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Top 7 Huston Piner Quotes (2025 Update)

Huston Piner Quote: “They put a man on the moon. Can’t they find some way to end the scourge of algebra?”
Huston Piner Quote: “And it’s not like I’m the only guy in history to ever get a hard on in a high school locker room; for a lot of guys it’s just a natural reaction to the cool moist air. But the trouble is that around certain guys, I’m radically reactionary.”
Huston Piner Quote: “And then there’s my brother Wally; he’s four years younger than me, and he’s the classic younger brother – a turd. The Turd is kind of like that old nursery rhyme about snails and puppy dog tails; he’s got the intelligence of a slug and he’s about as well house-trained as a Chihuahua.”
Huston Piner Quote: “Wednesday is pizza day at Chadham High. The lunchroom smells like a cross between a sewer and a dead skunk. Chadham High pizza consists of a cardboard crust and sauce made of mud, topped with some kind of fungus that looks suspiciously like phlegm pretending to be cheese.”
Huston Piner Quote: “At Chadham High, the safest place to be gay was in the closet.”
Huston Piner Quote: “I used to think passion and love were pretty much the same thing, but they’re not. Physical contact may feed passion, but it can’t feed a starving soul – only love can do that.”
Huston Piner Quote: “Algebra is one of those subjects you either get or you don’t.”
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