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Top 25 Valarie Kaur Quotes (2025 Update)

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Deep listening is an act of surrender. We risk being changed by what we hear.”

1. “Deep listening is an act of surrender. We risk being changed by what we hear.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Revolutions do not happen only in grand moments in public view but also in small pockets of people coming together to inhabit a new way of being. We birth the beloved community by becoming the beloved community.”

2. “Revolutions do not happen only in grand moments in public view but also in small pockets of people coming together to inhabit a new way of being. We birth the beloved community by becoming the beloved community.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Revolutionary love” is the choice to enter into wonder and labor for others, for our opponents, and for ourselves in order to transform the world around us. It is not a formal code or prescription but an orientation to life that is personal and political and rooted in joy. Loving only ourselves is escapism; loving only our opponents is self-loathing; loving only others is ineffective. All three practices together make love revolutionary, and revolutionary love can only be practiced in community.”

3. “Revolutionary love” is the choice to enter into wonder and labor for others, for our opponents, and for ourselves in order to transform the world around us. It is not a formal code or prescription but an orientation to life that is personal and political and rooted in joy. Loving only ourselves is escapism; loving only our opponents is self-loathing; loving only others is ineffective. All three practices together make love revolutionary, and revolutionary love can only be practiced in community.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Grief is the price of love. Loving someone means that one day, there will be grieving. They will leave you, or you will leave them. The more you love, the more you grieve. Loving someone also means grieving with them. It means letting their pain and loss bleed into your own heart. When you see that pain coming, you may want to throw up the guardrails, sound the alarm, raise the flag, but you must keep the borders of your heart porous in order to love well. Grieving is an act of surrender.”

4. “Grief is the price of love. Loving someone means that one day, there will be grieving. They will leave you, or you will leave them. The more you love, the more you grieve. Loving someone also means grieving with them. It means letting their pain and loss bleed into your own heart. When you see that pain coming, you may want to throw up the guardrails, sound the alarm, raise the flag, but you must keep the borders of your heart porous in order to love well. Grieving is an act of surrender.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “The aim of divine rage is not vengeance but to reorder the world. It is precise and purposeful, like the focused fury projected into the world from the forehead of the goddess. It points us to the humanity of even those who we are fighting.”

5. “The aim of divine rage is not vengeance but to reorder the world. It is precise and purposeful, like the focused fury projected into the world from the forehead of the goddess. It points us to the humanity of even those who we are fighting.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Love is more than a rush of feeling. Love is sweet labor – fierce, bloody, imperfect, and life-giving. A choice we make over and over again.”

6. “Love is more than a rush of feeling. Love is sweet labor – fierce, bloody, imperfect, and life-giving. A choice we make over and over again.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Love” is more than a feeling. Love is a form of sweet labor: fierce, bloody, imperfect, and life-giving – a choice we make over and over again. If love is sweet labor, love can be taught, modeled, and practiced. This labor engages all our emotions. Joy is the gift of love. Grief is the price of love. Anger protects that which is loved. And when we think we have reached our limit, wonder is the act that returns us to love.”

7. “Love” is more than a feeling. Love is a form of sweet labor: fierce, bloody, imperfect, and life-giving – a choice we make over and over again. If love is sweet labor, love can be taught, modeled, and practiced. This labor engages all our emotions. Joy is the gift of love. Grief is the price of love. Anger protects that which is loved. And when we think we have reached our limit, wonder is the act that returns us to love.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “There is no such thing as monsters in this world. There are only human beings who are wounded.”

8. “There is no such thing as monsters in this world. There are only human beings who are wounded.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Shallow solidarity was based on the logic of exchange – You show up for me, and I will show up for you. But deep solidarity was rooted in recognition – I show up for you, because I see you as part of me. Your liberation is bound up in my own.”

9. “Shallow solidarity was based on the logic of exchange – You show up for me, and I will show up for you. But deep solidarity was rooted in recognition – I show up for you, because I see you as part of me. Your liberation is bound up in my own.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “When we choose to wonder about people we don’t know, when we imagine their lives and listen for their stories, we begin to expand the circle of those we see as part of us. We prepare ourselves to love beyond what evolution requires.”

10. “When we choose to wonder about people we don’t know, when we imagine their lives and listen for their stories, we begin to expand the circle of those we see as part of us. We prepare ourselves to love beyond what evolution requires.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “I think the inability to love is the central problem, because that inability masks a certain terror, and that terror is the terror of being touched. And if you can’t be touched, you can’t be changed. And if you can’t be changed, you can’t be alive. – James Baldwin.”

11. “I think the inability to love is the central problem, because that inability masks a certain terror, and that terror is the terror of being touched. And if you can’t be touched, you can’t be changed. And if you can’t be changed, you can’t be alive. – James Baldwin.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “When suffering constricts the heart, awe stretches it back out, making us more compassionate, more loving, more present.”

12. “When suffering constricts the heart, awe stretches it back out, making us more compassionate, more loving, more present.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Unresolved grief inside a person is tragic; unresolved grief inside a nation is catastrophic.”

