Top 100

Top 150 Bill Hicks Quotes (2024 Update)
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Bill Hicks Quote: “That’s why I always recommend a psychedelic experience because it makes you realize that all you’ve learned is in fact just learned and not necessarily the truth.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Rock stars against drugs – that’s what we want, isn’t it? Government-approved rock-n-roll? Woo! We’re partying now!”
Bill Hicks Quote: “If you’re so pro-life, do me a favour: don’t lock arms and block medical clinics. If you’re so pro-life, lock arms and block cemeteries.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “I’m just skin covering coffee and some real nervous teeth.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “They Want You To Be A Docile Apathetic Consumer.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “I loved when Bush came out and said, ‘We are losing the war against drugs.’ You know what that implies? There’s a war being fought, and the people on drugs are winning it.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “I’m an American who loves an America which doesn’t exist, which is a land of freedom and free ideas.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “There is a 3rd point of view on the gun control issue – those who I refer to as THE VICTIMS – but they remain strangely silent...”
Bill Hicks Quote: “You are the imagination of yourself.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Man, the Beatles were so high, they let Ringo sing a coupla tunes. Tell me they weren’t partyin’.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “It’s my object to be stared at like a dog that’s just been shown a card trick.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “We’re supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?”
Bill Hicks Quote: “What does an atheist scream when they come?”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Good comedy helps people know they’re not alone. Great comedy provides an answer.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “If I thought the Jews killed God, I’d worship the Jews.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “The best kind of comedy to me is when you make people laugh at things they’ve never laughed at, and also take a light into the darkened corners of people’s minds, exposing them to the light.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “By the way, if anyone here is in advertising or marketing, kill yourself.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “If you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD’s and burn them.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “I wouldn’t give Satan a snowball’s chance in Hell against a woman’s ego...”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd coming out of your ass.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Writing, acting, music, comedy. A deep love of literature and books. Thank God for all the artists who’ve helped me.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Nonsmokers – this is for you and you only. Ready? Nonsmokers die every day. Sleep tight.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “If ur going to have a war on drugs, have them against ALL drugs, including alcohol, the number one offender.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “I smoke to fill the potholes in my soul.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “People often ask me where I stand politically. It’s not that I disagree with Bush’s economic policy or his foreign policy, it’s that I believe he was a child of Satan sent here to destroy the planet Earth. Little to the left.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Why is marijuana against the law? It grows naturally on our planet, serves a thousand different functions, all of them positive. To make marijuana against the law is like saying that God made a mistake.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You’re not a human being until you’re in my phone book.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Keith Richards outlived Jim Fixx, the runner and health nut. The plot thickens.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Jesus-murdered. Martin Luther King-murdered. Gandhi-murdered. Malcolm X-murdered. Reagan-wounded.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “And I’m not getting laid! What am I doing wrong?”
Bill Hicks Quote: “You all saw him – he had a gun.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Dinosaur fossils were placed in rocks by prankster God just to make human beings think the world is older than it is.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Watching television is like taking black spray paint to your third eye.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Well we looked at all the people in the Bible and we added ’em up all the way back to Adam and Eve, their ages: 12,000 years.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “The role of the comedian is to say ‘Wait a minute’ when a consensus starts to form.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don’t know one child with a full time job and children.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “I’m a heavy smoker. I go through two lighters a day.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “I began working quite young, writing, growing, maturing, always striving to top myself – to make people laugh hard at things they know and believe deep in their hearts to be true.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Will there be titty? Sure. Boom! I’m a producer. Where you been all our life, boy? We been lookin for you in Hollywood.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Why do we put people who are on drugs in jail? They’re sick, they’re not criminals. Sick people don’t get healed in prison. You see? It makes no sense.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Do I have a message? Yes, I do. Here’s my message: as scary as the world is – and it is – it is merely a ride...”
Bill Hicks Quote: “It’s really weird how your life changes. Tonight I’m drinking water. Four years ago? Opium. Night and day, you know?”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Been on what I call my Flying Saucer Tour – appearing in small Southern towns – in front of handfuls of hillbillies.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “I love the Pope, I love seeing him in his Pope-Mobile, his three feet of bullet proof plexi-glass. That’s faith in action folks! You know he’s got God on his side.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Hitler had the right idea, he was just an underachiever.”
Bill Hicks Quote: “People always snap and think they’re Jesus. How come no one ever snaps and thinks they’re Buddha?”
Bill Hicks Quote: “Right foot, left foot, hemorrhage.”
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