Top 50 Michael Buckley Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “You can’t judge the many by the actions of the few.”

— Michael Buckley

2. “The night is young, and by the grace of magic, so are we.”

— Michael Buckley

3. “Please, don’t hate me because I am beautiful.”

— Michael Buckley

4. “The world is always ruled by a maniac. – Baba Yaga.”

— Michael Buckley

5. “The only bad ideas are the ones never tried.”

— Michael Buckley

6. “Trickster, love will be the end of you.”

— Michael Buckley

7. “If you want a happy ending you have to go out and take it.”

— Michael Buckley

8. “Don’t disrespect the sword marshmallow.”

— Michael Buckley

9. “I’m going to teach you the art of swordsmanship-or in other words, how to totally kill someone with a sharp, pointy thing.”

— Michael Buckley

10. “That woman is hiding something!” she said. “You think everyone’s hiding something.” “And you would hug the devil if he gave you cookies.”

— Michael Buckley

11. “That’s why crazy people are so dangerous. You think they’re nice until they’re chaining you up in the garage.”

— Michael Buckley

12. “Welcome to the party,” I say to them as more and more people gather to watch. “I’m telling my friends here that we have to fight together. We have to look after one another. This is about the end of the world, and we have to put aside our hate and fear of one another. If we can’t learn to stand together by tomorrow, we’ll all be lying together dead.” – Lyric.”

— Michael Buckley

13. “I’m the smartest person I know and I’ve never read a book in my life.”

— Michael Buckley

14. “If only he can get over becoming a NERD.”

— Michael Buckley

15. “If we have to get married and have a million babies, I hope our relationship will be built on mutual disgust and an endless barrage of ridicule and insults. It feels like the only thing I can count on right now. I don’t want something dumb like respect and affection getting in the way.”

— Michael Buckley

16. “Wendell turned to the chalkboard and wrote I AM A WORTHLESS FAT-BODY.”

— Michael Buckley

17. “Puck was a genuine pain in the butt, but he had powers and those powers made him useful.”

— Michael Buckley

18. “Animals shouldn’t eat gumdrops! They shouldn’t drink tea or chocolate milk, either.”

— Michael Buckley

19. “And a utility belt! I’m like an asthmatic Batman!”

— Michael Buckley

20. “When did you suddenly become Mister Maturity?”

— Michael Buckley

21. “How ironic, she thought, as she fell to her certain death, that at that moment she would have given anything to be a giant goose again.”

— Michael Buckley

22. “Nothing like a puppet to give you the willies.”

— Michael Buckley

23. “But know this, if you get killed out there I’m going to fire you.”

— Michael Buckley

24. “So this fairy tale is a horror story.”

— Michael Buckley

25. “Save the people you love, who cares about the rest of the world? – Uncle Jake.”

— Michael Buckley

26. “The Big Bad Wolf is asking for my help? The Devil must have his long underwear on today.”

— Michael Buckley

27. “Sabrina suggested they burn their orange monkey sweaters and blue heart covered pants but Daphne refused. Granny took Sabrina aside and apologised for the outfit, saying that Mr. Canis might not have been the right choice to shop for girls. After all, he was colour-blind.”

— Michael Buckley

28. “You sick, twisted monster,” Sabrina seethed at Pinocchio.”

— Michael Buckley

29. “I mean, if you could have a wizard grant a wish, would you waste it on going to Kansas?”

— Michael Buckley

30. “I’m going to give you a sentence, a full sentence with a noun and a verb and a possible agitate. I don’t like all these judges running around with their half baked sentences, thats how you get salmonella poisoning.”

— Michael Buckley

31. “Listen Relda, stop meddling in our affairs or you’re going to regret it,” said the mayor. “If you don’t want me meddling, then you must really do a better job of covering up your mistakes.”

— Michael Buckley

32. “I feel like a movie star,” Daphne said as the girls hurried downstairs. “You look like a mental patient,” Sabrina remarked.”

— Michael Buckley

33. “But most disturbing were his eyes, as they changed into an achingly bright blue color. The same color Canis’s eyes were in the picture Sabrina had found of her family.”

— Michael Buckley

34. “You are a terrible human being,” Daphne croaked. “Woof!” the dog agreed.”

— Michael Buckley

35. “Oh really? How about Ms. Longdon, who swore her toilet was haunted?” said Sabrina.”

— Michael Buckley

36. “He did something so un-Pucklike, Sabrina couldn’t believe it. He got up sat behind her, and let his enormous fairy wings sprout from his back. Then he wrapped them around her to keep the bitter cold away. It was the first truly nice thing the so-called Trickster King had ever done for her.”

— Michael Buckley

37. “I look around at the beach where I grew up. This is where everything changed for me. I was just a girl who happened to witness the arrival of a strange race of people from under the sea. One of them was the most beautiful person I ever met. He walked out of the ocean and changed my life forever. – Lyric.”

— Michael Buckley

38. “Pfefferkuchenhaus.”

— Michael Buckley

39. “I hear noises coming from his mouth but they don’t sound like words,” Daphne said.”

— Michael Buckley

40. “You want me to be your boyfriend, don’t you?” Puck taunted. His wings suddenly popped out of his back and he swooped over to Sabrina. Before she knew how to react, the boy kissed her on the lips. A million thoughts ran through Sabrina’s head at once. Puck was annoying. He had dumped her in vats of disgusting glop. He’d put creepy crawlers in her bed. But the most awful thought of them all was the one about the kiss – it was nice.”

— Michael Buckley

41. “Each time she applied her lip gloss, she imagined another fleet of brain cells dying a horrible death.”

— Michael Buckley

42. “And who are you supposed to be? the King of snot-nosed delinquents?”

— Michael Buckley

43. “Are you familiar with that play? In fact, we’re almost living it!”

— Michael Buckley

44. “Keep your distance, men. Don’t be fooled into believing that our enemies are helpless. These ‘girls’, as they call themselves are a crafty bunch. I’ve see inside the thing they call a ‘purse’. It is filled with all kinds of toxic sprays and pointy things they wouldn’t hesitate unleashed on us.”

— Michael Buckley

45. “I was going to say he’s aimless,” the witch replied. “I know he’s a bit old to be old to living at home with his mom, but he’s had a difficult time holding a job. He’s worked at Wendy’s, Taco Bell, and Burger King, but it all ends the same way- he challenges his manager to combat, takes over the restaurant, and enslaves his coworkers. Then it’s back to video games.” – Morgan le Fay.”

— Michael Buckley

46. “New York City is a place where everyone lived on top of each other, and that was exactly how Sabrina liked it. Living out in the middle of nowhere was dangerous and suspicious.”

— Michael Buckley

47. “The library spilled onto the floor and into the other rooms. Some books held up wobbly tables, others were literally swept under the rug. Sabrina had once found a book inside the toilet tank.”

— Michael Buckley

48. “Sabrina shook off her surprise and together they took turns kicking the stranger.”

— Michael Buckley

49. “There, snug as a bug in a rug!” the old woman hollered. “I love dolphins, too!” Daphne exclaimed. “Not since I hurt my toes!” Mrs. Grimm shouted.”

— Michael Buckley

50. “But, Dad! We can’t leave. Uncle Jake is hurt!” Daphne said. “Besides, that’s Pinocchio. I want to get an autograph.”

— Michael Buckley