Top 90 Shannon Mayer Quotes (2025 Update)
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51. “Sometimes the world pushes us in a direction we think is wrong, because it is not of our choosing. That does not mean it is taking us to the wrong destination, just that the path is one we didn’t foresee.”

— Shannon Mayer

52. “Every girl needs a girlfriend to drink with who won’t tell your stage-whispered secrets to anyone else. Sometimes that girl is your own age, and sometimes she isn’t.”

— Shannon Mayer

53. “There is power in words, both written and spoken,” Shem said. “I suggest you be more careful with them. While you may not feel it, or sense it, you are shaping the world around you.”

— Shannon Mayer

54. “Sorry, wandered off in my head, fell off the path, and got sucked down the hole of where the hell did I go wrong in my own love life?”

— Shannon Mayer

55. “Nothing like acting like a jackass to kill whatever good looks God blessed you with.”

— Shannon Mayer

56. “I was alone, my thoughts my only companion. A most dangerous companion indeed.”

— Shannon Mayer

57. “Memories could cut you down and eat you alive if you let them.”

— Shannon Mayer

58. “Hatred will blind you,” Lila said, her words careful, “it will blind you to the good in people, the good worth seeing. They don’t have to be on our side to be good, and they don’t have to be on their side to be bad.”

— Shannon Mayer

59. “Where there is no incentive to understand, most do not strive to do so. Natural ability does not equate to excellence.”

— Shannon Mayer

60. “I would raze a thousand cities and let the world burn to keep you at my side.” That should not have made me smile. “Then don’t ask me to do less.”

— Shannon Mayer

61. “We often keep our secrets closer to protect those we love, but then we end up hurting them. It’s a common issue.”

— Shannon Mayer

62. “You will always be the smaller opponent, and being a woman, you will be underestimated. When you fight, fight with everything you’ve got and let them think you’re crazy. Let them fear the fact that you’re a woman. That you are unpredictable.”

— Shannon Mayer

63. “Four vampires on our side, four very old and very angry vampires on the other. Like some sadistic version of red rover, red rover, let’s call the weak one over and eat her.”

— Shannon Mayer

64. “I sighed. “Penny, men will be the death of me. Because I’ll tell them to swim when they are drowning, and they will have nothing but one breath of air, and they’ll use it to tell me that they are not drowning and they don’t have to listen to me.”

— Shannon Mayer

65. “If I’d learned anything at the ripe old age of forty-one, it was that no dream could last forever, and no man can save you from yourself.”

— Shannon Mayer

66. “Love all, trust few, and do wrong to none,” he said. “Will Shakespeare got it close, but maybe it should be love deeply the one you love, trust few, and do wrong only to those who need an ass kicking.”

— Shannon Mayer

67. “For all intents and purposes, I was invisible. I mean, a forty-year-old woman often was, but this was taking it to a whole new level.”

— Shannon Mayer

68. “Let’s be honest, don’t we all want to achieve our perfect weight after one workout, and then get offended when it doesn’t happen?”

— Shannon Mayer

69. “We have problems in spades and no shovels to dig our own graves.”

— Shannon Mayer

70. “Jaysus, my life was complete. I’d heard a werewolf oink like pig and I could die happy now.”

— Shannon Mayer

71. “Strange, isn’t it, how the heart can break into tiny pieces, yet even when the wound is fresh we can still be drawn to another who perhaps is a better fit for us. Sometimes the heart knows better than we know ourselves what we need.”

— Shannon Mayer

72. “I’d never had kids – not for lack of trying – but that meant I’d had little experience with the sleep deprivation camp that children put their mothers through. Sure, sure, dads too, but let’s be real. Whose boob are they latched on to? Not daddy-o’s.”

— Shannon Mayer

73. “Help is rare. Knowledge, rarer. Show, tell, figure. Sight may come.”

— Shannon Mayer

74. “He shrugged. “It’s a good saying. Not if. When. That’s life. Not if you die. When. Not if you fall in love. When. Not if you get your heart broken. When.”

— Shannon Mayer

75. “I swallowed hard. “You shouldn’t do that.” “Why not?” I went with complete honesty. “My clothes will fall off.”

— Shannon Mayer

76. “Emotions were as messy as a kid with finger-paint, and about as predictable.”

— Shannon Mayer

77. “Rules and free will, they are a juxtaposition that has existed from the beginning of time.”

— Shannon Mayer

78. “Death is nothing. Fear is nothing. The past is nothing. I am nothing. I am death.”

— Shannon Mayer

79. “My hand brushed over a card that stuck to the tip of my index finger. I slid it out, face down, and pushed it across the table to her. “That was impressive,” she said softly. I shrugged. “Like I said, not my first time.” “That’s what she said,” Sarge mumbled. I shot him a look and realized Annie had done the same thing.”

— Shannon Mayer

80. “If I’d wanted to insult you, I’d have mentioned the hovel you live in, the terribly made clothing you wear, or the obvious disdain you have for your appearance. Things you have the power to change. I.”

— Shannon Mayer

81. “Only mostly dead,” I whispered. Neither of them so much as batted an eye at me. Apparently I was the only one who’d seen The Princess Bride. Before I could say “you killed my father, prepare to die,” scalding hot tea filled my mouth.”

— Shannon Mayer

82. “They did squats holding weights; I just squatted and prayed I wouldn’t pee my nice new pants.”

— Shannon Mayer

83. “Sleep is something not to be taken lightly, especially if you are over forty. So many things can disrupt it. Aching muscles and joints. The need to pee. Bad dreams. Hot flashes. Dry mouth. A raging werewolf.”

— Shannon Mayer

84. “I am afraid. But if I’ve learned anything, it’s that all fear does is slow you down and make you want to lie flat on your back, tits to the sky.”

— Shannon Mayer

85. “I like my ladies with a bit of fire and a bit of badass, and a whole lotta legs.”

— Shannon Mayer

86. “At another time I would have felt embarrassed to be attracted to two men at once. But that was then, and I was a new kind of cougar.”

— Shannon Mayer

87. “I couldn’t bear the thought of that happening to me. I did not want to be wanted for a period of time and then cast aside when life got hard.”

— Shannon Mayer

88. “Eric,” I said. “I came out to see you. And I got lost.” “In his mouth?”

— Shannon Mayer

89. “I turned Skel and asked for more speed as we raced across the land of Faerie toward Goblin Town, a passed-out fae king against my back, an ousted goblin riding in front, and a skeleton’s finger bone tucked between my boobs. How could anything possibly go wrong?”

— Shannon Mayer

90. “Their eyes tracked me as I moved through the club, and I fought not to notice how many of them were next to naked. Or completely naked. A man wearing nothing but a leash sat at the feet of another man who petted his head, as if he were a dog.”

— Shannon Mayer