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Top 500 David Mitchell Quotes (2026 Update)
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David Mitchell Quote: “The impossible is negotiable. What is possible is malleable.”

301. “The impossible is negotiable. What is possible is malleable.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “De wereld is al wankel genoeg.”

302. “De wereld is al wankel genoeg.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Attaining immortality is easier than controlling its terms and conditions.”

303. “Attaining immortality is easier than controlling its terms and conditions.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “It’s a classy Victorian pub with brass fittings, upholstered chair backs, and NO SPITTING signs.”

304. “It’s a classy Victorian pub with brass fittings, upholstered chair backs, and NO SPITTING signs.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “However, corpocracy was emerging and social strata was demarked, based on dollars and, curiously, the quantity of melanin in one’s skin.”

305. “However, corpocracy was emerging and social strata was demarked, based on dollars and, curiously, the quantity of melanin in one’s skin.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “There’s something fishy about Google’s motto, “Don’t Be Evil.” I’m not saying it’s controversial but it makes you think, “Why bring that up? Why have you suddenly put the subject of being evil on the agenda?” It’s suspicious in the same way as Ukip constantly pointing out how racist they’re not –.”

306. “There’s something fishy about Google’s motto, “Don’t Be Evil.” I’m not saying it’s controversial but it makes you think, “Why bring that up? Why have you suddenly put the subject of being evil on the agenda?” It’s suspicious in the same way as Ukip constantly pointing out how racist they’re not –.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Truth has this habit of changing after the fact, don’t you find?”

307. “Truth has this habit of changing after the fact, don’t you find?”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “All boundaries are conventions.”

308. “All boundaries are conventions.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “I managed to smile, thinking how Modesty is Vanity’s craftier stepbrother.”

309. “I managed to smile, thinking how Modesty is Vanity’s craftier stepbrother.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Listening’s reading if you close your eyes. Music’s a wood you walk through.”

310. “Listening’s reading if you close your eyes. Music’s a wood you walk through.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “In March of 1915, all three of Lord and Lady Chetwynd-Pitt’s sons’d been gassed, blown up or machine-gunned in the very same week at the battle of Neuve-Chapelle. All three. Imagine that: On Monday, you’ve got three sons, by Friday you’ve got none. Lady Albertina had just, y’know, caved in. Physically, mentally, spiritually, brutally.”

311. “In March of 1915, all three of Lord and Lady Chetwynd-Pitt’s sons’d been gassed, blown up or machine-gunned in the very same week at the battle of Neuve-Chapelle. All three. Imagine that: On Monday, you’ve got three sons, by Friday you’ve got none. Lady Albertina had just, y’know, caved in. Physically, mentally, spiritually, brutally.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “London is a language. I guess all places are.”

312. “London is a language. I guess all places are.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “I was tired of flying. Tired of that life, of the screams, of the faces, of the fame. So I quit. Fame molds itself onto your face. Then it molds your face.”

313. “I was tired of flying. Tired of that life, of the screams, of the faces, of the fame. So I quit. Fame molds itself onto your face. Then it molds your face.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Despair is as attractive as cold sores.”

314. “Despair is as attractive as cold sores.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Because her laughter spurts through a blow-hole in the top of her head and sprays all over the morning. Because a man like me has no business with this substance ‘beauty’, yet here she is, in these soundproofed chambers of my heart.”

315. “Because her laughter spurts through a blow-hole in the top of her head and sprays all over the morning. Because a man like me has no business with this substance ‘beauty’, yet here she is, in these soundproofed chambers of my heart.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Wrong turns teach us the right way.”

316. “Wrong turns teach us the right way.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Marmite!’ Never has a product more successfully concealed the truth of its mediocrity merely by conceding the fact that some people find it disgusting.”

317. “Marmite!’ Never has a product more successfully concealed the truth of its mediocrity merely by conceding the fact that some people find it disgusting.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Laboring types surrounded me with bad teeth, parrot voices, and unfounded optimism.”

