Top 50 James C. Dobson Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “He concluded in the last scene that we are given two choices in life. We can allow ourselves to love and care for others, which makes us vulnerable to their sickness, death, or rejection. Or we can protect ourselves by refusing to love. Lewis decided that it is better to feel and to suffer than to go through life isolated, insulated, and lonely.”

— James C. Dobson

2. “28. Feelings are neither right nor wrong. It’s what you do with them that causes the problems.”

— James C. Dobson

3. “Nations that are populated largely by immature, immoral, weak-willed, cowardly, and self-indulgent men cannot and will not long endure. These types of men include those who sire and abandon their children; who cheat on their wives; who lie, steal, and covet; who hate their countrymen; and who serve no god but money. That is the direction culture is taking today’s boys.”

— James C. Dobson

4. “Ask yourself what you will care about when everything is on the line.”

— James C. Dobson

5. “The idea that Love Must Be Tough dictates that we be willing to set another person free- even if it causes us great pain to let go. When we do this, we maximize the chances that that loved one will not leave, because the cage door has been opened and self-respect has been affirmed.”

— James C. Dobson

6. “10. Comparison is the root of all feelings of inferiority. The moment you begin examining other people’s strengths against your most obvious weaknesses, your self-esteem starts to crumble!”

— James C. Dobson

7. “When you strip away all the layers one by one, not much remains to “discover.” You will never find real meaning among your selfish interests, feelings, and aspirations. The answers do not lie within you.”

— James C. Dobson

8. “29. Most loneliness results from insulation rather than isolation. In other words, we are lonely because we insulate ourselves, not because others isolate us.”

— James C. Dobson

9. “12. There will come a day, much quicker than your parents would wish, when you will no longer be comfortable living at home. You will want to move out and establish a home of your own. After that time, your mother and father will be more like your friends than your parents. And someday, if they live long enough, you will be more like a parent to them than a son or daughter.”

— James C. Dobson

10. “Behavior has consequences, and stupid behavior often has terrible consequences.”

— James C. Dobson

11. “There is no indication that God explained to Joseph what He was doing through those many years of heartache or how the pieces would eventually fit together. He had no ways of knowing that he would eventually enjoy a triumphal reunion with his family. He was expected, as you and I are, to live out his life one day at a time in something less than complete understanding. What pleased God was Joseph’s faithfulness when nothing made sense.”

— James C. Dobson

12. “Girls are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their mothers, grandmothers, and other women in previous generations. Today’s little girls are being enticed to grow up too fast and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.”

— James C. Dobson

13. “If a girl sees herself as a lady, she will expect her escort to behave like a gentleman. He will respect her if she respects herself.”

— James C. Dobson

14. “17. One of the secrets of successful living is found in the word balance, referring to the avoidance of harmful extremes. We need food, but we should not overeat. We should work, but not make work our only activity. We should play, but not let play rule us. Throughout life, it will be important to find the safety of the middle ground rather than the imbalance of the extremes.”

— James C. Dobson

15. “Beautiful, enticing, forbidden fruit will be offered to you when your “hunger” is greatest. If you are foolish enough to reach for it, your fingers will sink into the rotten mush on the back side. That’s the way sin operates in our lives. It promises everything. It delivers nothing but disgust and heartache.”

— James C. Dobson

16. “Let me leave you with this thought, written by my father before he died. If you incorporate it into your system of values, it will serve as a worthy guide to the management of your sexual energy: Strong desire is like a river. As long as it flows within the banks of God’s will – be the current strong or weak – all is well. But when it overruns those boundaries and seeks its own channels, then disaster lurks in the rampage below.”

— James C. Dobson

17. “Your most precious memories will focus on those you loved, those who loved you, and what you did together in the service of the Lord.”

— James C. Dobson

18. “But we must understand that emotions are unreliable and at times, tyrannical. They should never be permitted to dominate us.”

— James C. Dobson

19. “2. Overcommitment and time pressure are the greatest destroyers of marriages. It takes time to develop any friendship... whether with a loved one or with God Himself.”

— James C. Dobson

20. “Women hold the keys to masculine behavior. Guys are inclined to take what they can get and be no more accommodating than they have to be.”

— James C. Dobson

21. “I don’t want to die. I deserve, certainly, the most extreme punishment society has, and I think society deserves to be protected from me and from others like me. That’s the irony. What I’m talking about is going beyond retribution because there is no way in the world that killing me is going to restore those beautiful children to their parents and correct and soothe the pain.”

— James C. Dobson

22. “37. It is better to be single and unhappy than unhappily married.”

— James C. Dobson

23. “Given these differences between the sexes, the sexual revolution was the biggest joke men ever played on women. By convincing them that the old rules didn’t apply and that two could play the predator game, men enticed women to do what men have always wanted women to do. But what a price was paid for the new “freedom.” And predictably, women were the ones who got stuck with the bill.”

— James C. Dobson

24. “13. If you’re going through difficult times today, hold steady. It will change soon. If you are experiencing smooth sailing and easy times now, brace yourself. It will change soon. The only thing you can be certain of is change.”

