Top 40 Shirtaloon Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “I wake up every morning, proud of who I am,” he told them. “I go out into the world, never regretting that I didn’t at least try and be the person I want to be. I face dangers and make mistakes. Sometimes I get beat, and sometimes I win. I stand up for what I believe in, whatever it costs me. When you give everything, you have to be who you want to be, that’s freedom, whatever your circumstances.”

— Shirtaloon

2. “Don’t worry about him, Mose,” Humphrey said. “Just remember that if you’re talking to Jason and you get confused, he’s probably up to something. If you’re talking to Jason and you’re not confused, then he’s definitely up to something.”

— Shirtaloon

3. “Simple, however, is not the same thing as easy.”

— Shirtaloon

4. “Always either be modest or wildly self-aggrandising. Avoid anything in between, for there lies mediocrity.”

— Shirtaloon

5. “Then, figure out how to stay out of my sight, because if I ever see you again, I might just slap you so hard it changes your religion.”

— Shirtaloon

6. “People. Are. Vegetarians,” he yelled through gritted teeth. Every word punctuating a strike to the knee. “Vegetables. Aren’t. People-tarians!”

— Shirtaloon

7. “Are you saying your world’s better than mine?” Jason asked. “We have magic,” Gary said. “We have internet porn,” Jason said.”

— Shirtaloon

8. “Mate, this is the climactic battle and I’m the only one rocking the power of friendship. You’ve got no chance. You better knock out a back-story flashback toot-sweet or it’ll be a total walkover.”

— Shirtaloon

9. “Anisa gave Jason an unhappy glare. “You,” she said, making it sound like a swear word, “may address me as Priestess.” Jason didn’t care for being talked to like he was something scraped off the bottom of a boot. “Well you,” he said with an insolent grin, “may address me as Rakishly Handsome Jason.” “Excuse me?” Anisa said, barely believing what she just heard. “You’re excused,” Jason said pompously, as he looked away. “Just don’t let it happen again.”

— Shirtaloon

10. “This is Colin,” Jason said. “He needs a moment to gather himself together. When a super god was trying to possess me, he’s the one who had my back. He’s been with me from almost the very start and he has two purposes in life: adorable little dances and devouring every living thing on a planet.”

— Shirtaloon

11. “You want someone to get up, then you get up,” Neil said to Humphrey. “Alright, I will,” Humphrey said, then didn’t so much as twitch. “Am I up?” “No,” Belinda said. “Well, I tried,” Humphrey said. “At least I’ll be able to say I died valiantly.”

— Shirtaloon

12. “I need to go in the other room. This is getting awkward and I left my thinly-veiled excuse to leave you two alone in there.”

— Shirtaloon

13. “An interesting fact about the goddess of knowledge is that she knows everything that anyone in this world knows, including me. Which means she knows a bunch of Mario Kart shortcuts, which is kind of awesome.”

— Shirtaloon

14. “Did you check for an index?” Gary asked. Farrah’s eyes landed on Gary like attack dogs. “I guess there’s no time for research,” Gary said, heading for the stairs. “Let’s go,” Rufus said, following after Gary. Farrah watched them vanish down the steep staircase, then turned to the back of the book. Jason narrowed his eyes as he watched her. “Are you checking for an index?”

— Shirtaloon

15. “The street is in an extradimensional city I’m taking over so a hole doesn’t get blasted in the side of the universe. Mondays, am I right?”

— Shirtaloon

16. “I’m suddenly very sleepy. I don’t think being unconscious is actually very restful.”

— Shirtaloon

17. “When you’re just a face in the crowd, then you can hold an ideal without being required to live up to it.”

— Shirtaloon

18. “What about you, Mr Asano? What are you looking for in a woman?” “Evil genius,” Jason said casually. “Evil genius?” she asked, eyebrows raised. “Why not? Smart, confident, assertive, driven. What’s not to like?” “The evil?” Cassandra ventured. “That could be a problem long-term,” Jason acknowledged. “Maybe what I need is a naughty genius.” He thought it over for a moment as an impish grin took over his face. “Yeah,” he said, voice purring. “That sounds exactly right.”

— Shirtaloon

19. “Don’t muddy the waters unless muddy water is useful to you.”

— Shirtaloon

20. “People mostly fail at things because they balk at what they have to do. It’s not that the path isn’t there but that they aren’t willing to walk it.”

