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Top 25 Leslie Nielsen Quotes (2025 Update)

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Truth hurts. Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with the seat missing, but it hurts.”

1. “Truth hurts. Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with the seat missing, but it hurts.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Like a midget at a urinal I was going to have to stay on my toes.”

2. “Like a midget at a urinal I was going to have to stay on my toes.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Doing nothing is very hard to do... you never know when you’re finished.”

3. “Doing nothing is very hard to do... you never know when you’re finished.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Do your part to silence gossip – don’t repeat it.”

4. “Do your part to silence gossip – don’t repeat it.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Doing nothing is very tough to do because you never know when you’re finished. The upside is that from the moment you wake up in the morning, you’re on the job.”

5. “Doing nothing is very tough to do because you never know when you’re finished. The upside is that from the moment you wake up in the morning, you’re on the job.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “There’s an old saying that God exists in your search for him. I just want you to understand that I ain’t looking.”

6. “There’s an old saying that God exists in your search for him. I just want you to understand that I ain’t looking.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I really have to keep an eye on myself, because sometimes I think I might say something important.”

7. “I really have to keep an eye on myself, because sometimes I think I might say something important.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “The reason they call if ‘golf’ is that all the other 4 letter words were used up.”

8. “The reason they call if ‘golf’ is that all the other 4 letter words were used up.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I don’t think anybody can really sit down and decide that their mission in life is to make people think. I think their mission in life is to leave people alone!”

9. “I don’t think anybody can really sit down and decide that their mission in life is to make people think. I think their mission in life is to leave people alone!”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I like that kind of ‘straight-faced’ comedy. I like to be straight-faced and outrageous.”

10. “I like that kind of ‘straight-faced’ comedy. I like to be straight-faced and outrageous.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “One thing a person won’t do when he’s laughing is try to beat you up.”

11. “One thing a person won’t do when he’s laughing is try to beat you up.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I’m sure that we can handle this situation maturely, just like the responsible adults that we are. Isn’t that right, Mr. Poopy Pants?”

12. “I’m sure that we can handle this situation maturely, just like the responsible adults that we are. Isn’t that right, Mr. Poopy Pants?”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I’ve finally found my home – as Lt. Frank Drebin.”

13. “I’ve finally found my home – as Lt. Frank Drebin.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Shirley! Don’t call me Shirley!”

14. “Shirley! Don’t call me Shirley!”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Yes, it’s true, I’ve been called the Laurence Olivier of spoofs. I guess that would make Laurence Olivier the Leslie Nielsen of Shakespeare.”

15. “Yes, it’s true, I’ve been called the Laurence Olivier of spoofs. I guess that would make Laurence Olivier the Leslie Nielsen of Shakespeare.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I have always loved science fiction. One of my favorite shows is ‘Star Trek.’ I like the trips, where it drops my mind off, because they give you a premise and all of a sudden, you say, ‘Oh!’ and I’m fascinated by it.”

16. “I have always loved science fiction. One of my favorite shows is ‘Star Trek.’ I like the trips, where it drops my mind off, because they give you a premise and all of a sudden, you say, ‘Oh!’ and I’m fascinated by it.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “The actual distance a bad golfer is going to hit the ball with any club obviously depends on many factors, not the least of which is whether the ball was actually hit at all.”

17. “The actual distance a bad golfer is going to hit the ball with any club obviously depends on many factors, not the least of which is whether the ball was actually hit at all.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Sometimes integrity is a punch in the face.”

18. “Sometimes integrity is a punch in the face.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Are you having problems hearing? If so, those around you already know it. Hearing loss is no laughing matter, so don’t be a punchline.”

19. “Are you having problems hearing? If so, those around you already know it. Hearing loss is no laughing matter, so don’t be a punchline.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “When you see Charlie Chaplin, he stays funny. He doesn’t become drama, and so what really seems to endure is comedy.”

20. “When you see Charlie Chaplin, he stays funny. He doesn’t become drama, and so what really seems to endure is comedy.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I’m a professional actor. If I was a plumber, I wouldn’t just do my plumbing in Beverly Hills bathrooms; I’d like to install air conditioning units and a few other things.”

21. “I’m a professional actor. If I was a plumber, I wouldn’t just do my plumbing in Beverly Hills bathrooms; I’d like to install air conditioning units and a few other things.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I love comedy and I hope I never stop doing it.”

22. “I love comedy and I hope I never stop doing it.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “It’s been dawning on me slowly that for the past 35 years I have been cast against type, and I’m finally getting to do what I really wanted to do.”

23. “It’s been dawning on me slowly that for the past 35 years I have been cast against type, and I’m finally getting to do what I really wanted to do.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “It’s not really that I’ve been an advocate for hearing aids for a long time, it’s just that I’ve been losing my hearing for a long time! So it’s actually very important for me because I’m actually hearing impaired and I simply want to hear better!”

24. “It’s not really that I’ve been an advocate for hearing aids for a long time, it’s just that I’ve been losing my hearing for a long time! So it’s actually very important for me because I’m actually hearing impaired and I simply want to hear better!”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Those who the gods seek to destroy first, learn how to play golf.”

25. “Those who the gods seek to destroy first, learn how to play golf.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “Any sport that comes from Scotland is good!”

26. “Any sport that comes from Scotland is good!”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “The violence or the vaudeville style of comedy is a technique all by itself. You get up there, and you are a comedian, and you’re doing one thing. That is, you’re going to make the audience laugh.”

27. “The violence or the vaudeville style of comedy is a technique all by itself. You get up there, and you are a comedian, and you’re doing one thing. That is, you’re going to make the audience laugh.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “The reason there’s a question mark on my front door is just in case I forget my address.”

28. “The reason there’s a question mark on my front door is just in case I forget my address.”

— Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen Quote: “I played a lot of leaders, autocratic sorts; perhaps it was my Canadian accent.”

29. “I played a lot of leaders, autocratic sorts; perhaps it was my Canadian accent.”

— Leslie Nielsen

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