— James C. Dobson

25. “I think people need to recognize that those of us who have been so much influenced by violence in the media- in particular pornographic violence- are not some kinds of inherent monsters. We are your sons, and we are your husbands. And we grew up in regular families.”

— James C. Dobson

26. “The best way to get children to do what you want is to spend time with them before disciplinary problems occur – having fun together and enjoying mutual laughter and joy. When those moments of love and closeness happen, kids are not as tempted to challenge and test the limits. Many confrontations can be avoided by building friendships with kids and thereby making them want to cooperate at home. It sure beats anger as a motivator of little ones!”

— James C. Dobson

27. “Meg MacKenzie who said raising her two sons is like living with a tornado.”

— James C. Dobson

28. “I thank God for schools that are serious about the gospel of Jesus Christ. They are vital to perpetuating our faith through your generation and beyond.”

— James C. Dobson

29. “Nothing in this physical world moves from disorder to order without intelligence and energy being applied to it.”

— James C. Dobson

30. “So enjoy the exhilaration when it comes. Take the ride to the heights when you get the opportunity. But don’t get hooked on the thrill of the moment. Take charge of your emotions. And when it comes time to do the right thing, don’t let your feelings lead you to compromise. That is the way to live a happier, more successful life and one that is more pleasing to God.”

— James C. Dobson

31. “19. Those who are the happiest are not necessarily those for whom life has been easiest. Emotional stability results from an attitude. It is refusing to yield to depression and fear, even when black clouds float overhead. It is improving that which can be improved and accepting that which is inevitable.”

— James C. Dobson

32. “23. With God, even when nothing is happening... something is happening.”

— James C. Dobson

33. “The Lord gave me this challenging child for a purpose. He wants me to mold and shape this youngster and prepare him or her for a life of service to Him.”

— James C. Dobson

34. “I read one study that indicated when a couple has been together for approximately three hundred hours, even most of those who are trying to be moral will do things they didn’t intend originally. They may not even realize that is where the relationship is headed until it happens.”

— James C. Dobson

35. “Resist the temptation to see yourself as a victim.”

— James C. Dobson

36. “When you consider the many pressures that couples face today, only an iron-clad determination will hold them together for a lifetime. Those who go into marriage with a mushy commitment are likely to wobble and fall apart when the hard times come. And as we all know, hard times will come.”

— James C. Dobson

37. “Until we know who we are and why we are here, no amount of success, fame, money, or pleasure will provide much satisfaction.”

— James C. Dobson

38. “Husbands and wives need to return regularly to the kinds of romantic activities that drew them together in the first place.”

— James C. Dobson

39. “I urge all parents, but especially fathers, to work at building your daughter’s self-concept throughout her childhood. Tell her she is pretty every chance you get. Hug her. Compliment her admirable traits. Build her confidence by giving her your time and attention. Defend her when she is struggling. And let her know that she has a place in your heart that is reserved only for her. She will never forget it.”

— James C. Dobson

40. “The relationship between a guy and a girl naturally becomes more intimate as they spend time together.”

— James C. Dobson

41. “God Himself even “forgets” the wickedness committed by those whom He has forgiven. That’s why it is never too late to clean up your life.”

— James C. Dobson

42. “Clearly, unless the Lord chooses to explain Himself to us, which He does not often do, His motivation and purposes are beyond the reach of mortal man.”

— James C. Dobson

43. “32. Before you criticize your parents for their failures and mistakes, ask yourself: “Will I really do that much better with my own children?” The job is tougher than it looks, and mistakes are inevitable!”

— James C. Dobson

44. “Steps can then be taken to slow down the natural progression before it gets started. It doesn’t work to allow all the preliminary intimacies and then hope to stop the progression just short of intercourse. Very few people have the willpower to do that.”

— James C. Dobson

45. “26. Don’t marry someone with intolerable characteristics in the hopes of changing him or her. If you can’t live with someone who drinks or someone who isn’t a Christian or someone who isn’t clean, then don’t marry that kind of person. The chances for miraculous improvements or changes in behavior are slim. What you see is what you get!”

— James C. Dobson

46. “If a boy pulls up and honks for her, go out and have words with him. Explain that your daughter answers to a doorbell.”

— James C. Dobson

47. “Whenever you begin to conclude, “I can’t win,” and “What’s the use?” you’ve set yourself up for failure. Your pessimism becomes a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy.”

— James C. Dobson

48. “Highs must be followed by lows.”

— James C. Dobson

49. “Whether right or wrong, it is my belief that Christian colleges place their emphasis not on that which divides us, but on the substance that binds us together. That commonality is the gospel of Jesus Christ. He commanded us to love one another – to set aside our differences and to care for “the least of these” among us. It is our unity, not our diversity, that deserves our allegiance.”

— James C. Dobson

50. “Even in that difficult hour when he knew death was imminent, he never indulged in self-pity. He knew intuitively that a person is only a victim if he accepts himself as one.”

— James C. Dobson