318. “Laboring types surrounded me with bad teeth, parrot voices, and unfounded optimism.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “A stunt kite writes on the blue with its pink tail.”

319. “A stunt kite writes on the blue with its pink tail.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Eavesdropping’s sort of thrilling ’cause you learn what people really think, but eavesdropping makes you miserable for exactly the same reason.”

320. “Eavesdropping’s sort of thrilling ’cause you learn what people really think, but eavesdropping makes you miserable for exactly the same reason.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Sit down a beat or two. Hold out your hands. Look.”

321. “Sit down a beat or two. Hold out your hands. Look.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Time is the speed at which the past decays.”

322. “Time is the speed at which the past decays.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Every nowhere is a somewhere.”

323. “Every nowhere is a somewhere.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Dr. Egret gives me the creeps. Never met a quack whom I didn’t half-suspect of plotting to do me in as expensively as he could contrive.”

324. “Dr. Egret gives me the creeps. Never met a quack whom I didn’t half-suspect of plotting to do me in as expensively as he could contrive.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “People talk about the Endarkenment like our ancestors talked about the Black Death, as if it’s an act of God. But we summoned it, with every tank of oil we burned our way through. My generation were diners stuffing ourselves senseless at the Restaurant of the Earth’s Riches knowing – while denying – that we’d be doing a runner and leaving our grandchildren a tab that can never be paid.”

325. “People talk about the Endarkenment like our ancestors talked about the Black Death, as if it’s an act of God. But we summoned it, with every tank of oil we burned our way through. My generation were diners stuffing ourselves senseless at the Restaurant of the Earth’s Riches knowing – while denying – that we’d be doing a runner and leaving our grandchildren a tab that can never be paid.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “It’s vital to our understanding of a complex world, and to our intellectual dexterity, to be able to hold two different concepts in our heads at once without assuming that they’re mutually exclusive.”

326. “It’s vital to our understanding of a complex world, and to our intellectual dexterity, to be able to hold two different concepts in our heads at once without assuming that they’re mutually exclusive.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Do you think Britain is a great country? I do, basically. It’s embarrassing to admit it. And it feels un-British to admit it, except for the fact that it’s embarrassing, which is a very British sensation. Embarrassment is one of our strongest emotions.”

327. “Do you think Britain is a great country? I do, basically. It’s embarrassing to admit it. And it feels un-British to admit it, except for the fact that it’s embarrassing, which is a very British sensation. Embarrassment is one of our strongest emotions.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Where there’s bluster, thinks Luisa, there’s duplicity.”

328. “Where there’s bluster, thinks Luisa, there’s duplicity.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Leave Ueno Station through the park entrance, go past the concert hall and museums, skirt around the fountain, and you come to a sort of tree garden. Homeless people live here, in tents made of sky-blue plastic sheeting and wooden poles. The best tents even have doors.”

329. “Leave Ueno Station through the park entrance, go past the concert hall and museums, skirt around the fountain, and you come to a sort of tree garden. Homeless people live here, in tents made of sky-blue plastic sheeting and wooden poles. The best tents even have doors.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “A random sequence of seemingly unrelated events.”

330. “A random sequence of seemingly unrelated events.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “All the woe of the words “I am” seemed dissolved there, painlessly, peacefully. Hae-Joo announced, “The ocean.”

331. “All the woe of the words “I am” seemed dissolved there, painlessly, peacefully. Hae-Joo announced, “The ocean.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “A book can’t be a half-fantasy any more than a woman can be half pregnant.”

332. “A book can’t be a half-fantasy any more than a woman can be half pregnant.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Yet the way men live is so far removed from the way they ought to live that anyone who abandons what ‘is’ for what ‘should be’ pursues his downfall rather than his preservation;.”

333. “Yet the way men live is so far removed from the way they ought to live that anyone who abandons what ‘is’ for what ‘should be’ pursues his downfall rather than his preservation;.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “One cannot cross the same river twice.”

