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Top 30 Mark Wolynn Quotes (2025 Update)

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Even when we care for ill or elderly parents, providing what they cannot do for themselves, it is important to preserve and respect the integrity of the parent-child relationship, rather than diminish our parents’ dignity.”

1. “Even when we care for ill or elderly parents, providing what they cannot do for themselves, it is important to preserve and respect the integrity of the parent-child relationship, rather than diminish our parents’ dignity.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “When entangled, you unconsciously carry the feelings, symptoms, behaviors, or hardships of an earlier member of your family system as if these were your own.”

2. “When entangled, you unconsciously carry the feelings, symptoms, behaviors, or hardships of an earlier member of your family system as if these were your own.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Remaining silent about family pain is rarely an effective strategy for healing it. The suffering will surface again at a later time, often expressing in the fears or symptoms of a later generation.”

3. “Remaining silent about family pain is rarely an effective strategy for healing it. The suffering will surface again at a later time, often expressing in the fears or symptoms of a later generation.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Sometimes, the heart must break in order to open.”

4. “Sometimes, the heart must break in order to open.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “What I failed to realize at the time is that when we try to resist feeling something painful, we often protract the very pain we’re trying to avoid. Doing so is a prescription for continued suffering. There’s also something about the action of searching that blocks us from what we seek. The constant looking outside of ourselves can keep us from knowing when we hit the target. Something valuable can be going on inside us, but if we’re not tuning in, we can miss it.”

5. “What I failed to realize at the time is that when we try to resist feeling something painful, we often protract the very pain we’re trying to avoid. Doing so is a prescription for continued suffering. There’s also something about the action of searching that blocks us from what we seek. The constant looking outside of ourselves can keep us from knowing when we hit the target. Something valuable can be going on inside us, but if we’re not tuning in, we can miss it.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “A child who takes care of a parent often forges a lifelong pattern of overextension and creates a blueprint for habitually feeling overwhelmed.”

6. “A child who takes care of a parent often forges a lifelong pattern of overextension and creates a blueprint for habitually feeling overwhelmed.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “The emotions, traits, and behaviors we reject in our parents will likely live on in us. It’s our unconscious way of loving them, a way to bring them back into our lives.”

7. “The emotions, traits, and behaviors we reject in our parents will likely live on in us. It’s our unconscious way of loving them, a way to bring them back into our lives.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “What I failed to realize at the time is that when we try to resist feeling something painful, we often protract the very pain we’re trying to avoid.”

8. “What I failed to realize at the time is that when we try to resist feeling something painful, we often protract the very pain we’re trying to avoid.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Write it down as it comes to you. For example, you may carry a fear of something terrible happening to you in the future. It doesn’t matter what comes out; just keep writing. If nothing comes, answer this one question: If the feeling or symptom or condition you have never goes away, what would you be afraid could happen to you? Don’t continue reading until you’ve written down your most pressing concern.”

9. “Write it down as it comes to you. For example, you may carry a fear of something terrible happening to you in the future. It doesn’t matter what comes out; just keep writing. If nothing comes, answer this one question: If the feeling or symptom or condition you have never goes away, what would you be afraid could happen to you? Don’t continue reading until you’ve written down your most pressing concern.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “In chapter 5, we learned how our vitality – the life force that comes to us from our parents – can become blocked when our connection to them is compromised.”

10. “In chapter 5, we learned how our vitality – the life force that comes to us from our parents – can become blocked when our connection to them is compromised.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “There is often sadness hibernating beneath your angry words. The sadness won’t kill you. The anger actually might.”

11. “There is often sadness hibernating beneath your angry words. The sadness won’t kill you. The anger actually might.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Ignoring the pain actually deepens it. What is hidden from sight often increases in intensity.”

12. “Ignoring the pain actually deepens it. What is hidden from sight often increases in intensity.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Everything that happens to us has merit, whether we recognize the surface significance of it or not.”

13. “Everything that happens to us has merit, whether we recognize the surface significance of it or not.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “As small children, we develop our sense of self gradually. Back then, we had not learned how to be separate from our parents and be connected to them at the same time. In this innocent place, perhaps we imagined that we could alleviate their unhappiness by fixing or sharing it. If we too carried it, they wouldn’t have to carry it alone. But this is fantasized thinking, and it only leads to more unhappiness.”

14. “As small children, we develop our sense of self gradually. Back then, we had not learned how to be separate from our parents and be connected to them at the same time. In this innocent place, perhaps we imagined that we could alleviate their unhappiness by fixing or sharing it. If we too carried it, they wouldn’t have to carry it alone. But this is fantasized thinking, and it only leads to more unhappiness.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “If you look deeply into the palm of your hand, you will see your parents and all generations of your ancestors. All of them are alive in this moment. Each is present in your body. You are the continuation of each of these people. – Thich Nhat Hanh, A Lifetime of Peace.”

