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Top 150 David Wong Quotes (2025 Update)
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David Wong Quote: “That black pool of shame bubbled up in my head again. Then, a spark came along and set it alight. The choice between feeling the toxic ooze of self loathing and the fire of mindless rage is no choice at all.”

101. “That black pool of shame bubbled up in my head again. Then, a spark came along and set it alight. The choice between feeling the toxic ooze of self loathing and the fire of mindless rage is no choice at all.”

David Wong Quote: “So why do we call her crazy for piling her trailer full of more cats than she could take care of but applaud when somebody accumulates more money than they can spend? They’re both hoarders.”

102. “So why do we call her crazy for piling her trailer full of more cats than she could take care of but applaud when somebody accumulates more money than they can spend? They’re both hoarders.”

David Wong Quote: “I’ve developed a pretty good survival system involving nothing more than mental alertness exercises, positive thinking and amphetamines.”

103. “I’ve developed a pretty good survival system involving nothing more than mental alertness exercises, positive thinking and amphetamines.”

David Wong Quote: “Let me give you a tip: if you’re ever the victim of a terrible crime – like, say, your kid goes missing – and you see the cops consulting with a couple of white trash–looking dipshits in their late twenties, it’s time to worry. It’s not because John and I are incompetent at what we do – and I assure you, we are – but because you need to start asking yourself a very hard question. Not “Will I get my child back?” but “Do I want to get my child back?”

104. “Let me give you a tip: if you’re ever the victim of a terrible crime – like, say, your kid goes missing – and you see the cops consulting with a couple of white trash–looking dipshits in their late twenties, it’s time to worry. It’s not because John and I are incompetent at what we do – and I assure you, we are – but because you need to start asking yourself a very hard question. Not “Will I get my child back?” but “Do I want to get my child back?”

David Wong Quote: “Okay, there is no possible combination of English words that would form a dumber plan than that.”

105. “Okay, there is no possible combination of English words that would form a dumber plan than that.”

David Wong Quote: “In the real world, bullets that miss their targets keep traveling until they hit something. They fly through windows, and into the bodies of bystanders. And even successfully killing a bad guy creates blowback, sets off a whole chain of consequences that are impossible to predict. Guns always represent a failure of negotiation.”

106. “In the real world, bullets that miss their targets keep traveling until they hit something. They fly through windows, and into the bodies of bystanders. And even successfully killing a bad guy creates blowback, sets off a whole chain of consequences that are impossible to predict. Guns always represent a failure of negotiation.”

David Wong Quote: “We were not restrained in our chairs, but there were so many guns on us that if I scratched my nose, the shooting aftermath would look like somebody had just spilled a huge lasagna here.”

107. “We were not restrained in our chairs, but there were so many guns on us that if I scratched my nose, the shooting aftermath would look like somebody had just spilled a huge lasagna here.”

David Wong Quote: “Society is nothing more than people cooperating with other people they’d much rather murder.”

108. “Society is nothing more than people cooperating with other people they’d much rather murder.”

David Wong Quote: “John jolted awake to find himself staring down a shotgun wielded by his greatest enemy: himself.”

109. “John jolted awake to find himself staring down a shotgun wielded by his greatest enemy: himself.”

David Wong Quote: “A teenager stood there. Right in the middle of my living room, a space that had been proudly teenager-free for years.”

110. “A teenager stood there. Right in the middle of my living room, a space that had been proudly teenager-free for years.”

David Wong Quote: “It had the tangled floor plan common to all hospitals, seemingly designed by someone who believed in the healing power of watching confused visitors aimlessly wander around hallways.”

111. “It had the tangled floor plan common to all hospitals, seemingly designed by someone who believed in the healing power of watching confused visitors aimlessly wander around hallways.”

David Wong Quote: “War is about remaking the world to suit the whims of some powerful group over the whims of some other powerful group. The dead are just the sparks that fly from the metal as they grind it down.”

112. “War is about remaking the world to suit the whims of some powerful group over the whims of some other powerful group. The dead are just the sparks that fly from the metal as they grind it down.”

David Wong Quote: “John snatched the rebound, spun, jumped, slammed. He pumped his fist in victory. “Ring it up! Two hundred seventy-four to one thirty-seven!” In John’s game, each shot is worth one hundred and thirty-seven points.”

113. “John snatched the rebound, spun, jumped, slammed. He pumped his fist in victory. “Ring it up! Two hundred seventy-four to one thirty-seven!” In John’s game, each shot is worth one hundred and thirty-seven points.”

