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Top 10 Thomas Gordon Quotes (2025 Update)

Thomas Gordon Quote: “Parents are blamed but not trained.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “Active Listening provides parents with a way of moving in and offering to help the child define the problem for herself, and starting up the process of problem-solving within the child.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “Parents can raise children who are responsible, self-disciplined, and cooperative without relying on the weapon of fear; they can learn how to influence children to behave out of genuine consideration for the needs of parents rather than out of fear of punishment or withdrawal of privileges.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “Power suppresses creativity and productivity; it is hazardous to the health and well-being of both the controller and the controllee. Power generates the forces that will inevitably destroy or replace it; power bites its own tail; it stifles creative dissent; it extinguishes trust, fellowship, intimacy, and love; power entraps the controller as it enslaves the controllee.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “Much of the rebellion of today’s adolescents can be attributed to parents and other adults who put pressure on them to modify behavior that the kids feel is their own business. Children do not rebel against adults – they rebel against adults’ attempts to take away their freedom.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “I often tell parents, “Don’t want your child to become something in particular; just want him to become.” With such an attitude parents will inevitably find themselves feeling more and more accepting of each child and experiencing joy and excitement watching each become.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “We know that when people learn to communicate effectively with each other, their lives and their relationships can be truly transformed. This book gives people both a way of expressing their needs congruently and non-blamefully and a way of listening so others feel not just heard, but understood.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “Parents report that Active Listening when a child is hurt and cries vigorously frequently brings about a dramatic and instantaneous cessation of the crying, once the child is certain her parent knows and understands how badly she feels or how much she is afraid. For the child, getting this understanding of her feelings is what she needs most.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “Parents can modify themselves, and reduce the number of behaviors that are unacceptable to them, by coming to see that their children are not their children, not extensions of themselves, but separate, unique. A child has the right to become what he is capable of becoming, no matter how different from the parent or the parent’s blueprint for the child. This is his inalienable right.”
Thomas Gordon Quote: “You have created a life, now let the child have it. Let him decide what he wants to do with the life you gave him.”
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