Top 150 Jimmy Buffett Quotes (2026 Update)
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101. “Where’s the church, who took the steeple, Religion’s in the hands of some crazy ass people, Television preachers with bad hair and dimples, The God’s honest truth is, it’s not that simple.”

— Jimmy Buffett

102. “So I’ll put on my bob marley tape And practice what I preach Get jah lost in the reggae mon As I walk along the beach.”

— Jimmy Buffett

103. “I made a deal with the devil for a whole lot of money.”

— Jimmy Buffett

104. “I was suppose to be a Jesuit priest or a naval academy graduate.”

— Jimmy Buffett

105. “Lights are glowing in the palm trees...”

— Jimmy Buffett

106. “What if life is just a cosmic joke, like spiders in your underwear.”

— Jimmy Buffett

107. “I got my hush puppies on. I guess I never was made meant for glitter rock and roll.”

— Jimmy Buffett

108. “Drive-in, you guzzle gin, commit a little mortal sin.”

— Jimmy Buffett

109. “Is it ignorance or apathy, I forget the lessons taught to me.”

— Jimmy Buffett

110. “I was hungry and went out for a bite, ran into a chum with a bottle of rum and we wound up drinking all night.”

— Jimmy Buffett

111. “Gluttony, do not eat thy neighbor’s wife’s popcorn.”

— Jimmy Buffett

112. “I got quarters in my loafers trying to fight inflation when it only used to take a cent.”

— Jimmy Buffett

113. “I arm myself with punch lines and a big old water gun.”

— Jimmy Buffett

114. “I want to keep going as I have, to travel, read, perform, write, and enjoy my family. I’ve promised myself only this: no more Laundromats, no more two-shows-a-night, and no more deadlines. I’ll work at my own pace.”

— Jimmy Buffett

115. “If life gives you limes make margaritas.”

— Jimmy Buffett

116. “You better lava me now or lava me not.”

— Jimmy Buffett

117. “The cheating was sweet, but my heart is beat. Don’t tear it apart, please by-pass this heart.”

— Jimmy Buffett

118. “I hate to mention age, but I come from an era when we weren’t consumed by technology and television. My mother insisted that her children read. To describe my scarce leisure time in today’s terms, I always default to reading.”

— Jimmy Buffett

119. “Under the heavens and under the sea there’s a friend I don’t know, who holds the right key.”

— Jimmy Buffett

120. “There’s damsels in distress out there, and we got all this beer.”

— Jimmy Buffett

121. “I know I should be leaving this climate, I’ve got a verse, but can’t rhyme it.”

— Jimmy Buffett

122. “Maybe there is another who sees life not as a flickering candle but as a torch that can illuminate an undiscovered world.”

— Jimmy Buffett

123. “That to me is the way any good romantic would look at his life: Live it first, then write it down before you go.”

— Jimmy Buffett

Featured in: Firsts Quotes

124. “Back to my childhood where those monsters reside. They snack on innocence and dine on self esteem.”

— Jimmy Buffett

125. “Mr. Bear, you know in the eyes of the Lord, we’re both beasts.”

— Jimmy Buffett

126. “Quitting doesn’t enter my mind.”

— Jimmy Buffett

127. “Nobody else cares about you at the beginning of your career except you-and, of course, your mother. Your mother is there because that is what mothers do.”

— Jimmy Buffett

128. “The right combination of guilt and machismo has sent many a fool out into the jungle when he should have stayed home.”

— Jimmy Buffett

129. “We’re wanted men, we’ll strike again, but first let’s have a beer.”

— Jimmy Buffett

Featured in: Firsts Quotes

130. “We made it nearly 20 centuries, a bunch of monkeys with PH Ds.”

— Jimmy Buffett

131. “You’ve been acting like Jesus owes you a favor, but he’s a little smart for you to fool.”

— Jimmy Buffett

132. “You know, as a writer, I’m more of a listener than a writer, cuz if I hear something I will write it down.”

— Jimmy Buffett

133. “Any attempts at autobiography before the age of eighty seem pretty self-involved to me. There are a lot of smart middle aged people but not many wise ones.”

— Jimmy Buffett

134. “Being rich and famous seems to have its ups and downs. That’s the price you pay for being troubadours and clowns.”

— Jimmy Buffett

135. “Bryl-cream, a little dab will do you.”

— Jimmy Buffett

136. “Found a shaman in a diaper with a poppy pot. When I asked if he was cold, he said just think hot.”

— Jimmy Buffett

137. “My only contact with the outside world was an RCA Victrola, and Elvis would sing, and then I’d dream about expensive cars.”

— Jimmy Buffett

138. “Elvis was the only man from Northeast Mississippi who could shake his hips and still be loved by rednecks, cops, and hippies.”

— Jimmy Buffett

139. “Songwriters write songs, but they really belong to the listener.”

— Jimmy Buffett

140. “I always said that I wouldn’t use a teleprompter, and if I start to sing real flat, I’ll hang it up.”

— Jimmy Buffett

141. “Pickup’s washed and you just got paid, with any luck at all you might even get laid.”

— Jimmy Buffett

142. “Maybe roll in the sand with a rock and roll man.”

— Jimmy Buffett

143. “I can’t fax you my love, I can’t email my heart.”

— Jimmy Buffett

144. “Never did I think that I became family entertainment.”

— Jimmy Buffett

145. “The beautiful people in the magazines, got the normal ones living beyond their means.”

— Jimmy Buffett

146. “The wino and I know the pain of back bustin’.”

— Jimmy Buffett

147. “Elvis up in Michigan and maybe out in Mars.”

— Jimmy Buffett

148. “What would Pop-eye do in a tight spot like this?”

— Jimmy Buffett

149. “You get religion as your hair turns grey.”

— Jimmy Buffett

150. “Tell me where are the flashbacks they all warned us would come?”

— Jimmy Buffett