334. “One cannot cross the same river twice.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Even as I write, my former premises are being turned into a Hard Rock Cafe for homesick Americans.”

335. “Even as I write, my former premises are being turned into a Hard Rock Cafe for homesick Americans.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “A history program on BBC2 that afternoon showed old footage shot in Ypres in 1919. That hellish mockery of a once fair town was my own soul.”

336. “A history program on BBC2 that afternoon showed old footage shot in Ypres in 1919. That hellish mockery of a once fair town was my own soul.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Adverbs are cholesterol in the veins of prose.”

337. “Adverbs are cholesterol in the veins of prose.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “All defectors have a complex relationship with truth.”

338. “All defectors have a complex relationship with truth.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “What man ain’t the honestest cove in his own eyes?” Grote’s round face is a bronze moon in the dark. “’Tain’t good intentions what paves the road to hell: it’s self-justifyin’s.”

339. “What man ain’t the honestest cove in his own eyes?” Grote’s round face is a bronze moon in the dark. “’Tain’t good intentions what paves the road to hell: it’s self-justifyin’s.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Crazy people are hard work.”

340. “Crazy people are hard work.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “My spine still works. That’s always useful.”

341. “My spine still works. That’s always useful.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Did you not detect the hairline cracks in the plot? Such.”

342. “Did you not detect the hairline cracks in the plot? Such.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “There is no God but the one we dream up.”

343. “There is no God but the one we dream up.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “I would agree with your statement that many of my protagonists are outsiders. I wonder if we all are, and even people who don’t think they are, and they’re just better at masking it. When we shut our bedroom door at night, however well-integrated we think we are with the rest of society, maybe there’s something illusory about that...”

344. “I would agree with your statement that many of my protagonists are outsiders. I wonder if we all are, and even people who don’t think they are, and they’re just better at masking it. When we shut our bedroom door at night, however well-integrated we think we are with the rest of society, maybe there’s something illusory about that...”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Life goes much more smoothly when everyone’s saying sorry. It’s the second most important social lubricant and, unlike the first, it doesn’t damage your liver.”

345. “Life goes much more smoothly when everyone’s saying sorry. It’s the second most important social lubricant and, unlike the first, it doesn’t damage your liver.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “And grade every simile and metaphor from one star to five, and remove any threes or below. It hurts when you operate, but afterwards you feel much better.”

346. “And grade every simile and metaphor from one star to five, and remove any threes or below. It hurts when you operate, but afterwards you feel much better.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “You know, having the roof over one’s head dependent upon the good offices of an employer is a loathsome way to live. Christ only knows how the serving classes stand it.”

347. “You know, having the roof over one’s head dependent upon the good offices of an employer is a loathsome way to live. Christ only knows how the serving classes stand it.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Echoes of Scriabin’s White Mass, Stravinsky’s lost footprints, chromatics of the more lunar Debussy, but truth is I don’t know where it came from.”

348. “Echoes of Scriabin’s White Mass, Stravinsky’s lost footprints, chromatics of the more lunar Debussy, but truth is I don’t know where it came from.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Love is the anesthetic applied by Nature to extract babies.”

349. “Love is the anesthetic applied by Nature to extract babies.”

— David Mitchell

David Mitchell Quote: “Young mothers are the most vicious tribe in the world if you don’t fit in.”

350. “Young mothers are the most vicious tribe in the world if you don’t fit in.”

— David Mitchell

Funny Quotes

Strong Quotes

Journey Quotes

Firsts Quotes

Legacy Quotes

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Funny Quotes

FUNNY BUSINESS

Strong Quotes

Journey Quotes

Firsts Quotes

Legacy Quotes

Kindness Quotes

Kindness Quotes

KINDNESS

Reading Quotes

READING

Travel Quotes

TRAVEL

Past Quotes

PAST

Quotes About Stories

Quotes About Stories

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Quotes About Ocean

Quotes About Ocean

OCEAN

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