Top 4 Patrick C. Harrison III Quotes (2026 Update)

1. “If they have tattoos, they screw. This is true of men and women alike. If they smoke, they poke. Also true, studies show.”

— Patrick C. Harrison III

2. “She’s too old anyway and appears to have arthritis, which can hinder a woman’s ability to jerk off her male counterpart.”

— Patrick C. Harrison III

3. “0.001752% of relationships end in homicide.”

— Patrick C. Harrison III

4. “I also throw things when the opportunity arises; like if a cat walks into my yard, I’ll throw it into the street.”

— Patrick C. Harrison III

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