Top 120 Richard Kadrey Quotes (2025 Update)

1. “When you’re born in a burning house, you think the whole world is on fire. But it’s not.”

— Richard Kadrey

2. “Memories are bullets. Some whiz by and only spook you. Others tear you open and leave you in pieces.”

— Richard Kadrey

3. “In the Tarot deck, the Fool is depicted as a young man about to step off a cliff into empty air. Most people assume that the Fool will fall. But we don’t see it happen, and a Fool doesn’t know that he’s subject to the laws of gravity. Against all odds, he just might float.”

— Richard Kadrey

4. “Lucifer was his name in Perdition. In Heaven, he’s Samael.”

— Richard Kadrey

5. “They were the understanding eyes of kindly folk who burned witches alive to save their souls.”

— Richard Kadrey

6. “Besides Getting my ass kicked, my main accomplishment on this trip has been to massacre an incredible number of completely innocent clothes. I’m the Joseph Stalin of laundry.”

— Richard Kadrey

7. “Once angels get an idea in their head, there’s no arguing with them. Like cops and people who listen to reggae.”

— Richard Kadrey

8. “All are equal in the grave.”

— Richard Kadrey

9. “It’s more than coping. It’s adaptation. You go into the dark one species and mutate to fit your surroundings. Grow better eyes and ears. Get used to the feel of the air so you can tell when something is coming at you. After a while you’re so suited to the environment you’re a whole new species.”

— Richard Kadrey

10. “Sometimes there’s nothing worse than the truth. It can be harder and sharper and hurt more than a knife. The truth can clear a room faster than tear gas.”

— Richard Kadrey

11. “It doesn’t matter if you and everyone else in the room are thinking it. You don’t say the words. Words are weapons. They blast big bloody holes in the world. And words are bricks. Say something out loud and it starts turning solid. Say it loud enough and it becomes a wall you can’t get through.”

— Richard Kadrey

12. “Try not to sing too many sad songs for yourself. The universe already hates you. Self-pity isn’t going to help.”

— Richard Kadrey

13. “No wonder Sherlock Holmes did all that coke. Math is hard.”

— Richard Kadrey

14. “Enemies will kill you with a knife in the back. Friends will kill you with kindness. Either way you’re dead.”

— Richard Kadrey

15. “I’m not a huge fan of other people’s logic.”

— Richard Kadrey

16. “Memories are bullets. Some whiz by and only spook you. Others tear you open and leave you in pieces. Someday the right one will catch you in between the eyes and you’ll never see it coming.”

— Richard Kadrey

17. “I tap a Malediction out of the box, fire it up, and puff. It tastes like a tire fire in a candy factory next door to a strip club. The best cigarettes ever.”

— Richard Kadrey

18. “How do you explain to someone that you understand their fear, then convince them that it’s going to be all right? In my experience, the more you talk about what scares them, the worse it gets. There’s not much to do but ride out the fear with them and try to keep them away from liquor and razor blades.”

— Richard Kadrey

19. “Fear is like curling up under a warm blanket for some people, especially the rich.”

— Richard Kadrey

20. “Kasabian’s head is still under the bed. I pull it out and set it on his chest, then grab his body by the ankles and drag him into the Cube. I straighten the arms and legs, set Kas’s head back on its shoulders, and generally try to make him look more like a respectable human being and less like a big pile of loser jerky.”

— Richard Kadrey

21. “The place looks like where David Lynch would meet Beaver Cleaver’s mom for secret afternoons of bondage and milkshakes.”

— Richard Kadrey

22. “You have to burn beliefs when they become convenient lies solely for the purpose of gaining and holding power.”

— Richard Kadrey

23. “Maybe home isn’t the place you love, just the place you know best.”

— Richard Kadrey

24. “The winners are the schemers and the ruthless who take what they want, not the suckers standing around hoping for an even break.”

— Richard Kadrey

25. “If I learned anything Downtown, it’s this: the only real difference between an enemy and a friend is the day of the week.”

— Richard Kadrey

26. “The thing you have to understand about Lucifer is that he hardly ever talks, and when he does, it’s never much more than a whisper. When half the universe is hanging on to your every word, you don’t have to shout.”

— Richard Kadrey

27. “Carlos comes back with our drinks. “What should we drink to?” “To love,” says Brigitte. “To the few loyal customers I have left,” says Carlos. I have to think for a minute. “To the dead. Let’s think of them always, but not join them too soon.” Everyone in the bar drinks to that.”

— Richard Kadrey

28. “Thank God for whiskey or the world would be so full of secrets the weight would spin us into the sun.”

— Richard Kadrey

29. “You’re a philosopher.” “No. Just drunk.”

— Richard Kadrey

30. “Everyone in California is a Buddhist for fifteen minutes. Then they realize they’re not allowed to eat chili dogs and enlightenment starts sounding like a real drag.”

— Richard Kadrey

31. “The only way I can attract more attention is if I was towing a Spanish galleon full of half-naked cheerleaders with flare guns.”

— Richard Kadrey

32. “If Jesus, Jesse James, and a herd of pink robot unicorns strolled in walking on water, this bunch wouldn’t even look up.”

— Richard Kadrey

33. “Fortunately, I’m good at ignoring a lot of what my brain does.”

— Richard Kadrey

34. “I hate politics. It’s the lowest act a human being can sink to.”

— Richard Kadrey

35. “We must always look after our friends, even when they are foolish. Especially when they are foolish.”

— Richard Kadrey

36. “No, humans are good at growing bones, toenails, and cancer. That’s about it.”

— Richard Kadrey

37. “Proximity to normalcy is a nice turn of phrase; you ought do a needlepoint, frame it and shove it straight up your ass. Keep it there with the rest of your wisdom.”

— Richard Kadrey

38. “Young man, there are some things in the world so profane that their only real value is in not knowing about them.”

— Richard Kadrey

39. “Cash is the magic that anyone can do.”

— Richard Kadrey

40. “The third time you commit murder, you change into that extra shirt you brought along, the one that’s not covered in blood, and you go out for a drink.”

— Richard Kadrey

41. “Merry-go-rounds are a shared lie of childhood. Cruelty masked as fun. Tedium cloaked as adventure. A great spinning vessel of torment getting the tykes ready for the damnation most of them will richly deserve, all because their minds were permanently twisted by this parade of pony horrors.”

— Richard Kadrey

42. “I’ve come a long way to get nowhere at all, I thought. And I’ve spent everything I have to get here.”

— Richard Kadrey

43. “Quid salvum est si Roma perit?” What is safe if Rome perishes?”

— Richard Kadrey

44. “Did I hurt your feelings again? Sorry. When this is all over I’ll send some flowers to your inner child.”

— Richard Kadrey

45. “My head is full of monsters and I’m one of them.”

— Richard Kadrey

46. “Being able to embrace contradictions is a sign of intelligence. Or insanity.”

— Richard Kadrey

47. “When you jump off a cliff, is it better to land on jagged rocks or burning lava? I know this one. The answer is obvious: It doesn’t matter where you land. You just jumped off a cliff.”

— Richard Kadrey

48. “He’s a little ray of sunshine, your partner.” “I look at him as my last training test. Can I work with him long enough without shooting him to get a promotion?”

— Richard Kadrey

49. “Every time stupid rich people get ripped off, it makes them feel better about hating poor people.”

— Richard Kadrey

50. “The ashes of your existence will fertilize the soil for the universe to follow.”

— Richard Kadrey