Top 180 Jeff Lindsay Quotes (2024 Update)
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51. “Deke looked at me anxiously, reminding me very much of a large and handsome dog who needs a stick to fetch.”

— Jeff Lindsay

52. “Money to me had always been merely something the sheep used to show each other how wonderful they were.”

— Jeff Lindsay

53. “It didn’t seem like Sergeant Doakes would give up before my conversion to a beer-bellied sofa ornament was complete, and I could see nothing else to do except play kick the can and hangman with Cody and Astor, performing outrageously theatrical good-bye kisses with Rita afterward for the benefit of my stalker.”

— Jeff Lindsay

54. “But the rules are made by people who couldn’t win without ’em.”

— Jeff Lindsay

55. “What a frail thing a human being is – and without the Passenger, that is all I was, a poor imitation of a human being. Weak, soft, slow and stupid, unseeing, unhearing and unaware, helpless, hopeless, and harried.”

— Jeff Lindsay

56. “First things first has always been my motto, mostly because it makes absolutely no sense – after all, if first things were second or third, they wouldn’t be first things, would they? Still, cliches exist to comfort the feeble minded, not to provide any actual meaning.”

— Jeff Lindsay

57. “Me, feeling. What a concept.”

— Jeff Lindsay

58. “I took a sip. The taste was bitter and thin, just as I would be if I had to keep the Dark Passenger buckled into his seat belt for very long.”

— Jeff Lindsay

59. “I find others, those who prey on the innocent and do not play by the rules, and I make them go away in small, carefully wrapped pieces.”

— Jeff Lindsay

60. “I enjoyed watching good-looking idiots looking at each other. A great spectator sport.”

— Jeff Lindsay

61. “Hope is for people who can’t see the Truth.”

— Jeff Lindsay

62. “Was insanity really easier to accept than unconsciousness?”

— Jeff Lindsay

63. “But as I have noticed on more than one occaision, life itself is unfair, and there is no complaint department, so we might as well accept things the way they happen, clean up the mess, and move on.”

— Jeff Lindsay

64. “Because I am an inhuman monster, I tend to be logical,...”

— Jeff Lindsay

65. “Rectory always sounded to me like a place you would find a proctologist.”

— Jeff Lindsay

66. “Chapin was secured in the backseat – the motor-pool cars had rings bolted to the floor for just that reason – and he sat in his durance vile mumbling, ranting, threatening, and overusing the same naughty word.”

— Jeff Lindsay

67. “For my part, my interest in Paris had faded away completely long ago when I learned that it was in France.”

— Jeff Lindsay

68. “She really did like me, the idiot.”

— Jeff Lindsay

69. “Another dream. Another long-distance call on my phantom party line. No wonder i had steadfastly refused to have dreams for most of my life. So stupid; such pointless, obvious symbols. Totally uncontrollable anxiety soup, hateful, blatant nonsense.”

— Jeff Lindsay

70. “I nodded with genuine synthetic sympathy.”

— Jeff Lindsay

71. “Killing makes me feel good.”

— Jeff Lindsay

72. “It’s terrible to have to depend on someone else.”

— Jeff Lindsay

73. “Really now: If you can’t get me my newspaper on time, how can you expect me to refrain from killing people?”

— Jeff Lindsay

74. “There’s lots of bad guys out there. I can’t catch them all. To be truthful, she couldn’t catch any of them unless they hurled themselves off a building and into the front seat of her car.”

— Jeff Lindsay

75. “Whatever made me the way I am left me hollow, empty inside, unable to feel. It doesn’t seem like a big deal.”

— Jeff Lindsay

76. “Always marveling at how New Age pseudo-philosophy had taken over the Internet.”

— Jeff Lindsay

77. “Dying makes everyone weaker, subject to painful insight, and not always insight into any kind of special truth – it’s just the approaching end that makes people want to believe they are seeing something in the line of a great revelation.”

