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Top 180 Jeff Lindsay Quotes (2025 Update)

Jeff Lindsay Quote: “I was never more alive than when the Dark Passenger was driving.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “It happens; incompetence is rewarded more often than not.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Nothing in life is fair. Fair is a dirty word and I’ll thank you not to use that language around me.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Our universe is ruled by random whim, inhabited by people who laugh at logic.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “It’s always me, isn’t it? I’m not really a very nice person, but for some reason it’s always me that they come to with their problems.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “I know family comes first, but shouldn’t that mean after breakfast?”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “The mind picks some very bad times to take a walk doesn’t it?”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “You’re driving me NORMAL!”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Whatever made me the way I am left me hollow, empty inside, unable to feel. It doesn’t seem like a big deal. I’m quite sure most people fake an awful lot of everyday human contact. I just fake it all. I fake it very well, and the feelings are never there.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Weren’t we all crazy in our sleep? What was sleep, after all, but the process by which we dumped our insanity into a dark subconscious pit and came out on the other side ready to eat cereal instead of our neighbor’s children?”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Now I know what it is like to feel like a total idiot.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Mutilated corpses with a chance of afternoon showers. I got dressed and went to work.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “It really is better to be lucky than to be good.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Why bother inflicting enormous pain on yourself when sooner or later Life would certainly get around to doing it for you?”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Feeling – what authentic human fun!”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “And I was having too much fun to stop now.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Or was he saying, “Hi! Wanna play?” And I did. Of course I did.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “In that tremendous flash of freedom, on my way to do The Thing for the first time, sanctioned by Almighty Harry, I receded, faded back into the scenery of my own dark self, whole the other me crouched and growled. I would do It at last, do what I had been created to do. And I did.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Since I am not actually a real human being, my emotional responses are generally limited to what I have learned to fake.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “This was just no fun. I wanted my brain back.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “They like to tell us that it is important to speak the truth, but it has been my experience that real happiness lies in having people tell you what you want to believe, usually not the same thing at all, and if you have to stub your toe on the truth later, so be it.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “And here I always thought morality was useless.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “That’s why I liked him, I think. Another guy pretending to be human, just like me.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “And as we should all know by now, anytime you predict failure you have an excellent chance of being right.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “No big deal. We all have blood in us, the trick is keeping it inside.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Of course it was a terrible thing, and the world would be a much better place without someone in it who could do that, but did that mean we had to miss lunch?”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “It was almost enough to make me feel emotion.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Of course, having information to use is one thing. Knowing what it means and how to use it is a different story.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “It’s like, everything really is two ways, the way we all pretend it is and the way it really is.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “I think people understand things different when they get older. It’s not a question of getting soft, or seeing things in the gray areas instead of black and white. I really believe I’m just understanding things different. Better.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “But of course, there’s no rest for the wicked, which I certainly am; as I said, no rest for the wicked.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Anybody can be charming if they don’t mind faking it, saying all the stupid, obvious, nauseating things that a conscience keeps most people from saying. Happily, I don’t have a conscience. I say them.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “I had become a perfect fake human, saying the stupid and pointless things that humans say to each other all day long.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “I don’t do my job to catch the bad guys. Why would I want to do that? No, I do my job to make order out of chaos.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Stop the nurse like the monkey.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “The key to a happy life is to have accomplishments to be proud of and purpose to look forward to, and at the moment I had both. How wonderful it was to be me.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “It was such an unexpected and genuine smile that if I only had a soul I’m sure I would have felt quite guilty.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Pero, por triste que sea, la vida no siempre imita al arte. -Dexter.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “As I’ve said, freedom is really an illusion. Anytime we think we have a real choice, it just means we haven’t seen the shotgun aimed at our navel.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “For the first time I could remember, I felt weak, woozy and stupid – like a human-being. Like a very small and helpless human-being.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “And then more quiet, silence so deep it almost drowned out the roar of the night music that pounded away in my secret self.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “I did not like this feeling of having feelings.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “I had killed our careful relationship by driving my tongue through its heart and pushing it off a cliff.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Life’s only obligation, afterall, was to be interesting.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Perhaps because I’ll never be one, humans are interesting to me.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Nothing else loves me, nor ever will. Not even – especially – me. I know what I am and that’s not a thing to love.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “I rose to my knees, mouth dry and heart pounding, and paused to finger a rip in my beautiful Dacron bowling shirt. I pushed my fingertip through the hole and wiggled it at myself. Hello, Dexter, where are you going? Hello, Mr. Finger. I don’t know, but I’m almost there. I hear my friends calling.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “A man who discovers his pants are on fire tends to have very little time to worry about somebody else’s box of matches.”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “Who was I if I was no longer me?”
Jeff Lindsay Quote: “That left either magical powers or coincidence, and although I have nothing at all against Harry Potter, coincidence got my vote.”
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