Top 10 Jeffery Russell Quotes (2024 Update)

Jeffery Russell Quote: “A lich guards his phylactery like an elf guards his salad.”

1. “A lich guards his phylactery like an elf guards his salad.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “The Athenaeum always managed to have a scribe on hand whenever anything interesting seemed like it might happen. Durham avoided scribes, figuring that ‘interesting’ was not a word that was necessarily synonymous with ‘pleasant’.”

2. “The Athenaeum always managed to have a scribe on hand whenever anything interesting seemed like it might happen. Durham avoided scribes, figuring that ‘interesting’ was not a word that was necessarily synonymous with ‘pleasant’.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “The air was thick and still, chilled. Water dripped somewhere, irregularly. Was the sun positioned perfectly to send ruddy rays of light through the swirling dust within, throwing their shadows long and stark across the floor? Of course it was.”

3. “The air was thick and still, chilled. Water dripped somewhere, irregularly. Was the sun positioned perfectly to send ruddy rays of light through the swirling dust within, throwing their shadows long and stark across the floor? Of course it was.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “Eureka!” Mungo yelled. It was a word that wasn’t actually a word but which he’d mathematically proved to exist in a parallel realm and he quite liked the sound of it when it came to needing something to yell in moments of cerebral triumph.”

4. “Eureka!” Mungo yelled. It was a word that wasn’t actually a word but which he’d mathematically proved to exist in a parallel realm and he quite liked the sound of it when it came to needing something to yell in moments of cerebral triumph.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “Mungo was a gnome. Disguised as a dwarf. The blatantly false beard was a giveaway. It appeared that Mungo had crafted it himself out of hair collected from a wide assortment of cars and then glued it to his face.”

5. “Mungo was a gnome. Disguised as a dwarf. The blatantly false beard was a giveaway. It appeared that Mungo had crafted it himself out of hair collected from a wide assortment of cars and then glued it to his face.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “There is a distinct evolutionary advantage to being fuzzy, as much of the mammal kingdom had discovered, particularly when you wanted a human to scratch your back. The dwarven evolutionary tree had embraced this concept wholeheartedly only to discover that once you started talking and expressing opinions a human’s desire to scratch your back became directly inverse to how fuzzy it was.”

6. “There is a distinct evolutionary advantage to being fuzzy, as much of the mammal kingdom had discovered, particularly when you wanted a human to scratch your back. The dwarven evolutionary tree had embraced this concept wholeheartedly only to discover that once you started talking and expressing opinions a human’s desire to scratch your back became directly inverse to how fuzzy it was.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “He attempted to bark the order and succeeded, albeit with more of a chihuahua result than intended.”

7. “He attempted to bark the order and succeeded, albeit with more of a chihuahua result than intended.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “Can’t abide adventure. ‘Adventure’ is a word people use to put a shine on lack of preparation and surviving through dumb luck.”

8. “Can’t abide adventure. ‘Adventure’ is a word people use to put a shine on lack of preparation and surviving through dumb luck.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “Cheese, where you takes liquid from a cow lady’s business parts, mix it with a bit o’ juices from a baby cow’s fourth stomach and then let it grow all fuzzy-moldy for a few years, eh?”

9. “Cheese, where you takes liquid from a cow lady’s business parts, mix it with a bit o’ juices from a baby cow’s fourth stomach and then let it grow all fuzzy-moldy for a few years, eh?”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “He glanced helplessly at Ruby, hoping for some help. She was a scribe and had more experience with dwarves than the six hours that Durham had acquired. He’s assumed that, as a fellow human, she would make an effort to be some sort of cultural ambassador to help him survive past lunch. Ruby’s current interpretation of being helpful seemed to be a silent smirk.”

10. “He glanced helplessly at Ruby, hoping for some help. She was a scribe and had more experience with dwarves than the six hours that Durham had acquired. He’s assumed that, as a fellow human, she would make an effort to be some sort of cultural ambassador to help him survive past lunch. Ruby’s current interpretation of being helpful seemed to be a silent smirk.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “Ten wagons to choose from and you pick the only one that has a human on it. Racist.”

11. “Ten wagons to choose from and you pick the only one that has a human on it. Racist.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “Teapots are not generally known for their aerodynamic qualities, hence the proclivity for their use during breaks between fighting rather than as an actual weapon of war.”

12. “Teapots are not generally known for their aerodynamic qualities, hence the proclivity for their use during breaks between fighting rather than as an actual weapon of war.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “The Dungeoneers, eh?” he asked. “Seems a grandiose name for rat-catchers.”

13. “The Dungeoneers, eh?” he asked. “Seems a grandiose name for rat-catchers.”

— Jeffery Russell

Jeffery Russell Quote: “Is that gnome with you? What is he doing to my fountain?” “Either trying to fix it or weaponize it,” Thud said. He shrugged. “Even odds as to which.”

14. “Is that gnome with you? What is he doing to my fountain?” “Either trying to fix it or weaponize it,” Thud said. He shrugged. “Even odds as to which.”

— Jeffery Russell

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