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Top 8 Paul Provenza Quotes (2025 Update)

Paul Provenza Quote: “If I had the flag that Betsy Ross worked so hard on, I wouldn’t destroy it. I’d put it up on EBay because it’s gotta be worth some serious coin. And that is the American way.”
Paul Provenza Quote: “Children in a third world country. That’s how we spread democracy.”
Paul Provenza Quote: “There is no democrats or republicans, right or left, red state or blue state. We are all one. And we are all unified against Mexicans.”
Paul Provenza Quote: “I actually go to church. I know it’s hard for you to believe. It’s only because you know that Jesus on the cross? I love his smooth hairless body.”
Paul Provenza Quote: “I actually had to leave the country for infractions to fall off my record.”
Paul Provenza Quote: “We didn’t choose the joke because it’s filthy! We chose it because of the structure!”
Paul Provenza Quote: “As a comedian, I’m like one of those on-the-scene reporters. I will actually go and try to find disasters so I can write jokes as the disasters unfold.”
Paul Provenza Quote: “Some performers are brilliant comedians, some are genius musicians, and some just make you happy to be alive. THE BOBS are all of that – and then some.”
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