— Jeff Lindsay

78. “Rita bent her face down toward the floor and shuffled over to the coffeemaker and poured herself a cup. Then she sat across the table from me and took a sip. “Dexter,” she said, “it’s perfectly normal to have reservations.” “Of course,” I said, with absolutely no idea what she meant, “otherwise you don’t get a table.”

— Jeff Lindsay

79. “I often find myself in situations where it seems to me like everyone else has read the instruction book.”

— Jeff Lindsay

80. “At nineteen, I certainly didn’t know the answer, although I already knew more about death than most of the other pimple-ridden pudding heads in my sophomore class at the University of Miami.”

— Jeff Lindsay

81. “Earth to Dexter,” Astor said, and I realized that I still stood in front of them frozen in my unlikely, foolish openmouthed pose like a pedantic zombie.”

— Jeff Lindsay

82. “Life teaches us that human thought almost never walks hand in hand with logic, and it is usually counterproductive to raise the point.”

— Jeff Lindsay

83. “Saturday morning was their unrestricted television time, and they usually took advantage of it to watch a series of cartoon shows that would certainly have been impossible before the discovery of LSD.”

— Jeff Lindsay

84. “I smiled at her, my most comforting, challenging, I’m-not-really-a-shark smile.”

— Jeff Lindsay

85. “And as always seems to happen when I have reached the point where I am ready to take decisive action, everything began to happen at once.”

— Jeff Lindsay

86. “Dexter is modest, even self-effacing, and certainly aware of the limits of his considerable talent. But if there was a limit to what I could discover on the computer, I had not found it yet. I sat back down and went to work.”

— Jeff Lindsay

87. “I felt like a ventriloquist’s dummy, suddenly called upon to perform the whole act alone.”

— Jeff Lindsay

88. “I read on. Aramaic, like Hebrew, did not use vowels. Instead, you had to supply them yourself.”

— Jeff Lindsay

89. “In its own way the kiss had been an act of murder.”

— Jeff Lindsay

90. “Getting yelled at by a furious woman should be a semi-formal occasion.”

— Jeff Lindsay

91. “There are still very few laws against thinking, although I am sure they’re working hard on that in Washington.”

— Jeff Lindsay

92. “I sighed; as comforting as it may be to some of us, sarcasm, like youth, is wasted on the young.”

— Jeff Lindsay

93. “I have really good eyesight,” I said, wondering if everyone who came in to see me today was going to be profoundly annoying.”

— Jeff Lindsay

94. “A reasonable being might think that he and I could find some common ground; have a cup of coffee and compare our Passengers, exchange trade talk and chitchat about dismemberment techniques. But no: Doakes wanted me dead. And I found it difficult to share his point of view.”

— Jeff Lindsay

95. “Oh,” I said, and my eyes pop open to the fluorescent light of Deborah’s office, and no matter how hard I try to push it away and find a way not to believe it, the things I saw do not change. Even in the harsh and ugly light of the office the picture is the same, and even worse, I now see Deb and Jackie staring at me uncertainly, as if they had been watching me urinate on a busy street. “Oh, um,” I say. “It’s, you know. I just thought of something.”

— Jeff Lindsay

96. “And so as much as I can, I care about her, dear Deborah. It’s probably not love, but I would rather she were happy.”

— Jeff Lindsay

97. “He was blond, about six feet tall, muscular, and absurdly good-looking in a rugged, masculine way, as if God had taken Brad Pitt and decided to make him really handsome.”

— Jeff Lindsay

98. “I let it ring. I wanted to breathe for a few minutes, and I could think of nothing that couldn’t wait. Besides, I had paid almost $50 for an answering machine. Let it earn its keep.”

— Jeff Lindsay

99. “I don’t know if you have noticed this, but it is quite possible for two human beings to have a conversation in which one or both parties involved has absolutely no idea what they’re talking about.”

— Jeff Lindsay

100. “I was a near perfect hologram.”

— Jeff Lindsay