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Top 20 Jay London Quotes (2025 Update)

Jay London Quote: “Did you know that today will never be tomorrow.”
Jay London Quote: “I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out.”
Jay London Quote: “My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality.”
Jay London Quote: “I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out.”
Jay London Quote: “A window of opportunity for me usually involves a rock.”
Jay London Quote: “My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings.”
Jay London Quote: “I don’t need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.”
Jay London Quote: “My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can’t say cheese.”
Jay London Quote: “I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?”
Jay London Quote: “It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.”
Jay London Quote: “I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm.”
Jay London Quote: “I’m on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness.”
Jay London Quote: “I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger.”
Jay London Quote: “I model irregular clothing.”
Jay London Quote: “I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I’m watching the highlights.”
Jay London Quote: “I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road.”
Jay London Quote: “I told my therapist I was having nightmares about nuclear explosions. He said don’t worry it’s not the end of the world.”
Jay London Quote: “I went to an audition the other day, they were casting 13 people to be clouds, 14 people showed up, it was overcast.”
Jay London Quote: “I went out with a promiscuous impressionist. She did everybody.”
Jay London Quote: “I went to a urologist – he told me I could go at any time.”
Jay London Quote: “I’m convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb – they diffused it.”
Jay London Quote: “His puppyhood was a period of foolish rebellion. He was always worsted, but he fought back because it was his nature to fight back. And he was unconquerable.”
Jay London Quote: “They asked me what I thought about euthanasia. I said I’m more concerned about the adults.”
Jay London Quote: “A guy gave me a job at an information booth – no questions asked.”
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