15. “If you look deeply into the palm of your hand, you will see your parents and all generations of your ancestors. All of them are alive in this moment. Each is present in your body. You are the continuation of each of these people. – Thich Nhat Hanh, A Lifetime of Peace.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “When family members lead unhappy lives or suffer an extremely difficult fate, it’s often easier to reject them than to feel the pain of loving them. Anger is often an easier emotion to feel than sadness.”

16. “When family members lead unhappy lives or suffer an extremely difficult fate, it’s often easier to reject them than to feel the pain of loving them. Anger is often an easier emotion to feel than sadness.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “As the adage goes, history is written by the victors, penned by those who remain to tell it. No matter how skewed or one-sided the story, many of us rarely think to question what that story would look like if told by the other side.”

17. “As the adage goes, history is written by the victors, penned by those who remain to tell it. No matter how skewed or one-sided the story, many of us rarely think to question what that story would look like if told by the other side.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “When we cut ourselves off from our parents, the qualities we view as negative in them can express in us unconsciously.”

18. “When we cut ourselves off from our parents, the qualities we view as negative in them can express in us unconsciously.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “The words we use to describe our worries and struggles can say more than we realize.”

19. “The words we use to describe our worries and struggles can say more than we realize.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “When suffering confounds us, we need to ask ourselves: whose feelings am I actually living?”

20. “When suffering confounds us, we need to ask ourselves: whose feelings am I actually living?”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “By developing a relationship with the painful parts of ourselves – parts we have often inherited from our family – we have an opportunity to shift them. Qualities like cruelty can become the source of our kindness; our judgments can forge the foundation of our compassion.”

21. “By developing a relationship with the painful parts of ourselves – parts we have often inherited from our family – we have an opportunity to shift them. Qualities like cruelty can become the source of our kindness; our judgments can forge the foundation of our compassion.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Until we uncover the actual triggering event in our family history, we can relive fears and feelings that don’t belong to us – unconscious fragments of a trauma – and we will think they’re ours.”

22. “Until we uncover the actual triggering event in our family history, we can relive fears and feelings that don’t belong to us – unconscious fragments of a trauma – and we will think they’re ours.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “It’s important to restate: not all behaviors expressed by us actually originate from us. They can easily belong to family members who came before us. We can merely be carrying the feelings for them or sharing them. We call these “identification feelings.”

23. “It’s important to restate: not all behaviors expressed by us actually originate from us. They can easily belong to family members who came before us. We can merely be carrying the feelings for them or sharing them. We call these “identification feelings.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Cutting off can make you feel free at first, but it’s the false freedom of a childhood defense. Ultimately, it will limit your life experience.”

24. “Cutting off can make you feel free at first, but it’s the false freedom of a childhood defense. Ultimately, it will limit your life experience.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Viewed in this way, the traumas we inherit or experience firsthand can not only create a legacy of distress, but also forge a legacy of strength and resilience that can be felt for generations to come.”

25. “Viewed in this way, the traumas we inherit or experience firsthand can not only create a legacy of distress, but also forge a legacy of strength and resilience that can be felt for generations to come.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “I’ve noticed that if several siblings have breaks in the mother-child bond, they’ll often express anger or jealousy, or feel disconnected from one another.”

26. “I’ve noticed that if several siblings have breaks in the mother-child bond, they’ll often express anger or jealousy, or feel disconnected from one another.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Sleeping inside each of them were fragments of traumas too great to be resolved in one generation.”

27. “Sleeping inside each of them were fragments of traumas too great to be resolved in one generation.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Perhaps your mother carried a wound from her mother and was unable to give you what she didn’t get. Her parenting skills would be limited by what she did not receive from her parents.”

28. “Perhaps your mother carried a wound from her mother and was unable to give you what she didn’t get. Her parenting skills would be limited by what she did not receive from her parents.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “The greater truth would be that the love you longed for was not available for your mother to give.”

29. “The greater truth would be that the love you longed for was not available for your mother to give.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “Younger children often, though not always, seem to do a bit better than first children, or only children, who seem to carry a bigger portion of unfinished business from the family history.”

30. “Younger children often, though not always, seem to do a bit better than first children, or only children, who seem to carry a bigger portion of unfinished business from the family history.”

— Mark Wolynn

Mark Wolynn Quote: “The notion that we inherit and “relive” aspects of family trauma has been the subject of many books by the renowned German psychotherapist Bert Hellinger.”

31. “The notion that we inherit and “relive” aspects of family trauma has been the subject of many books by the renowned German psychotherapist Bert Hellinger.”

— Mark Wolynn

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