Top 180 Rachel Hawkins Quotes (2025 Update)
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51. “Jenna and Vix laughed at that and, after making me promise to hang out with them tomorrow, practically waltzed out the door. I felt like there should have been rainbows and rose petals in their wake or something. Ugh. That was catty.”

— Rachel Hawkins

52. “SGA president, huh?“ he asked. “So can I call you Pres?”

— Rachel Hawkins

53. “Deep-fried Oreos were sent from heaven to prove God loves us.”

— Rachel Hawkins

54. “I was panting slightly, thanks to trying to keep up with him. Stupid short legs.”

— Rachel Hawkins

55. “Then, like I wasn’t thrown enough, Cal leaned down and picked up a potted African violet on the low table next to the sofa and brought it over to me. For a second, I wondered if this was his socially awkward way of trying to give me flowers.”

— Rachel Hawkins

56. “I decided not to wear makeup, figuring the more innocent I looked, the harder it might be for him to ground me, or shoot hellfire from his eyes, or whatever it was that angry demon dads did.”

— Rachel Hawkins

57. “I should say upfront that I have never been in a cellar in my life. In fact, I can see no reason why anyone should ever go into a cellar unless there is wine involved.”

— Rachel Hawkins

58. “Where the heck was I while you were playing Grand Theft Cellar?”

— Rachel Hawkins

59. “Oh, God, if that’s where this woman had gotten her Sophie Mercer gossip, I was surprised she’d greeted me with a handshake instead of an exorcism.”

— Rachel Hawkins

60. “By now, all three Brannick women – all four, if you counted Mom – were staring at me. Man, what had that piney-tasting stuff been? The Brannick version of Red Bull?”

— Rachel Hawkins

61. “Jenna slipped in wearing an outfit that I can only describe as Hello Kitty Goes Goth.”

— Rachel Hawkins

62. “Gossip is tricky, slippery. Pretend to be too interested, and suddenly you look suspicious.”

— Rachel Hawkins

63. “She was wearing a bright purple dress that was so short, I thought it might have started its life as a shirt. She would’ve been pretty if her face hadn’t looked like she’d just taken a big swig of sour milk.”

— Rachel Hawkins

64. “Dad goes back inside, and I smile as I watch him go. I’ve missed having my parents around, which is a sentiment that might get me kicked out of teendom, but it’s the truth. No matter how embarrassing my dad might be, how distracted my mom always is, they love us. They’re easy to be around, and they’ve only ever wanted us to be healthy and happy. In that way, we’re a lot luckier than the royals.”

— Rachel Hawkins

65. “Looking back, none of this would have happened if I’d brought lip gloss the night of the Homecoming Dance.”

— Rachel Hawkins

66. “No, the best thing to do was to get the heck out of the bathroom and find a teacher, or a cop, or an exorcist. I’d take anyone at this point.”

— Rachel Hawkins

67. “Most girls have to be talked out of texting an ex, and here I was using freaking magic to summon back a dude who had, for all intents and purposes, dumped me. I.”

— Rachel Hawkins

68. “We’re going to the Underworld,” Izzy said. She bounced a little as she said it, her eyes bright and her tone implying that “the Underworld” was akin to “Candy Land.”

— Rachel Hawkins

69. “It’s not cool to stare, I know that, but this is literally the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen in my life.”

— Rachel Hawkins

70. “Houses are like boats,” Aunt May had sniffed. “They should always keep their original names.”

— Rachel Hawkins

71. “But leaning against him, crying into his stupid tweed, I thought I could maybe stay there forever. It was such a relief to be able to sob and have someone know all the reasons why.”

— Rachel Hawkins

72. “There was a light knock at the door. Cal let go of my arm and we jumped about six feel apart as Lara eased the door open. If Mrs. Casnoff had caught Cal in my bedroom back at Hecate – with the door closed, and me still in my pajamas – I had a feeling there would have been steely glares, pursed lips, and words like “wildly inappropriate”.”

— Rachel Hawkins

73. “Well, that explained it, then. Secret demon hunter and thief. Man, did I know how to pick ’em.”

— Rachel Hawkins

74. “Perhaps the most defining characteristic of a superhero is a willingness to sacrifice for the good of others, even to the point of laying down his or her own life.”