David Wong Quote: “I closed my eyes and let out a breath that smelled like I’d eaten an entire wet dog and washed it down with sweat wrung from a hobo’s undershirt.”

114. “I closed my eyes and let out a breath that smelled like I’d eaten an entire wet dog and washed it down with sweat wrung from a hobo’s undershirt.”

David Wong Quote: “The future is what it is,” said Largeman. “Your people have been poisoned with the myths of lone men turning the tide, improbable tales of heroes outrunning explosions with their feet. Such tales are forbidden here. Events are laid forth and they cannot be turned. There are no heroes, Mr. Wong.”

115. “The future is what it is,” said Largeman. “Your people have been poisoned with the myths of lone men turning the tide, improbable tales of heroes outrunning explosions with their feet. Such tales are forbidden here. Events are laid forth and they cannot be turned. There are no heroes, Mr. Wong.”

David Wong Quote: “We simplify tens of millions of individuals down into simplistic stereotypes, so that they hold the space of only one individual in our limited available memory slots. And here is the key – those who lie outside the circle are not human. We lack the capacity to recognize them as such.”

116. “We simplify tens of millions of individuals down into simplistic stereotypes, so that they hold the space of only one individual in our limited available memory slots. And here is the key – those who lie outside the circle are not human. We lack the capacity to recognize them as such.”

David Wong Quote: “There,” said the large man. “The kittens will make your sad go away.”

117. “There,” said the large man. “The kittens will make your sad go away.”

David Wong Quote: “Falconer was wearing his street clothes – jeans, a black turtleneck and an empty shoulder holster under his armpit. Cowboy boots. Little bit of beard stubble. John wondered if the guy would walk from one end of the street to the other without winding up covered in bitches.”

118. “Falconer was wearing his street clothes – jeans, a black turtleneck and an empty shoulder holster under his armpit. Cowboy boots. Little bit of beard stubble. John wondered if the guy would walk from one end of the street to the other without winding up covered in bitches.”

David Wong Quote: “But here’s the thing – lying would have become useless thousands of years ago if countering it was as simple as dismissing the liars completely. The really good liars were like chemists, brewing formulas that were mostly truth, the toxins undetectable in the mixture.”

119. “But here’s the thing – lying would have become useless thousands of years ago if countering it was as simple as dismissing the liars completely. The really good liars were like chemists, brewing formulas that were mostly truth, the toxins undetectable in the mixture.”

David Wong Quote: “Close to it was an aquarium tank filled with a thick, yellowish substance that could have been slug slime and at the bottom was a wrinkled grayish mass that could have been a human brain or possibly a meat-loaf.”

120. “Close to it was an aquarium tank filled with a thick, yellowish substance that could have been slug slime and at the bottom was a wrinkled grayish mass that could have been a human brain or possibly a meat-loaf.”

David Wong Quote: “My hair looked like I had combed it with an angry cat.”

121. “My hair looked like I had combed it with an angry cat.”

David Wong Quote: “The bathroom was clean. Well, not clean, but there were no corpses in there.”

122. “The bathroom was clean. Well, not clean, but there were no corpses in there.”

David Wong Quote: “But in those first hours after you take it, your brain is tuned in like nothing you can imagine. Eyes like the Hubble telescope, sensing light that’s not even on the spectrum. You might be able to read minds, make time stop, cook pasta that’s exactly right every time.”

123. “But in those first hours after you take it, your brain is tuned in like nothing you can imagine. Eyes like the Hubble telescope, sensing light that’s not even on the spectrum. You might be able to read minds, make time stop, cook pasta that’s exactly right every time.”

David Wong Quote: “I squinted drunkenly into the rearview mirror and tried in vain to find the headlights of the black truck that was chasing us, but I actually wasn’t sure if its drivers needed headlights to see or if they even had eyes. I also wasn’t sure it was a truck, or if it was black, or if we were being pursued at all. It was definitely raining, though.”

124. “I squinted drunkenly into the rearview mirror and tried in vain to find the headlights of the black truck that was chasing us, but I actually wasn’t sure if its drivers needed headlights to see or if they even had eyes. I also wasn’t sure it was a truck, or if it was black, or if we were being pursued at all. It was definitely raining, though.”

David Wong Quote: “I wrapped up the remaining half burrito and tossed it into the trash can. Molly watched this act of wastefulness with an expression like she had just seen her entire family die in a fire.”

125. “I wrapped up the remaining half burrito and tossed it into the trash can. Molly watched this act of wastefulness with an expression like she had just seen her entire family die in a fire.”

