Top 60 Trey Parker Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “I can feel myself dying inside.”

— Trey Parker

2. “I think people that have a brother or sister don’t realize how lucky they are. Sure, they fight a lot, but to know that there’s always somebody there, somebody that’s family.”

— Trey Parker

3. “Saying goodbye doesn’t mean anything. It’s the time we spent together that matters, not how we left it.”

— Trey Parker

4. “I was always a very happy, optimistic person.”

— Trey Parker

5. “Careful?! Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a coat hanger while I was still in womb?”

— Trey Parker

6. “Sometimes what’s right isn’t as important as what’s profitable.”

— Trey Parker

7. “People have a lot of different beliefs, and at the end of the day, we all have deeply held beliefs that probably don’t make sense to anyone else.”

— Trey Parker

8. “Living is having ups and downs and sharing them with friends.”

— Trey Parker

9. “The story of Jesus makes no sense to me. God sent his only son. Why could God only have one son and why would he have to die? It’s just bad writing, really. And it’s really terrible in about the second act.”

— Trey Parker

10. “We find just as many things to rip on the left as we do on the right. People on the far-left and the far-right are the same exact person to us.”

— Trey Parker

11. “Jerry Bruckheimer creates comedy, he just doesn’t realize because he’s a turd.”

— Trey Parker

12. “If we have a great idea, we’ll go, ‘Oh, this could be a cool movie.’ Or really for us, it’s more like, ‘Oh, this is a really bad idea. Let’s do this. This seems really stupid.’”

— Trey Parker

13. “You know that everyone thinks that in order to do South Park we must be wild, crazy, rock and roll stars. But the truth is we’re just wholesome middle-American guys. We enjoy soda pop, baseball and beating up old people just as much as anybody.”

— Trey Parker

14. “My favorite musical? I don’t. It changes all the time. I’m just a diehard, I’m totally old school, like I’ll sit and watch, if they are re-doing Oklahoma in New York, I will be the first one there.”

— Trey Parker

15. “Any job is a job. If you have to be doing something, then you’re probably not enjoying it.”

— Trey Parker

16. “I find Mormons adorable.”

— Trey Parker

17. “Bargaining makes you come up with the best ideas.”

— Trey Parker

18. “I bought a house for my mom, I bought a house for my dad, I bought a house for my sister.”

— Trey Parker

19. “You don’t need missionaries in Colorado; you got Colorado.”

— Trey Parker

20. “I just realized that there are going to be a lot of painful times in life, so I better learn to deal with them in the right way.”

— Trey Parker

21. “My first serious girlfriend, when I was 16, was Mormon. I went to her house for ‘family home evening,’ and I was like, ‘Why aren’t you people ignoring each other and watching television?’”

— Trey Parker

22. “When I was in sixth grade there was a talent show, and I wrote my first sketch, ‘The Dentist.’ I played the dentist, and I had my friend play a patient. It was sort of what can go wrong at the dentist, and I just remember I had lots of fake blood and everything.”

— Trey Parker

23. “I’ve learned that all a person has in life is family and friends. If you lose those, you have nothing, so friends are to be treasured more than anything else in the world.”

— Trey Parker

24. “The basis of all reasoning is the mind’s awareness of itself. What we think, the external objects we perceive, are all like actors that come on and off stage. But our consciousness, the stage itself, is always present to us.”

— Trey Parker

25. “It’s an Afghanistan goat, so it can’t stay here, or else it’ll choke on the sweet air of freedom.”

— Trey Parker

26. “I got into this little habit of architecture and building. I designed a house in Colorado and one in Hawaii. The idea is supposed to be build and sell – but then I can never bring myself to sell them.”

— Trey Parker

27. “It’s this simple law, which every writer knows, of taking two opposites and putting them in a room together. I love anything with Cartman and Butters at the same time, it’s great.”

— Trey Parker

28. “It’s been a fascinating thing because we didn’t really know how to write when we started South Park at all. It’s been like, we’ve just sort of grown up a bit and it’s amazing to just see how, if you take Butters and Cartman and put them in any scene, it works.”

— Trey Parker

29. “I would let my kids watch this stuff way before I’d let them watch something like ‘Full House’ that I think would make them stupid.”

— Trey Parker

30. “I see Santa Claus and Joseph Smith and Luke Skywalker as the same person.”

— Trey Parker

31. “I think that parents only get so offended by television because they rely on it as a babysitter and the sole educator of their kids.”

— Trey Parker

32. “Hollywood views regular people as children, and they think they’re the smart ones who need to tell the idiots out there how to be.”

— Trey Parker

33. “There is nothing we can’t do. So it’s just the fact that we’re doing topics like that that other people, especially network TV, won’t touch, that we’re satirists.”

— Trey Parker

34. “I hate puppets so much.”

— Trey Parker

35. “I don’t want to say never, but I hope I don’t become that ‘take me seriously now’ guy.”

— Trey Parker

36. “No, writing musicals is the hardest thing in the world. And it was really funny, because I remember when the South Park movie came out, there were some critics that said, ‘Well it’s obvious that in order to get it to be 90 minutes they filled some time with music.’”

— Trey Parker

37. “In terms of the creative side of it, it’s really been a thing where you come up with the funny stuff is usually at a bar or out talking to people or whatever.”

— Trey Parker

38. “I find Mormons adorable. I love Disneyland and old musicals, and, to me, Mormonism fits right in with all of that.”

— Trey Parker

39. “All the religions are super funny to me.”

— Trey Parker

40. “Well I looked in my moms closet and saw what I was getting for Christmas, an ultravibe pleasure 2000.”

— Trey Parker

41. “My fear is that, as soon as I get married and have kids that I’ll kind of do what a lot of people do and suddenly start making, ‘Now I’m gonna make films for kids.’ I really hope I don’t do that.”

— Trey Parker

42. “Even from the very beginning, I didn’t put any money in the stock market.”

— Trey Parker

43. “Even if you’re not Christian, just from being in our culture you know Jesus and resurrection and redemption.”

— Trey Parker

44. “Me and Matt love to argue, but in general our sense of humor is pretty much alike.”

— Trey Parker

45. “What we’re always looking for is weird social issues and weird connections to make. Luckily for them, there’s no shortage of material.”

— Trey Parker

46. “So we’re considering doing a new Christmas album, because there’s been Christmas episodes since then, and maybe finally do the version of ‘The Most Offensive Song Ever’ with lyrics intact.”

— Trey Parker

47. “I spend shockingly little time thinking about real-world stuff.”

— Trey Parker

48. “There’s a lot of people who, a cigarette is about the only vacation they have.”

— Trey Parker

49. “Sean Penn’s really the only one stupid enough to put anything down on paper.”

— Trey Parker

50. “I have no desire to ever talk to Sean Penn.”

— Trey Parker