Top 150 Bill Hicks Quotes (2024 Update)

1. “Don’t worry, don’t be afraid, ever, because this is just a ride.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Perspective Quotes, Life Is Short Quotes, Fear Quotes, Worry Quotes

2. “It’s just a ride.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Funny Quotes, Meaning Quotes, Perspective Quotes, Life Is Short Quotes, Quotes About Reality

3. “There are essentially only two drugs that Western civilization tolerates: Caffeine from Monday to Friday to energize you enough to make you a productive member of society, and alcohol from Friday to Monday to keep you too stupid to figure out the prison that you are living in.”

— Bill Hicks

4. “Humanity is just a virus with shoes.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Quotes About Humanity

5. “Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Here’s Tom with the Weather.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Awakening Quotes, Universe Quotes, Existentialism Quotes

6. “Oh sorry, I was taking life seriously.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Sarcastic Quotes, Humor Quotes

7. “It’s all about money, not freedom. If you think you’re free, try going somewhere without money, okay?”

— Bill Hicks

8. “Any organization created out of fear must create fear to survive.”

— Bill Hicks

9. “I don’t mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that’s how it comes out.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Humor Quotes

10. “I left in love, in laughter, and in truth, and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Quotes About Laughter

11. “It’s an insane world, and I’m proud to be a part of it.”

— Bill Hicks

12. “Would you let the aliens land, please? They might be here to pick me up.”

— Bill Hicks

13. “If you are living for tomorrow, you will always be one day behind.”

— Bill Hicks

14. “I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.”

— Bill Hicks

15. “Oh my God. Lift me up out of this illusion, Lord. Heal my perception that I might know only reality and only you.”

— Bill Hicks

16. “All governments are lying cocksuckers.”

— Bill Hicks

17. “All your beliefs, they’re just that. They’re nothing. They’re how you were taught and raised. That doesn’t make ’em real.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Real Quotes

18. “I need my sleep. I need about eight hours a day, and about ten at night.”

— Bill Hicks

19. “I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative.”

— Bill Hicks

20. “It has become more and more obvious that there is one political party in America, and that is The Business Party.”

— Bill Hicks

21. “No one can give you any answers. There aren’t any. You have to discover for yourself-you must learn to navigate the mystery.”

— Bill Hicks

22. “It’s not a war on drugs, it’s a war on personal freedom.”

— Bill Hicks

23. “What are you reading for?”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Reading Quotes

24. “We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.”

— Bill Hicks

25. “We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution.”

— Bill Hicks

26. “I don’t care if you’re obscene, filthy, horrendous – as long as you’re honest.”

— Bill Hicks

27. “I can’t watch TV longer than five minutes without praying for nuclear holocaust.”

— Bill Hicks

28. “I’m totally confused about what I’m going to do with my life.”

— Bill Hicks

29. “It’s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it’s just hilarious.”

— Bill Hicks

30. “The eyes of love see all of us as one.”

— Bill Hicks

31. “They proved that if you quit smoking, it will prolong your life. What they haven’t proved is that a prolonged life is a good thing. I haven’t seen the stats on that yet.”

— Bill Hicks

32. “Ever noticed that people who believe in Creationism look really unevolved?”

— Bill Hicks

33. “You ever noticed how people who believe in Creationism look really un-evolved? You ever noticed that? Eyes real close together, eyebrow ridges, big furry hands and feet. “I believe God created me in one day”. Yeah, looks like He rushed it.”

— Bill Hicks

Featured in: Real Quotes

34. “Isn’t that weird, we’ve made nature against the law. That’s how un-natural we’ve become.”

— Bill Hicks

35. “I just have one of those faces. People come up to me and say, ‘What’s wrong?’ Nothing. ‘Well, it takes more energy to frown than it does to smile.’ Yeah, you know it takes more energy to point that out than it does to leave me alone?”

— Bill Hicks

36. “I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift.”

— Bill Hicks

37. “You think when Jesus comes back, he really wants to see a cross? That’s like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on.”

— Bill Hicks

38. “Shut up! Go back to bed, America. Your government is in control. Here’s Love Connection. Watch this and get fat and stupid.”

— Bill Hicks

39. “Pot is a better drug than alcohol. I’ll prove it to you. You’re at a ball game or a concert, and someone’s really violent and agressive and obnoxious, are they drunk or are they smoking pot?”

— Bill Hicks

40. “Be yourself on stage. Nobody else can be you and you have the law of supply and demand covered.”

— Bill Hicks

41. “Music is a great energizer. It’s a language everybody knows.”

— Bill Hicks

42. “I ascribe to Mark Twain’s theory that the last person who should be President is the one who wants it the most. The one who should be picked is the one who should be dragged kicking and screaming into the White House.”

— Bill Hicks

43. “Listen, the next revolution is gonna be a revolution of ideas.”

— Bill Hicks

44. “Women priests. Great, great. Now there’s priests of both sexes I don’t listen to.”

— Bill Hicks

45. “I’m just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious...”

— Bill Hicks

46. “I do not believe making money in order to consume goods is mankind’s sole purpose on this planet.”

— Bill Hicks

47. “What kind of people are these with such low self-esteem that they need a war to feel better about themselves?”

— Bill Hicks

48. “To make marijuana against the law is like saying God made a big mistake.”

— Bill Hicks

49. “The American dream is a crock. Stop wanting everything. Everyone should wear jeans and have three T-shirts, eat rice and beans.”

— Bill Hicks

50. “Mushrooms grow on cow turds. I love that. I think that’s why you giggle the first hour.”

— Bill Hicks