— Rachel Hawkins

75. “I met a queen once,” Dad muses. “She tried to put her hand down my trousers.” Dad looks over at me and raises his eyebrows. “Surely this can’t go any worse than that.”

— Rachel Hawkins

76. “Oh, don’t worry about it,” I said, trying to sound normal even though all I really wanted to do was run inside the garage and try to lift my dad’s SUV. You know, for scientific purposes.”

— Rachel Hawkins

77. “Dad, she’s just going to freak. And probably come here and get me, and then you guys will start yelling at each other, and I’ll have to act out by wearing lots of eyeliner and doing the drugs.”

— Rachel Hawkins

78. “Honestly, not enough people know how to use good manners as a weapon.”

— Rachel Hawkins

79. “Only for us would unweird be weird.”

— Rachel Hawkins

80. “As I looked around the room at all these people-my family-excitement thrummed through me. Yes, this might go down in history as the stupidest thing I’d ever done, but it felt so good to have a plan that I didn’t care if it was a bad one.”

— Rachel Hawkins

81. “You. Are. The. Worst,” I enunciate, pointing at her. “What’s so hard about your life? Oh, boo-hoo, you’re missing a fashion show. Oh no, your parents want you to have a good and interesting education. What a shame, you have two of them, and they both care about you.”

— Rachel Hawkins

82. “I’m Dexter O’Neil, Mrs. Brannick,” Dex said, offering his hand to shake. “And I’m hoping you’ll adopt me.”

— Rachel Hawkins

83. “My girl has a point,” Archer said, smiling at me. Now my cheeks didn’t just ache, they burned.”

— Rachel Hawkins

84. “I was just about to get up when Dad rushed into the kitchen. He was in pajamas, which was totally bizarre. Dad never came down to breakfast until he was completely dressed. Of course, his pajamas even had a little pocket and handkerchief, so maybe he felt dressed.”

— Rachel Hawkins

85. “Bruce Wayne’s parents get killed and he goes to Tibet or whatever, and Superman is an alien, and Spiderman had that radioactive spider. Me? I kissed a janitor in the school bathroom.”

— Rachel Hawkins

86. “He’d taken all this weirdness and done the same thing I’d managed to do with it: take it in, feel crazy for a little bit, and then deal.”

— Rachel Hawkins

87. “Ryan rolled his eyes. “Harper, you and David Stark have been circling each other since kindergarden.”

— Rachel Hawkins

88. “If I’d had any doubts about how Archer felt about me, they were eradicated when I saw the look on his face. I’d never had my spleen ripped out, but if I had, I figured I’d make the same face Archer wore now.”

— Rachel Hawkins

89. “He just showed up like a posh vampire I accidentally invited in, then couldn’t make leave.”

— Rachel Hawkins

90. “Once you’ve watched grown men chase greased pigs, it’s hard to find anything that actually seems scuzzier. Bee.”

— Rachel Hawkins

91. “I don’t know what heaven smells like, but if it doesn’t smell like freshly baked cookies, I will be really disappointed.”

— Rachel Hawkins

92. “I didn’t exactly relish the idea of getting a tattoo, trust me. It was right up there with blue hair.”

— Rachel Hawkins

93. “I told you, I suck at this. It’s like any time I try to do a spell, it goes all big and scary and explodey...”

— Rachel Hawkins

94. “You always have a lot going on Harper. It’s like your thing. When you die in a hundred years, they’ll probably write on your gravestone, ‘Here lies Harper Price-Dang it, She Still had Stuff To Do!”

— Rachel Hawkins

95. “It’s always going to get better someday. Sometime in the future, things won’t be so crazy.”

— Rachel Hawkins

96. “You know,” someone said off to my left, “I usually find a blocking spell to be a lot more effective than yelling ‘Bad dog,’ but maybe that’s just me.”

— Rachel Hawkins

97. “Auburn Tigers T-shirt.”

— Rachel Hawkins

98. “It’s so obnoxious when you’re right about stuff.”

— Rachel Hawkins

99. “No, what surprises me is the sudden, jolting, and undeniable realization that even though I didn’t want to, I’ve fallen for an actual princess.”

— Rachel Hawkins

100. “I wish we could go to the movies.”

— Rachel Hawkins