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Top 10 John Scheck Quotes (2025 Update)

John Scheck Quote: “As you get older you tend to take a more morbid view of your body’s aches and pains. When you’re young, you could lose a leg in a sawmill accident and you’d say to yourself, ‘Who cares? I’m 21, it’ll grow back.’ Once you pass 40, you’re ready to be euthanized over of a mild hangover.”

1. “As you get older you tend to take a more morbid view of your body’s aches and pains. When you’re young, you could lose a leg in a sawmill accident and you’d say to yourself, ‘Who cares? I’m 21, it’ll grow back.’ Once you pass 40, you’re ready to be euthanized over of a mild hangover.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “Making the impossible not happen is a lot easier than you may think.”

2. “Making the impossible not happen is a lot easier than you may think.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “A winner never quits and a quitter can get a partial refund on that gym membership you never use.”

3. “A winner never quits and a quitter can get a partial refund on that gym membership you never use.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “Whenever I cut myself, I always grab a stack of stationery and write my signature on as many sheets as I can before it coagulates, because I think that in this era of text messages and emails, people still appreciate a desperate, hand-written letter signed in blood.”

4. “Whenever I cut myself, I always grab a stack of stationery and write my signature on as many sheets as I can before it coagulates, because I think that in this era of text messages and emails, people still appreciate a desperate, hand-written letter signed in blood.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “Is there a name for the disease for when your body can’t tell the difference between boredom and hunger, or do I need to invent one?”

5. “Is there a name for the disease for when your body can’t tell the difference between boredom and hunger, or do I need to invent one?”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “Persistence is way over-rated. Go ahead, give up. Just quit. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone, and least of all not to yourself. And whatever the hell it is that you’re trying to do, can you at least put on a shirt?”

6. “Persistence is way over-rated. Go ahead, give up. Just quit. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone, and least of all not to yourself. And whatever the hell it is that you’re trying to do, can you at least put on a shirt?”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “Animal rights people get upset over things like whaling and baby seal clubbing, but what seems particularly cruel is humans stealing honey from bees. Bees work their tails off all day, then we swipe it and say, Sorry guys, we like to put this stuff in our tea.”

7. “Animal rights people get upset over things like whaling and baby seal clubbing, but what seems particularly cruel is humans stealing honey from bees. Bees work their tails off all day, then we swipe it and say, Sorry guys, we like to put this stuff in our tea.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “As an atheist, when you ask me to pray for something it’s like asking me to blow on the dice so you can roll a lucky seven.”

8. “As an atheist, when you ask me to pray for something it’s like asking me to blow on the dice so you can roll a lucky seven.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “The mail between Europe and the USA is so slow and unreliable that I have started to preface my letters with ‘By the time you read this, I may already be dead’ instead of ‘Dear So-and-So.”

9. “The mail between Europe and the USA is so slow and unreliable that I have started to preface my letters with ‘By the time you read this, I may already be dead’ instead of ‘Dear So-and-So.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “Either lead, follow, or sit down and have a glass of wine with one of these dates wrapped in bacon. They’re delicious!”

10. “Either lead, follow, or sit down and have a glass of wine with one of these dates wrapped in bacon. They’re delicious!”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “I’ll take a good chef knife over a firearm any day. Try cutting a chicken with a 9mm.”

11. “I’ll take a good chef knife over a firearm any day. Try cutting a chicken with a 9mm.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “If you shoot for the stars, you’ll suffocate because there’s no air in space. How do you not know this?”

12. “If you shoot for the stars, you’ll suffocate because there’s no air in space. How do you not know this?”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “People say a lot of good things about moderation. I’ve never met the fellow, but I’ve waved a few times as I gallop wildly towards excess.”

13. “People say a lot of good things about moderation. I’ve never met the fellow, but I’ve waved a few times as I gallop wildly towards excess.”

— John Scheck

John Scheck Quote: “Keep your friends close, but keep your enemies close to an open window on the tenth floor.”

14. “Keep your friends close, but keep your enemies close to an open window on the tenth floor.”

— John Scheck

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