Top 100 Johnny Carson Quotes (2025 Update)
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101. “Everybody I meet in public seems to want to audition for me. If I ask a guy what time it is, he’ll sing it to me.”

— Johnny Carson

102. “Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.”

— Johnny Carson

103. “I hated my last boss. He asked, Why are you two hours late? I said, I fell downstairs. He said, That doesn’t take two hours.”

— Johnny Carson

104. “We resort, frankly, to pies, which is a comedy staple that’s gone back, I guess, to since the first pie was ever baked.”

— Johnny Carson

105. “There’s a lot of hypocrisy in audiences. I’d never dream of telling even on a nightclub stage, let alone my show, some of the jokes that are told in a lot of the living rooms from which we get those letters!”

— Johnny Carson

106. “The only issue cash presents you is the independence of not stressing about funds.”

— Johnny Carson

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Fun Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

ENTREPRENEURSHIP BUSINESS INSPIRATIONAL

Positive Quotes

POSITIVITY

Albert Einstein Quotes

SCIENCE LIFE

Startup Quotes

ENTREPRENEURSHIP BUSINESS INSPIRATIONAL

Steve Jobs Quotes

ENTREPRENEURSHIP BUSINESS APPLE

SUCCESS

COURAGE MOTIVATIONAL STRENGTH

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LIFE

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Top 100 Johnny Carson Quotes (2025 Update)Page 3 of 3

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Top 100 Johnny Carson Quotes (2025 Update)
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