Top 50 THE CLOWN FACTORY Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “If stupidity was painful, you’d be in agony.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

2. “If you had one more brain cell, it would be lonely.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

3. “You look like something I’d draw with my left hand.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

4. “If I gave you a penny for your thoughts, I’d get change.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

5. “If you can’t laugh at yourself, I’d be glad to do so for you.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

6. “Someday you’ll find yourself, and will you be disappointed.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

7. “Do you want people to accept you as you are or do you want them to like you?”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

8. “I get so emotional when you’re not around. That emotion is happiness.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

9. “Anybody who told you to just be yourself couldn’t have given you worse advice.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

10. “I’d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

11. “I’ll never forget the first time we met, although I’ll keep trying.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

12. “You are so ugly that when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a ticket for littering.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

13. “You were so ugly when you were born that the doctor put tinted windows on your incubator.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

14. “You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

15. “Yo momma’s breath smells so bad I don’t know if I should give her a Tic Tac or a piece of toilet paper. Yo.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

16. “If brains were dynamite, you would not have enough to blow your nose.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

17. “As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

18. “You must be the arithmetic man – you add trouble, subtract pleasure, divide attention, and multiply ignorance.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

19. “Yo momma’s so old, when God said, “Let there be light,” she flipped the switch.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

20. “Baby, if you were words on a page you’d be what they call “fine print!”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

21. “I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

22. “It’s hard to get the big picture when you have such a small screen.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

23. “You couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel. 12.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

24. “Don’t let your mind wander... it’s far too small to wander on its own.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

25. “Yo momma’s so fat, she went to Red Lobster for endless shrimp last month and she’s still there.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

26. “She thinks she’s a siren, but she looks more like a false alarm.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

27. “I’d explain it to you, but I don’t have any crayons with me.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

28. “The last time I saw a face like yours I fed it a banana.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

29. “You’re a person of rare intelligence. It’s rare when you show any.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

30. “He is dark and handsome. When it’s dark, he’s handsome.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

31. “If you have something to say, raise your hand and place it over your mouth.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

32. “Yo momma’s breath smells so bad, it’s considered a weapon of mass destruction.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

33. “9. Yo Momma’s so Cheap Yo.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

34. “Yo momma’s breath smells so bad her teeth didn’t fall out, they ran away. Yo.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

35. “Yo momma’s so fat she sank the Titanic.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

36. “Yo momma’s so skinny I can blindfold her with dental floss.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

37. “Yo momma’s so ugly, when we went to a haunted house, she came out with a paycheck. Yo momma’s so ugly, when she was doing door-to-door sales, someone told her it wasn’t Halloween yet.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

38. “Yo momma’s so stupid, when I was drowning and yelled for a life saver she asked, “Cherry or grape?”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

39. “Yo momma’s so fat, when we went to a kid’s birthday party, everyone thought she was the bounce house.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

40. “I’m not offended by what you say. I’m just glad that you’re stringing words into sentences now.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

41. “16. I haven’t seen you run that fast since Twinkies went on sale.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

42. “Yo momma’s so old she used to hitch a ride to work with Fred Flintstone.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

43. “All that you are you owe to your parents. Why don’t you send them.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

44. “She’s so fat that when she walked in front of the television, the kids missed three commercials.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

45. “Yo momma’s so dirty homeless people throw change at her when she sits on a park bench. Yo momma’s so dirty, when she told your daddy to take out the trash, he put her out on the curb. Yo momma’s so dirty, when I called her on the.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

46. “Did the mental hospital test too many drugs on you today?”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

47. “Yo momma’s so ugly, when she looked in the mirror her reflection screamed in horror.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

48. “I reprimanded my brother for mimicking you. I told him not to act like a fool.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

49. “Yo momma’s so short she has to use a ladder to get up on the curb.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY

50. “Yo momma’s so dirty homeless people throw change at her when she sits on a park bench. Yo.”

— THE CLOWN FACTORY