Top 100 Noël Coward Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “Work is much more fun than fun.”

— Noël Coward

Featured in: Funny Inspirational Quotes, Fun Quotes

2. “A perfect martini should be made by filling a glass with gin then waving it in the general direction of Italy.”

— Noël Coward

3. “Never trust a man with short legs. His brains are too near his bottom.”

— Noël Coward

4. “It’s never too early for a cocktail.”

— Noël Coward

5. “Christmas is at our throats again.”

— Noël Coward

6. “If you must have motivation, think of your paycheck on Friday.”

— Noël Coward

7. “Work hard, do the best you can, don’t ever lose faith in yourself and take no notice of what other people say about you.”

— Noël Coward

8. “It’s discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.”

— Noël Coward

9. “Marriage is the aftermath of love.”

— Noël Coward

10. “I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me.”

— Noël Coward

11. “Mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the mid-day sun.”

— Noël Coward

12. “The higher the building the lower the morals.”

— Noël Coward

13. “I never cared who scored the goal, or which side won the silver cup. I never learned to bat or bowl; but I heard the curtain going up.”

— Noël Coward

14. “But why, oh why, do the wrong people travel, when the right people stay at home?”

— Noël Coward

15. “Grab it while you can – grab every scrap of happiness while you can.”

— Noël Coward

16. “Star quality: I don’t know what it is, but I’ve got it.”

— Noël Coward

17. “Thousands of people have talent. I might as well congratulate you for having eyes in your head. The one and only thing that counts is: Do you have staying power?”

— Noël Coward

18. “I’m not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop.”

— Noël Coward

19. “To know you are among people whom you love, and who love you – that has made all the successes wonderful, much more wonderful than they’d have been anyway.”

— Noël Coward

20. “You kissed me because you were awfully nice and I was awfully nice and we both liked kissing very much. It was inevitable.”

— Noël Coward

21. “I like long walks, especialy when they are taken by people who annoy me.”

— Noël Coward

22. “Goodnight my darlings, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

— Noël Coward

23. “Why do I drink Champagne for breakfast? Doesn’t everyone?”

— Noël Coward

24. “We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?”

— Noël Coward

25. “Las Vegas: It was not cafe society, it was Nescafe society.”

— Noël Coward

26. “He’s completely unspoiled by failure.”

— Noël Coward

27. “Madame Bovary is the sexiest book imaginable. The woman’s virtually a nyphomaniac but you won’t find a vulgar word in the entire thing.”

— Noël Coward

28. “At twelve noon, The natives swoon And no further work is doneBut mad dogs and Englishmen, Go out in the midday sun.”

— Noël Coward

29. “Familiarity breeds contempt, but without a little familiarity it’s impossible to breed anything.”

— Noël Coward

30. “Conceit is an outward manifestation of inferiority.”

— Noël Coward

31. “I want a horse and plough, Chickens too, Just one cow, With a wistful moo.”

— Noël Coward

32. “How was your flight? Well, aeronautically it was a great success. Socially, it left quite a bit to be desired.”

— Noël Coward

33. “Many years ago I remember a famous actress explaining to me with perfect seriousness that before making an entrance she always stood aside to allow God to go on first. I can also remember that on that particular occasion He gave a singularly uninspired performance.”

— Noël Coward

34. “The pleasures that once were heaven look silly at sixty-seven.”

— Noël Coward

35. “Wit ought to be a glorious treat like caviar; never spread it about like marmalade.”

— Noël Coward

36. “Good heavens, television is something you appear on; you don’t watch.”

— Noël Coward

37. “Bed is the perfect climate.”

— Noël Coward

38. “I’m over-educated in the things I shouldn’t have known at all.”

— Noël Coward

39. “As one gets older, one discovers everything is going to be exactly the same with different hats on.”

— Noël Coward

40. “You will know you’re old when you cease to be amazed.”

— Noël Coward

41. “I’m an enormously talented man, and there’s no use pretending that I’m not...”

— Noël Coward

42. “Though the fact that they have to be rebuilt And frequently mortgaged to the hilt Is inclined to take the gilt Off the gingerbread, And certainly damps the fun Of the eldest son.”

— Noël Coward

Featured in: Fun Quotes

43. “I love criticism just so long as it’s unqualified praise.”

— Noël Coward

44. “Criticism and Bolshevism have one thing in common. They both seek to pull down that which they could never build.”

— Noël Coward

45. “I’ll go and see anything so long as it amuses me, or moves me. If it doesn’t do either I want to go home.”

— Noël Coward

46. “What I adore is supreme professionalism. I’m bored by writers who can write only when it’s raining.”

— Noël Coward

47. “Exercise is the most awful illusion. The secret is a lot of aspirin and marrons glaces.”

— Noël Coward

48. “The Stately Homes of England, How beautiful they stand, To prove the Upper Classes, Have still the Upper Hand.”

— Noël Coward

49. “For gin, in cruel sober truth, supplies the fuel for flaming youth.”

— Noël Coward

50. “There isn’t a particle of you that I don’t know, remember, and want.”

— Noël Coward