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Top 60 Allie Brosh Quotes (2026 Update)
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Allie Brosh Quote: “Anger is not a graceful emotion. I’ve never gotten mad and been like, “I’m glad I behaved like that!” I feel weird about it every time.”

51. “Anger is not a graceful emotion. I’ve never gotten mad and been like, “I’m glad I behaved like that!” I feel weird about it every time.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “Having to be personally responsible for maintaining justice in the world is distressing. It makes it seem like maybe there’s something wrong at the Universal Fairness and Balance Department. Like maybe the higher-ups have lost control and they need help.”

52. “Having to be personally responsible for maintaining justice in the world is distressing. It makes it seem like maybe there’s something wrong at the Universal Fairness and Balance Department. Like maybe the higher-ups have lost control and they need help.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “And that’s the most frustrating thing about depression. It isn’t always something you can fight back against with hope. It isn’t even something – it’s nothing. And you can’t combat nothing.”

53. “And that’s the most frustrating thing about depression. It isn’t always something you can fight back against with hope. It isn’t even something – it’s nothing. And you can’t combat nothing.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “When you have to spend every social interacting manipulating your face into shapes that are only approximately the right ones, alienating people is inevitable.”

54. “When you have to spend every social interacting manipulating your face into shapes that are only approximately the right ones, alienating people is inevitable.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “Procrastination has become a it’s own solution – a tool I can use to push myself so close to disaster that I become terrified and flee towards success.”

55. “Procrastination has become a it’s own solution – a tool I can use to push myself so close to disaster that I become terrified and flee towards success.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “But, as long as you aren’t dead, you need something to do. And surviving is something to do.”

56. “But, as long as you aren’t dead, you need something to do. And surviving is something to do.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “But when you’re concerned that the miserable, boring wasteland in front of you might stretch all the way into forever, not knowing feels strangely hope-like.”

57. “But when you’re concerned that the miserable, boring wasteland in front of you might stretch all the way into forever, not knowing feels strangely hope-like.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “Reality should follow through on what I think it is going to do.”

58. “Reality should follow through on what I think it is going to do.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “One of the most terrifying things that has ever happened to me was watching myself over and over again – thirty-five days in a row – not to return a movie I had rented. Every day, I saw it sitting there on the arm of my couch. And every day, I thought, “I should really do something about that... ” and then I just didn’t.”

59. “One of the most terrifying things that has ever happened to me was watching myself over and over again – thirty-five days in a row – not to return a movie I had rented. Every day, I saw it sitting there on the arm of my couch. And every day, I thought, “I should really do something about that... ” and then I just didn’t.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “I had always viewed feelings as a weakness – annoying obstacles on my quest for total power over myself.”

60. “I had always viewed feelings as a weakness – annoying obstacles on my quest for total power over myself.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “I followed myself around like a bully, narrating my thoughts and actions with a constant stream of abuse.”

61. “I followed myself around like a bully, narrating my thoughts and actions with a constant stream of abuse.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “For a little while, I actually feel grown-up and responsible. I strut around with my head held high, looking the other responsible people in the eye with that knowing glance that says, I understand. I’m responsible now too. Just look at my groceries.”

62. “For a little while, I actually feel grown-up and responsible. I strut around with my head held high, looking the other responsible people in the eye with that knowing glance that says, I understand. I’m responsible now too. Just look at my groceries.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “When I encounter someone I haven’t seen in a while, I have never once thought, I should jump at them and poke their face with my fingers and keep doing that until someone locks me in the bathroom. Because that’s insane. What would you think if I did that to your dog friends?”

63. “When I encounter someone I haven’t seen in a while, I have never once thought, I should jump at them and poke their face with my fingers and keep doing that until someone locks me in the bathroom. Because that’s insane. What would you think if I did that to your dog friends?”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “This is a reasonable point. And when you’re in full-on rage-ejection mode, there is nothing more infuriating than a reasonable point.”

64. “This is a reasonable point. And when you’re in full-on rage-ejection mode, there is nothing more infuriating than a reasonable point.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “Carl believes that he is better than everybody, when really, he is slightly worse than average.”

65. “Carl believes that he is better than everybody, when really, he is slightly worse than average.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “It wants to focus on being a good person, not just a barely not horrible one.”

66. “It wants to focus on being a good person, not just a barely not horrible one.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “I suspect that, left to my own devices, I would completely lose control of my life.”

67. “I suspect that, left to my own devices, I would completely lose control of my life.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “To me, the future doesn’t seem real. It’s just this magical place where I can put my responsibilities so that I don’t have to be scared while hurtling toward failure at eight hundred miles per hour.”

68. “To me, the future doesn’t seem real. It’s just this magical place where I can put my responsibilities so that I don’t have to be scared while hurtling toward failure at eight hundred miles per hour.”

— Allie Brosh

Allie Brosh Quote: “We’re going to play a different game now. It’s called “who can yell ‘help’ the loudest and the most.”

69. “We’re going to play a different game now. It’s called “who can yell ‘help’ the loudest and the most.”

— Allie Brosh

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