Top 80 Louise Rennison Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “He who laughs last laughs the laughiest.”

— Louise Rennison

2. “JUST LET IT GO.”

— Louise Rennison

3. “Heathcliff. The “hero” of Wuthering Heights. Although no one knows why. He’s mean, moody, and possibly a bit on the pongy side. Cathy loves him, though. She shows this by viciously rejecting him and marrying someone else for a laugh. Still, that is true love on the moors for you.”

— Louise Rennison

4. “If you fall down those stairs and break both of your legs, don’t come running to me!”

— Louise Rennison

5. “A nod is as good as a wink to a blind badger.”

— Louise Rennison

6. “He had everything a dream boy should have. Back, front, sides, Everything. A head.”

— Louise Rennison

7. “Dance of the Sugar Plum Bikey. Yes, that’s got a nice ring to it.”

— Louise Rennison

8. “Mr. Darcy was in Pride and Prejudice and at first he was all snooty and huffy; then he fell in a lake and came out with his shirt all wet. And then we all loved him. In a swoony way.”

— Louise Rennison

9. “Still, life carries on. Exams to be examined. Serious things to be thingied.”

— Louise Rennison

10. “He said, “Hi, gorgeous,” which I think is nice. I admire honesty.”

— Louise Rennison

11. “When Mutti and Vati came in I didn’t speak to them. I just unfurled the CAT MOLESTERS banner I had made.”

— Louise Rennison

12. “You make me laugh like a loon on loon tablets!”

— Louise Rennison

13. “I am soooo excited, I am over-excited. I’m hysterical, I may have to slap my own face in a minute at this rate.”

— Louise Rennison

14. “Through my curtains I can see a big yellow moon. I’m thinking of all the people in the world who will be looking at that same moon. I wonder how many of them haven’t got any eyebrows?”

— Louise Rennison

15. “It’s hard to tell the truth sometimes, especially if you don’t want to hurt someone. And you did. You said what you feel. And you must do what is right for you, not what other people say is right.”

— Louise Rennison

16. “Its okay I’m wearing really big knickers.”

— Louise Rennison

17. “HOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!”

— Louise Rennison

18. “I‘ve said it once and I will say it again, why can‘t everyone just speak English? The Americans give it a bit of a go – why can‘t other nations?”

— Louise Rennison

19. “Your soul shines through even if you haven’t got mascara on.”

— Louise Rennison

20. “Out on the moors, The lonely moors, I roll around in sheep poo. Heathcliff, it’s youuuuu, I hate you, I love you tooooo. Let me in, I’m here, it’s meeeee, Catheeeeeeee. Look out of your windooooow.”

— Louise Rennison

21. “Vaisey looked like a startled earwig.”

— Louise Rennison

22. “I’ve never had anyone say they love me before. Libby lobes me, that is true, but there is something a bit menacing about the way she says it.”

— Louise Rennison

23. “What shall I say? I must tread a fine line between glaciosity and friendlinosity. With just a hint of ’you don’t know what you are missing, my fine-feathered friend.”

— Louise Rennison

24. “My cousin Georgia says that boys are like gazelles. She says the get alarmed when they get close to girls. And they have to leap off into the woods like gazelles in trousers. Or have I just made that up?”

— Louise Rennison

25. “When girls walk home we put on lippy and makeup. We chat. Sometimes we pretend to be hunchbacks. But that is it. Perfectly normal behavior.”

— Louise Rennison

26. “He came over and ruffled my hair, which is technically assault. I could get on the blower to ChildLine.”

— Louise Rennison

27. “What in the name of Hitler’s panties and matching bra set was she talking about?”

— Louise Rennison

28. “Shakespeare is just some bloke who keeps ranting “what light trough yonder window breaks” its the moon for god sakes!”

— Louise Rennison

29. “I like the idea that I can talk to any teenage girls. You know, in a language that makes sense to them.”

— Louise Rennison

30. “Anyway, then it said on the news, “And tonight the Prime Minister has just got to Number Ten.” I looked down at Jas and said, “Ooer.” Meaning he’d got to number ten on the snogging scale. And then we both laughed like loons. Vati just looked at us like we were mad.”

— Louise Rennison

31. “Everyone is so obsessed with themselves nowadays that they have no time for me.”

— Louise Rennison

32. “Overslept and had to race to get a life to Jas’s with my dad. No time for yoga or makeup. Oh well, I’ll start tomorrow. God alone knows how the Dalai Lama copes on a daily basis. He must get up at dawn. Actually, I read somewhere that he does get up at dawn.”

— Louise Rennison

33. “You’re fourteen years old. You’ve only had that hair for fourteen years and you want to change it already! How bored are you going to be with it by the time you are thirty? What color will you be up to by then?”

— Louise Rennison

34. “I wanted to kill her and make her eat her fringe. And her knickers.”

— Louise Rennison

35. “Here is another marvy glimpse into the gothic basement that I call my mind.”

— Louise Rennison

36. “I am looking at you and you are looking at me. This is very good. I am looking and I am liking. You are looking and you are thinking, ‘I hope she doesn’t hit me with her crop.’ But that is because I am me and you are you.”

— Louise Rennison

37. “Dad leapt over the garden wall instead of going through the gate. Sadly he didn‘t do himself a severe injury, and so he lives to embarrass me to death another day.”

— Louise Rennison

38. “Shut up Jas, you are not Baby Jesus.”

— Louise Rennison

39. “How do you make yourself not like someone?”

— Louise Rennison

40. “I think ‘growing up’ would mean that you are incredibly tolerant and easygoing, liked everything, curious about the world because you weren’t so egotistically driven.”

— Louise Rennison

41. “I’m not a ice cream, i’m a human being.”

— Louise Rennison

42. “The fly in her argument is that when she says, ‘they’ will feel like lemons, we don’t know who ‘they’ are. And ‘they’ might BE lemons.”

— Louise Rennison

43. “He has a song in his heart for me. I hope it is not “Shut Uppa You Face, Whatsa Matta You.”

— Louise Rennison

44. “Some things in life are not pleasant but they have to be done. For instance, German and maths.”

— Louise Rennison

45. “Jas, you are three hundred miles away. You would have to have nunga-nungas the size of France for Jock to be able to rest his hand on them.”

— Louise Rennison

46. “Don’t jab each other with courgettes, boys.”

— Louise Rennison

47. “And that’s when it fell off in my hand.”

— Louise Rennison

48. “I am exhausted by trying to get along with the Lord.”

— Louise Rennison

49. “Rosie get off your desk, and please put your beard away.”

— Louise Rennison

50. “At that point Ms Fox came in and said, “Hello, carry on as if I am not here.” Then she lay down on the floor.”

— Louise Rennison