— Shirtaloon

21. “The opposite of good is easy. That may have been the moral of the last Harry Potter book, now that I think about it. Anyway, people don’t do bad things because there is some antagonistic force driving them to sin. They do them because when the right thing is hard, making little compromises doesn’t seem so bad. A shortcut here, a little selfishness when no one will ever know. Every step makes the next one a little easier.”

— Shirtaloon

22. “I decided early on that I was going to be who I am and people could take it or leave it. Like me or hate me, I’ll take passion over ambivalence. It lets me know who to avoid and who to be friends with. It makes for a better life.”

— Shirtaloon

23. “You’re still causing trouble,” the woman said to Jason. “First my son, now my daughter? They may have been worthless, but weren’t for the likes of you to kill.” “Not a lot of pictures up on your fridge, I’m guessing.”

— Shirtaloon

24. “You already know the question.” “Yet you must ask it. Only then will the responsibility for hearing the answer be yours.”

— Shirtaloon

25. “Does it make you feel better to disrespect things others find meaningful?”

— Shirtaloon

26. “We’re slowly phasing it out in favour of wealth-based oligarchy, but it’s still around.”

— Shirtaloon

27. “You should always welcome being proven wrong,” Jason said. “It means your understanding of the world just got a little bit better.”

— Shirtaloon

28. “I mean, look at us; we’re no deities, but still. A professional thief and a gold-rank adventurer? The most exciting person I knew at iron-rank was a guy named Brian who could conjure a huge metal duck.”

— Shirtaloon

29. “Do you have aristocracy in your world?” “Sure,” Jason said. “We’re slowly phasing it out in favour of wealth-based oligarchy, but it’s still around.”

— Shirtaloon

30. “He who fights with monsters should look to it that he does not become a monster?”

— Shirtaloon

31. “Oh yeah, I found religion, which is kind of a big deal. I didn’t join, but I found it.”

— Shirtaloon

32. “The trowel looked rather sinister, made out of some kind of black metal with a red sheen. It carried the wear marks of having been used as a planting tool, but also had a razor edge that seemed wholly unnecessary for gardening purposes. “Blood cult?” Jason read unhappily from the item description. “Who gardens with an evil trowel?”

— Shirtaloon

33. “Yes,” Jason said, “I’m not very smart and simple formalities are super-hard to figure out. It’s definitely not that I find them to be a set of arbitrary behavioural norms that serve as a tool of exclusionary tribalism and that eschewing the rituals of cultural performance facilitates the fostering of new relationships by having both sides step out of their preconceived societal modes.”

— Shirtaloon

34. “He leaned in, gently kissed her and stepped back, letting go of her hands. His eyes glistened with tears but he had a familiar, impish grin. “You’re going to miss me, Cassandra Mercer.” “I know.” He turned walked away, without looking back.”

— Shirtaloon

35. “You’ll have to earn how to fight,” Sophie said. Despite her best efforts, a smile was creeping onto her face. “I know how to fight,” Belinda said. “Kicking a guy in the beans and then running for it is not fighting.” “It got me this far.”

— Shirtaloon

36. “You know butlering isn’t a real genre right.” Jason said. “Given the real genres that is hardly an indictment.” Shade said. “I’m not responsible for the literary failings of your planet. Mister Asano.”

— Shirtaloon

37. “Of course,” Denji said, then shook his head. “After all this time, it’s not how this moment was meant to go.” “I wouldn’t worry about it,” Jason said. “Star Wars fans feel like this every time a new movie comes out.”

— Shirtaloon

38. “Are you a child?” Ernest asked. “Mate, we’re about to go flying across the desert in giant magic toboggans. If that doesn’t eke out any childlike wonder, then you might want to check your soul’s still in there.”

— Shirtaloon

39. “I’m afraid he’s unable to hear you from here, Mr Asano,” Shade said. “If it would save you time, I can explain to him myself that he’s a worthless aggregation of excrement whom the cosmos would be better for wiping off its shoe. Metaphorically speaking.” “I.”

— Shirtaloon

40. “It was tricky to put a wrist lock on something that didn’t have a wrist.”

— Shirtaloon

41. “Jason’s team was a collection of individuals who learned to dynamically reconfigure their approaches to build varying synergies that maximised their potential in any given circumstance.”

— Shirtaloon

42. “Look at the things he’s done. It’s clear how hard he’s trying to be a good man.” “Exactly,” Koya said. “Good men don’t have to try.”

— Shirtaloon