13. “Unresolved grief inside a person is tragic; unresolved grief inside a nation is catastrophic.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “But the purpose of listening across lines of difference is not agreement or compromise. It is understanding. True understanding is not possible unless we risk changing our worldview. Otherwise we think we have built bridges to one another, but the bridges are rooted in sands that can shift with the tide. Solidarity is only possible if we are brave enough to reckon with the past and how the past shapes the present. In the United States, this means confronting the reality of white supremacy.”

14. “But the purpose of listening across lines of difference is not agreement or compromise. It is understanding. True understanding is not possible unless we risk changing our worldview. Otherwise we think we have built bridges to one another, but the bridges are rooted in sands that can shift with the tide. Solidarity is only possible if we are brave enough to reckon with the past and how the past shapes the present. In the United States, this means confronting the reality of white supremacy.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Right relationship is knowing that we are interconnected and finding a form of connection that allows us peace. Sometimes right relationship means reentering each other’s lives. Sometimes it means staying apart.”

15. “Right relationship is knowing that we are interconnected and finding a form of connection that allows us peace. Sometimes right relationship means reentering each other’s lives. Sometimes it means staying apart.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “I was beginning to learn that home is the space within us and between us where we feel safe – and brave. It is not a physical space as much as it is a field of being.”

16. “I was beginning to learn that home is the space within us and between us where we feel safe – and brave. It is not a physical space as much as it is a field of being.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Our lives are long and our circles are small. We remain linked to the ones have loved, if only in our minds. The question is how to be in right relationship with them, even if we may never agree with each other, or even see each other again. Right relationship is knowing that we are interconnected and finding a form of connection that allows us peace.”

17. “Our lives are long and our circles are small. We remain linked to the ones have loved, if only in our minds. The question is how to be in right relationship with them, even if we may never agree with each other, or even see each other again. Right relationship is knowing that we are interconnected and finding a form of connection that allows us peace.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “In the United States, white supremacy is intertwined with Christian supremacy, one an extension of the other. Any theology that teaches that God will torture the people in front of you in the afterlife creates the imaginative space for you to do so yourself on earth.”

18. “In the United States, white supremacy is intertwined with Christian supremacy, one an extension of the other. Any theology that teaches that God will torture the people in front of you in the afterlife creates the imaginative space for you to do so yourself on earth.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “When we leave people alone with their pain, their alienation becomes the precondition for radicalization.”

19. “When we leave people alone with their pain, their alienation becomes the precondition for radicalization.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Every unjust social institution in history seemed permanent until it was imagined otherwise.”

20. “Every unjust social institution in history seemed permanent until it was imagined otherwise.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “No one should be asked to feel empathy or compassion for their oppressors. I have learned that we do not need to feel anything for our opponents at all in order to practice love. Love is labor that returns us to wonder – it is seeing another person’s humanity, even if they deny their own. We just have to choose to wonder about them.”

21. “No one should be asked to feel empathy or compassion for their oppressors. I have learned that we do not need to feel anything for our opponents at all in order to practice love. Love is labor that returns us to wonder – it is seeing another person’s humanity, even if they deny their own. We just have to choose to wonder about them.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Can you choose one person to practice wondering about? Can you listen to the story they have to tell? If your fists tighten, or your heart beats fast, or if shame rises to your face, it’s okay. Breathe through it. Trust that you can. The heart is a muscle: The more you use it, the stronger it becomes.”

22. “Can you choose one person to practice wondering about? Can you listen to the story they have to tell? If your fists tighten, or your heart beats fast, or if shame rises to your face, it’s okay. Breathe through it. Trust that you can. The heart is a muscle: The more you use it, the stronger it becomes.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “As long as I compared my suffering with others’, I could not access compassion for myself, only more shame.”

23. “As long as I compared my suffering with others’, I could not access compassion for myself, only more shame.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “True understanding is not possible unless we risk changing our worldview. Otherwise we think we have built bridges to one another, but the bridges are rooted in sands that can shift with the tide.”

24. “True understanding is not possible unless we risk changing our worldview. Otherwise we think we have built bridges to one another, but the bridges are rooted in sands that can shift with the tide.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Love made him see with new eyes: Everyone around him was a part of him that he did not yet know.”

25. “Love made him see with new eyes: Everyone around him was a part of him that he did not yet know.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Our lives are long and our circles are small. We remain linked to the ones we have loved, if only in our minds.”

26. “Our lives are long and our circles are small. We remain linked to the ones we have loved, if only in our minds.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “On the other side of rage awaits the ability to wonder again at the spinning world.”

27. “On the other side of rage awaits the ability to wonder again at the spinning world.”

— Valarie Kaur

Valarie Kaur Quote: “Grief does not come in clean stages: It is more like the current of a river, sweeping us into new emotional terrain, twisting and turning unexpectedly.”

28. “Grief does not come in clean stages: It is more like the current of a river, sweeping us into new emotional terrain, twisting and turning unexpectedly.”

— Valarie Kaur

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