David Wong Quote: “We don’t feel like that’s a good faith offer, because it seems more like you’re just trying to save money on cockroaches.”

126. “We don’t feel like that’s a good faith offer, because it seems more like you’re just trying to save money on cockroaches.”

David Wong Quote: “My point is, I have a job, just like you. I get a paycheck, I get memos. Just like you, I have superiors, and they have superiors who I am not allowed to speak to. Orders filter down from on high, arriving at my level stripped entirely of all context or rationale or justification. Orders do not come with an illustration of how they serve the overall goals of the organization. Same as any other job.”

127. “My point is, I have a job, just like you. I get a paycheck, I get memos. Just like you, I have superiors, and they have superiors who I am not allowed to speak to. Orders filter down from on high, arriving at my level stripped entirely of all context or rationale or justification. Orders do not come with an illustration of how they serve the overall goals of the organization. Same as any other job.”

David Wong Quote: “The man who greeted her on the sidewalk was named Hank Kowalski. He was bald and had the eyes of a man whose favorite joke is just a shrieking child falling down a flight of stairs.”

128. “The man who greeted her on the sidewalk was named Hank Kowalski. He was bald and had the eyes of a man whose favorite joke is just a shrieking child falling down a flight of stairs.”

David Wong Quote: “John looked at him and yelled, “What are you waiting for? Shoot him in the mouth!” The word “mouth” could not be heard over the gunshots.”

129. “John looked at him and yelled, “What are you waiting for? Shoot him in the mouth!” The word “mouth” could not be heard over the gunshots.”

David Wong Quote: “Ravenous appetites and strange desires lurking just below, like I was bobbing on an inner tube in the middle of the ocean while below me swarmed the swift shadows of a vast school of Cthulhus.”

130. “Ravenous appetites and strange desires lurking just below, like I was bobbing on an inner tube in the middle of the ocean while below me swarmed the swift shadows of a vast school of Cthulhus.”

David Wong Quote: “John, possessing a genetic defect that makes him walk toward danger, strode down toward where it looked like some cops were trying to set up a perimeter around the chaos. Somewhere, Charles Darwin nodded and smiled a knowing smile.”

131. “John, possessing a genetic defect that makes him walk toward danger, strode down toward where it looked like some cops were trying to set up a perimeter around the chaos. Somewhere, Charles Darwin nodded and smiled a knowing smile.”

David Wong Quote: “Armando appeared in the door of the bathroom with his gun drawn, because in his world even a vomiting woman was apparently a problem that could be cured with a well-placed bullet.”

132. “Armando appeared in the door of the bathroom with his gun drawn, because in his world even a vomiting woman was apparently a problem that could be cured with a well-placed bullet.”

David Wong Quote: “You’re not a child,” said Will, gently. “I won’t treat you like one. You’re asking me if this was your fault because you want to know what emotion you’re supposed to be feeling right now. Are you supposed to be beating yourself up? Well, that’s the wrong question. The world doesn’t care about your emotions.” “So what question should I be asking?” “Whether or not you would do it differently next time. Everything that happens matters only in terms of what you can learn from it going forward.”

133. “You’re not a child,” said Will, gently. “I won’t treat you like one. You’re asking me if this was your fault because you want to know what emotion you’re supposed to be feeling right now. Are you supposed to be beating yourself up? Well, that’s the wrong question. The world doesn’t care about your emotions.” “So what question should I be asking?” “Whether or not you would do it differently next time. Everything that happens matters only in terms of what you can learn from it going forward.”

David Wong Quote: “People don’t want solutions. They want novelty.”

134. “People don’t want solutions. They want novelty.”

David Wong Quote: “I have a friend, Dana, who was in the grocery store one day, and her arm, like, bursts into flame. Just like that. Just her arm. And she’s screaming and waving her arm around and around, flames shooting everywhere. Finally the cops showed up and arrested her.” “Arrested her? Why did – ” “Possession of an unlicensed firearm.” A.”

135. “I have a friend, Dana, who was in the grocery store one day, and her arm, like, bursts into flame. Just like that. Just her arm. And she’s screaming and waving her arm around and around, flames shooting everywhere. Finally the cops showed up and arrested her.” “Arrested her? Why did – ” “Possession of an unlicensed firearm.” A.”

David Wong Quote: “But a supercomputer can do over a trillion mathematical equations in one second. To that machine, one second is a lifetime, an eternity. Speed up how much thinking you can do in two seconds and two seconds becomes two minutes, or two hours or two trillion years.”

