French.”
Henry Beard Quote: “If the wind is in your face, you swing too hard just to get the ball through it; if the wind is at your back, you swing too hard just to see how far you can get the ball to go.”
Henry Beard Quote: “It’s often necessary to hit a second shot to really appreciate the first one.”
Henry Beard Quote: “You do not sew with a fork and I see no reason why you should eat with knitting needles.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Fairway: a narrow strip of mown grass that separates two groups of golfers looking for lost balls in the rough.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Bets lengthen putts and shorten drives.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Handicap: an allocation of strokes on one or more holes that permits two golfers of very different ability to do equally poorly on the same course.”
Henry Beard Quote: “Hoeing: A manual method of severing roots from stems of newly planted flowers and vegetables.”
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