136. “But a supercomputer can do over a trillion mathematical equations in one second. To that machine, one second is a lifetime, an eternity. Speed up how much thinking you can do in two seconds and two seconds becomes two minutes, or two hours or two trillion years.”

David Wong Quote: “John said, “When they get here, let me do all the talking.” I said, “Amy, when they get here, I want you to do all of the talking. I’ll be busy restraining John.”

137. “John said, “When they get here, let me do all the talking.” I said, “Amy, when they get here, I want you to do all of the talking. I’ll be busy restraining John.”

David Wong Quote: “There is no ‘chosen one,’ there is no destiny, nobody wakes up one day and finds out they’re amazing at something. There’s just slamming your head into the wall, refusing to take no for an answer. Being relentless, until either the wall or your head breaks. You want to be a hero? You don’t have to make some grand decision. There’s no inspirational music, there’s no montage. You just don’t quit.”

138. “There is no ‘chosen one,’ there is no destiny, nobody wakes up one day and finds out they’re amazing at something. There’s just slamming your head into the wall, refusing to take no for an answer. Being relentless, until either the wall or your head breaks. You want to be a hero? You don’t have to make some grand decision. There’s no inspirational music, there’s no montage. You just don’t quit.”

David Wong Quote: “I shoved the monster into the water, held it under, screamed “Die!” or something to that effect. After a few seconds it stopped moving and black sauce oozed out of it like an oil slick. Dr. Marconi got close enough so I could finally hear him. He said, “They’re trying to get into the water! Don’t let them!”

139. “I shoved the monster into the water, held it under, screamed “Die!” or something to that effect. After a few seconds it stopped moving and black sauce oozed out of it like an oil slick. Dr. Marconi got close enough so I could finally hear him. He said, “They’re trying to get into the water! Don’t let them!”

David Wong Quote: “You hire the right people and trust them to get it done.”

140. “You hire the right people and trust them to get it done.”

David Wong Quote: “Being against power is easy, Zoey, because you never, ever need to offer solutions or take risks.”

141. “Being against power is easy, Zoey, because you never, ever need to offer solutions or take risks.”

David Wong Quote: “Today’s cloud is tomorrow’s puddle.”

142. “Today’s cloud is tomorrow’s puddle.”

David Wong Quote: “His senior year, he started a garage band that was quickly banned from every club, bar, park, and concert hall in the region due to his insistence on playing a song called, “This Venue Is a Front for Human Trafficking, Someone Call the FBI, this Is Not Just a Joke Song Title.”

143. “His senior year, he started a garage band that was quickly banned from every club, bar, park, and concert hall in the region due to his insistence on playing a song called, “This Venue Is a Front for Human Trafficking, Someone Call the FBI, this Is Not Just a Joke Song Title.”

David Wong Quote: “She wasn’t some little princess from the suburbs who just graduated college with a humanities degree, she knew what people were really like.”

144. “She wasn’t some little princess from the suburbs who just graduated college with a humanities degree, she knew what people were really like.”

David Wong Quote: “This is a part of the country that created a nationwide ammunition shortage the day after they saw a non-white president won an election. They.”

145. “This is a part of the country that created a nationwide ammunition shortage the day after they saw a non-white president won an election. They.”

David Wong Quote: “I turned, ran, fired the shotgun into the air and shouted, “Bomb! There’s a bomb in the fountain! Everybody run for your lives! Please don’t not panic!”

146. “I turned, ran, fired the shotgun into the air and shouted, “Bomb! There’s a bomb in the fountain! Everybody run for your lives! Please don’t not panic!”

David Wong Quote: “Do they know they make the honey for you? Or do they work tirelessly because they think its their own choice?”

147. “Do they know they make the honey for you? Or do they work tirelessly because they think its their own choice?”

David Wong Quote: “Guys like him, the ones who grip the Bible so tight they leave fingernail grooves, they’re the ones who are the most scared of their dark side.”

148. “Guys like him, the ones who grip the Bible so tight they leave fingernail grooves, they’re the ones who are the most scared of their dark side.”

David Wong Quote: “I stared out of the window, at my Bronco rusting in the parking lot, the metal eager to get back to just being dirt. Life was probably easier for it back then.”

149. “I stared out of the window, at my Bronco rusting in the parking lot, the metal eager to get back to just being dirt. Life was probably easier for it back then.”

150. “The guy next to him looked like he had covered his body in glue and rolled through a knife store. At the bottom of the feed was a logo that said “LEAGUE OF BADASS.”

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